Domestic abuse

[marmiters]

I've just filed an injunction against my ex. It's a non-molestation order, and I'm hoping it means he can no longer contact my family members and cancel my son's appointments to mess with me. He was emotionally abusive and cruel to me.

He's not a nice person and was also abusive to his ex it seems.

So why do I feel sorry for him? I don't know what's wrong with me. I hate him, so much, but I feel gut wrenching guilt. It's like I've got the equivalent of Stockholm syndrome!

I'm also terrified of going to court and him being there. I don't know I can deal with seeing him.

Can anyone advise? Or talk some sense in to me?

Well done! I got out as well and like you feel so sorry for him in a way but his cruelty was so bad to the point of being threatened I would never see my kids and just psychological torture of everything kind.. However if your ex wants access in future and he takes you to court whatever SS say now will change further down the line and if you deny access and continually do it’s not a myth that the mother can lose custody. I went through this and I didn’t lose custody but long story. The course I went to had a several mums who either had shared or lost residency 🤢 and When I went to refugee woman’s aid I remember the lady Saying they heard horrendous stories and it really scared me. If he does take you to court be aware he has to have been proven to be very abusive towards the children and if you deny all contact and then it may not end well. Really is hard to say.

Good luck and well done. I’m still very much sad some days though of what could have been as a family.