To want a new engagement ring?

[journeysendwhenloversmeet]

Hello all. This issue is causing big problems between me and DP and would love some perspective.
I have been with DP for ten years and we became engaged six years ago but with buying a house and career changes actually getting married was put on the back burner.
Eight months ago I found out DH was having an emotional affair with someone he works with. He claimed at the time (and still does) that it was never physical but he cared deeply about the OW. I’ll admit I’m not 100% convinced having seen the messages between them.
We broke up for six weeks but I eventually forgave him and he moved back into our house. I removed my ring when he moved out but now he is asking me to wear it again so we can once again be engaged. However I cannot look at the original ring without remembering the awful night I took it off thinking my relationship was over forever. Without thinking about him texting another woman his deepest secrets. It makes my stomach churn.
So here is my AIBU, should he buy me a new ring? To reinstate his dedication to me? As any apology for all the hurt he caused? It doesn’t have to be expensive. Just different!

off topic but what happened with the OW? in the 6 weeks you were apart did they get together? do they still work together?

What you’re really asking for is proof that he’s still invested in the relationship. If he buys you an expensive new ring you won’t feel any better about everything that’s happened. It sounds like you need time to decide if you can trust him again, and if you can forgive him. I know you say you’ve forgiven him but it really doesn’t sound like you have, and that’s ok, a betrayal like that is not something you just get over. Whilst you’re figuring it all out, the engagement should be on the back burner. So no, you shouldn’t ask for a new ring, at least not right now. And I’m sorry, you deserve better

Get rid of him and the ring

Definitely force the issue and insist on a new ring, to go with his renewed commitment.

While you’re at the jewellers, get some ideas for earrings, necklaces and bracelets that would match your new ring. You know, for the next few times his eye and his willy wander off...

Guys like yours can be quite lucrative when it comes to jewellery collections. Maybe don’t pick out an eternity ring, that could be too ironic.

Seriously, value yourself a bit more highly and send this weak man on his way. Clear the path for someone who knows how love works to come into your life.

I never had an engagement ring. We were married within 2 months of him asking. It's not the ring that's important, it's the intention. A new ring will change nothing. If you can't bear to look at it then sell it and just don't have one.

Why would you still want to commit the rest of your life to someone who can do that to you?

What’s the point of an engagement ring when you’re not married six years after starting to wear one?

Bin him and the ring.

Wouldn't you just look at the new ring and think " and this is the new ring I got because he cheated"?

Agree with pp- the ring shouldn't be what you're focusing on.

Stop ignoring the elephant in the room. It's not the ring! If your love is strong enough, the ring could be a ring pull !

The ring doesn’t make your stomach churn and isn’t the problem here. It reminds you that he has betrayed your trust. Will a new ring really get rid of that feeling, like magic?