Feeling judged about baby sleep

[TWISTYBIRD]

I had an amazing routine for my son. He is 6 months old and he was falling asleep at 7:30pm, waking up at 6, every day. Suited me! I felt really lucky.

Now, he's teething. Falls asleep whenever he pleases regardless of how rigorously I stick to his bedtime routine. Wakes up chewing his hand at night because his teeth are hurting him. My friend came over and made a comment, saying that I'm creating a rod for my own back 😥 am I? Should I be doing something differently?

He just won't sleep. I feel like the way she did it implied that I had done this. Like I screwed up his sleep. He fell asleep in the day and I was so exhausted I went to sleep with him. Again, she told me I shouldn't let him sleep for so long in the day. But I was exhausted. I had to sleep. It was blissful.

AIBU to feel like I'm doing it all wrong? Single mum to a 6 month old is so hard.

Bloody hell he is 6 months old that's so little. You're doing a great job. Your friend on the other hand sounds clueless.

I coslept with my first baby until he was about 18 months old. Fed him or cuddled him to sleep often, shock horror, he's been a great sleeper since he was about 2. I'm now doing the same with DC2. No rods here.

Rod for your own back... pffft, what a load of old shite. Ignore! Or suggest your know it all friend babysits for the night and see if she can do any better as she's so wise?

The rod for your own back comments are the worst. My DS wouldn't sleep for longer than 30 mins in his cot for naps so I let him sleep on me for ages. People said he wouldn't ever nap properly if I let him sleep on me...he's now 10 months old and he has 2 1-1.5 hour naps a day and sleeps 7pm-6am every night regardless.

My point, like so many of the PP's, is to do what you need to do. Don't listen to other people, you know your baby best!

Babies physically can't learn a routine that young. They either sleep or they don't and you got a sleeper!

Routine is great though if it helps you as a parent to feel more in control and happy about everything. The down side is when normal things like teething or developmental leaps happen it's harder as they routine stops working and it feels like you are battling them to get back to 'the routine' they never knew anything about :)

As cliched as it is, everything is just a phase with babies. The teething will pass, they will go back to their way of sleeping and you'll forget how horrific it was until the next phase 😂

Your friend is an idiot. Probably jealous you got a sleeping one. Just do what ever is needed to ride this out and keep your sanity even if that means ignoring that friend for a bit!

Ha, my DS didn't get into a routine until he was almost 1 What with teething, growth spurts, sleep regressions etc! My friends baby settled into a perfect routine straight away. I think they either sleep or they don't. Don't beat yourself up, he's still little and teething, he'll settle down again. And ignore your friend!

My first was a dream baby. Slept through from about 9 weeks and loved a routine. Number two is SATAN👹. Could easily give him away. Sleeps for short bursts, up 5am most mornings for the day. Will nap all day if left to it because he is tired from not sleeping all night. I am a shell of a woman with him. Your child will sort themselves out eventually (my mantra)

He’s teething! Poor little dude is in pain that’s why he’s waking. Teething hurts babies. Nothing to do with routines etc. Give him some Calpol, a bottle or boob, anything that soothes him. This time will pass.

Hey, you :)

So, I felt guilty AF for everything my PFB did/didnt do because she was apparently perfect (til about potty training age when her problems became noticeable).

You're lucky to have had such an amazing routine, well done. My PFB was bottlers from eight days and was always pleasant and went down like a dream.

Until teething. She started grizzling about eight months. We'd had such a great run by that point that we were absolutely not prepared. She hadn't even been sick until then (except for having terrible reflux which was never treated).

I'm sorry to say I would ring my exh at his workplace and cry down the phone til someone called him to the phone.

With both my kids, the only thing which worked was the teething powder from thingy and Parsons. The old fashioned looking one. And the best way is to repeatedly, frequently, borderline constantly, rub granules from your finger onto their gums.

Softens the gums, making it easier for the teeth to pop through.

Considered it myself with my wisdom teeth but ended up with a general anaesthetic removal due to impaction.

Good luck, sleep when he does, get the rest you both need. Being in pain is extremely tiring. You can do this.

Bottlefed, not bottlers. My second was a nightmare.