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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can he change my childs school?

14 replies

FetaAndPepper · 08/05/2019 12:51

I have changed names as can't risk being outed.

Husband and I split 10 years ago. He was extremely emotionally abusive, controlling and manipulative. Still is despite being divorced and in a new relationship.

I cant give full details but my daughter is now living with him (through choice? I dont know - see above reasons we split).

Daughter now wont speak to me at all and ignores all my side of her family. Now heard rumours that Ex H is planning on moving her schools. Can this be done without my consent?

OP posts:
Original poster
FetaAndPepper · 08/05/2019 12:52

btw we have always been relaxed about contact. He rarely wanted her or her 3 sisters but things have changed recently and he is being v difficult

OP posts:
IAmTheChosenOne · 08/05/2019 12:54

Yes he can, he has PR so can make these decsions. He is the current RP. If you ahve been divorced 10 years, I would assume your daughter is old enough to have input into decsions affecting her.

Original poster
FetaAndPepper · 08/05/2019 12:56

She has been living with me up until 2 months ago, he has alienated her.
As she is living with him, that makes him RP?

OP posts:
pikapikachu · 08/05/2019 12:58

Yes. Especially if he gets child benefit and his address registered with the school, gp etc

pikapikachu · 08/05/2019 13:00

I'm assuming that she's secondary school age. A judge would abide by her wishes for contact.

handmademitlove · 08/05/2019 13:01

I would suggest asking this on the legal board as the information may be more accurate! Everyone with PR has a say in which school a child attends unless there is a court order to the contrary.

Selmababies · 08/05/2019 13:06

Can you not go to the family court with a view to getting a specific issue order?
How old is your daughter? As a general rule, the older she is, the more weight will be put on her wishes.

titchy · 08/05/2019 13:09

No he can't do it without your consent. BOTH parties with PR need to agree, or take the matter to court if they disagree where various factors including logistics of travel, and maybe what child want if they're of secondary school age. Flag with LEA/school for now that you don't give permission. There may not be a vacancy anyway!

Original poster
FetaAndPepper · 08/05/2019 13:10

Yes. Especially if he gets child benefit and his address registered with the school

He has not yet started claiming this or changed address with the school. She now no longer goes out with her friends or talks to my parents or her sisters.

Seeing solicitor tomorrow about an emergency contact order

OP posts:
Original poster
FetaAndPepper · 08/05/2019 13:11

She is 10, split shortly after she was born after a voilent episode that I did not report

OP posts:
Tini17 · 08/05/2019 13:11

No, he can’t do so without your consent as you have PR too. Get some legal advice. But I would start by writing to current school with the position and the LA so as not to permit the transfer without your consent.
How old is she / what level school are we talking?

Mayalready · 08/05/2019 13:12

Speak to the education authority for the area. I had to have exh's signature before I could move ds's school or it would have been via court.
See a solicitor as parental alienation is an offence.

Tini17 · 08/05/2019 13:12

Sorry, cross post.
Good luck x

Original poster
FetaAndPepper · 08/05/2019 13:16

See a solicitor as parental alienation is an offence

a case is being built. School are very aware of the situation.

Thank you for all of your help. I will probably try to get this thread removed soon as he seems to know everything I do.

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