Dp and stag do!

[NotReadyForThisX2]

Dp is out for friends stag do, pretty popular pub run and they started early. He sent me a text firstly asking me to phone him and say I needed him home for Ds or something important, I said no. Now he's just text to say can I go pick him up from x place but not to tell anyone.
He's obviously had enough and wants to sneak off or have an excuse to go rather than just saying I've had enough lads I'm off home.

So am I unreasonable to not help him out? I did warn him when he set off to pace himself and not over do it in the first few pubs, but he's only about half way at the moment 😂

Yes his friend is here with him @noeyedeer. He's got his own food, I imagine Dp paid for ours though.

Good stuff! Well done to your DP getting him home safe. Reminisces about doing the Otley Run

They never finished it @noeyedeer. Some of the group stayed in the skyrack as they got talking to a group of women a few went to the next pub but then couldn't be bothered walking to the one after, that's when Dp and his mate got a taxi.

He owes me £10 because I knew he wouldn't finish it. Which is pointless as we have a joint account, but still.

i wish my dh came home by 8pm after a pub crawl

I can't wrap my head around you not helping him because you thought he should stay out. I would be seriously questioning a relationship where the other person didn't support me fully. You do, as a pp suggested, sound rather childish.

Enjoy the notional £10 @NotReadyForThisX2 !

He left the house at 11am @GabsAlot.

Because I didn't need to help him @englishdictionary. If he really wanted to he could have said NotReady just phoned and I need to head home. I know him he was feeling fed up but he wouldn't have actually come home without his mate. I've mentioned a few times it was only lighthearted. If he phoned and said I really want collecting please come, or something of course I'd go get him.

I'd say pick him up but not the fake call! Imagine if it was the other way round and he decided not to pick you up when you had had too much! Also I am slightly jealous as wish my husband knew his limits!

And it's something we've joked about since he organised it for the stag do. I kept saying why would you organise something you won't do. He'd even said yesterday if I phone wanting to come home, tell me not to quit.

But it wasn't me not supporting him, it was me saying you've made your bed, but only in a joking way. I could tell from his messages that he wasn't ridiculously drunk, that he wasn't trying to get out of anything else he didn't want to do. He'd just got to his dressing gown and slippers moment, where he'd rather be home on the sofa.

I agree with you, OP. He’s a grown man, he needs to take responsibility for pacing his own drinks, and going home from a social occasion without someone else providing an excuse/acting as the fun police. It’s exactly this kind of spinelessness that ends in grown adults claiming they were coerced into a lap dance, as they ‘couldn’t say no’.

Just go and get him, we all need to be saved sometimes who cares if he’s using you as an excuse.

You can maintain all you like that it's lighthearted, but he asked you for a get out and you were not there for him. Because you decided he didn't deserve/need it.

Partnerships are about being there, supporting and helping each other. You didn't do that.

He’s a grown man, he needs to take responsibility for pacing his own drinks, and going home from a social occasion without someone else providing an excuse/acting as the fun police

Disagree with this completely. It's really common for people to use others as a get out. You ask and they help. Lots of people do it on dates, nights out, crappy work things. It doesn't mean they are not taking responsibility, in fact asking someone for a get out in a social situation like that IS being responsible.

Fair enough @englishdictionary it might come across like that. But it wasn't about not supporting him and Dp doesn't see it that way. He wouldn't have come home without the groom anyway.

I have no idea what the point in the post was then. You literally asked the question.

yep my dh can do that and stay out till gone 11pm

Tbf @GabsAlot. We've both had our share of those days/nights. He's just never been keen, even in his uni days he's always been one of the first home.
He's even got up with Ds this morning.

well good on him i say

He's quite good @GabsAlot.

Most of the others didn't get in until after 2am! Including Dp's brother and the grooms dad.
Dp said he's going fishing for his stag do, not with friends or anything just him. He said he might invite my grandad 😂