To be considering being teetotal?

[chipstickcrisps]

I attended a friend's' do yesterday without my dh and while l wasn't the worst I've ever been I certainly partook in far too many vinos. Wine and I have a complicated relationship and while sometimes I can have a few glasses and be totally fine, sometimes it'll hit me like a brick wall and I'll become a sloppy mess. My husband usually (by my request) keeps an eye on me but I have a tendency (particularly with wine) to get snippy with him when I've had a bit to drink. I always end up feeling awful about it as it's very undeserved.

Woke up this morning with "the shame" and while I think that's more the depressive effects of alcohol rather than my actions, I'm once again wondering if drinking is really worth it.

As not to drip feed, I grew up with a severely alcoholic mum. The town drunk as she was referred to. And now my dad is a full blown alcoholic as well. My own relationship with alcohol is complicated as well where I'll go for months without drinking and then have an event where I just end up going overboard. A lot of my "shameovers" are usually me panicking that I'm becoming my parents etc.

I can function without alcohol happily, but there's certainly the social pressure from friends and family to drink.

Has anybody completely dropped alcohol? How have you dealt with the "oh just have one!", "are you pregnant?", "don't be so boring!" Type comments?

Also can’t reccomend enough just holding a glass of wine/whatever. Start with a small one and let people top you up until it gets full then say you’re still going. Then abandon it when it ‘gets to warm’ and start again.

Sounds like your sister has alcohol issues - would definitely avoid drinking with her.

I've been teetotal since jan 2017 and love it, don't miss drinking at all. When I first gave up and got comments I just said I was on a health kick, which was true and people generally accepted it.

Then I got pregnant so no-one said anything then. Now I'm breastfeeding so again people generally don't say anything (although I get the odd comment and once got a bottle of baileys as a Xmas gift).

I always assumed once I stop breastfeeding that I'd start drinking again but I'm now honestly considering just continuing being teetotal. I'm way past the stage of missing having a drink, it saves money and I feel healthier! Sorry that that wasn't of much help with how to deal with comments, just thought I'd share a positive teetotal experience.

I’m tee total. Best decision I ever made and I enjoy parties and nights out a million times more now!

It’s really hard, alcohol is ingrained in our culture. The only time I’ve been pretty much teetotal was when I was pregnant - no pressure to drink then of course!

Most celebrations involve drinking, food tends to be paired with wine, after work drink on a Friday etc. I usually do dry January and just extend past the end of January until I have an event that involves drinking.

(although I get the odd comment and once got a bottle of baileys as a Xmas gift).

We get alcohol as gifts all the time despite the fact I don't drink at all and DH very rarely (and never wine). Anything really nice gets regifted. It doesn't seem to matter how long it's been, people just buy wine out of habit I think and forget we don't drink the stuff. Again it makes you realise how much alcohol is an ingrained part of our culture that people just can't get their heads around someone not partaking.

My dad and his parents were notorious local pissheads too. I rarely drink, pretty much teetotal. I get angry if people keep trying to force drink on me - how dare they not respect what ive very clearly said? This helps me keep saying no.

I have been teetotal for almost 20 years due to a knackered liver. On nights out I will often drink a tall glass drink like soda and lime with ice. People who know me well know why I don't drink and never question it. if someone asks "what are you drinking" I say what I want. If they come back with "wouldn't you prefer a beer/wine etc" then I say "no, I have a health issue and don't drink alcohol" no one asks what this is because they all take it that its not a choice its a requirement. Don't feel the need to explain to anyone just say " I don't drink due to a health issue" and keep it simple with no other explanations.

I sometimes miss it but I definitely don't miss the effect even a small amount has.

The fact that it seems such a momentous thing, to stop drinking alcohol, shows what a messed up relationship our society has with it!

This. Absolutely this.

I’m currently pregnant with dc2 so have an excuse for not drinking. However was never a massive drinker before. Although did tend on occasion to go a bit wild. Same as you op - bit of a funny relationship with wine.

I just can’t take the hungover feeling anymore. Even a couple of glasses of wine combined with toddler wrangling the next morning makes me feel awful.