AIBU to literally want to kill this fucker?

[Boomsk]

It's a fly.
A small fly. Not quite a midget, but not a big fully grown fly
It's like a teen-aged sized fly? Maybe a tween?

BUT FUCK ME IT IS SO ANNOYING.

AIBU to want to kill it? I don't like killing things But this thing is annoying me (I do kill spiders though - no ethics about those).

Oh no bees are good

Is your MIL alive? Has she reincarnated as a fly?

Well, I think it's gone now. Yikes. I think the spray is maybe a peaceful death?

As peaceful as having your insides boiled alive and snotting your brain through your nose ever is, yes.

Yeah that fly died happy

This post reminds me of a magic trick I used to do as a kid. I would catch a fly and put it in some Tupperware I the freezer. They go into hibernation within minutes and you can then take it out , put it on your hand and do wizzacavaaaa hocus pocus over it and it comes back to life with the warmth of your hand then flies off. It can really freak people out !

Flies have noses?

Like Keanu.

Yeah they do. And tits.

MIL alive and kicking and is armed with a swat at all times. She actually sits at the side of the fire (she's disabled with walking), literally with a swat at her right hand all the time lol.

That would be ex MIL.
No other MILs lurking about. Dead or otherwise.
I think the tweenie fly is dead. And now I've taken into a fit of sneezing.

My daughter has reptiles 😒 and consequently has a cricket farm (don’t even)
She often puts them in the fridge to make them sluggish.
Really helps my dieting

Oh dear - I think I might brutally murder them with a swat then! I didn't know they died painfully?

Thank fuck my daughter liked Sylvanian families.

Tweens/teens ARE annoying, it's a fact OP! Maybe consider banning its electronic devices if it doesn't cut out these behaviours immediately? It's clearly pushing the boundaries, and now's the time to draw the line.

The fly is gone. My teen on the other hand chose to go NC with me (didn't realise it was a concept known to 14 year olds) when I threatened to remove her ipad. Now we text. That's our only communication. You would not believe how appalled she is at my behaviour!! In any case, I receive minimal communication maybe once a month. Just to check I'm alive or something. This is usually 'Hi - so I heard you were sick. Hope your cool now.'.

I think we're doing good.

You wouldn't have the problem with the Fecally Festooned Flying Fuckers if you left the spiders alone now, would you?

Boomsk that took a dark turn
Are you being serious?

Sorta. My teen doesn't talk to me. I'm annoying apparently. (I accept that).

I can't zap her like the fly.

She hates me.

All is good in the hood.

Some day she will forgive me for being her Mum. Not for a few years though I suspect.

Doesn't really help that my dsis keeps telling me that the reason we're at war is because we're the exact same apparently.

Dd is more stubborn than me.

I think all mums are annoying, it’s our job

I'm not at all stubborn. I wouldn't usually even hurt a fly!

DD is as stubborn as a mule.

DD confides in my dsis and doesn't like me having authority over her at all apparently - because I know nothing. In fairness to her - she never did like being parented lol. Half the time I think she thought she was the boss of me!

Oh I hate it when people say ‘the trouble with you is that you’re as bad as each other ‘
Not helpful
If she’s 14 , have you tried finding a common ground? You know, something you can do together or talk about?

I don't see how we're the exact same at all!

Ye - we've found common ground - as far away from me as she can get lol

I think she just needs to explore who she is without me behind her. And she's navigating her teens quite well I think, though PMT does seem to be a massive factor for her. I've almost resigned from jobs as a result of PMT!
But she won't discuss any of it and that's ok. Because I'm an idiot who knows nothing and came out at the same time as dinosaurs.