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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel annoyed that friend didnt text back tonight.....

22 replies

Overseasmom100 · 04/05/2019 23:23

Invited to friends for bbq today. I bought beautiful florist flowers for her plus bought foid to take. 4 hours before get message prob cancel due to weather till tomorrow. Told we cant go tomorrow as plans made but it'll be fine worse case shove it in the oven. Response was ok let me check with OH and get back to you. Nothing. No texr nothing. DS was upset as he was looking forward to hanging out with friends DS.

My DS just said XX is round their I can see it on his location.

Annoyed as she didnt let me know, bought flowers and food...spent quite alot. Plus sounds like some people did go round.

OP posts:
Pipandmum · 04/05/2019 23:29

Well you don’t really know. Why didn’t you just call her closer to the time to ask if it was still on? I always hate it when I make a big effort for a dinner party and people drop out last minute - but never had a situation where I was told an occasion might not go ahead and then it did without me. Don’t second guess just ask!

Fiveredbricks · 04/05/2019 23:30

Why didnt you chase her up or just go around?

Leeds2 · 04/05/2019 23:31

She may still be having the BBQ tomorrow, just some people turned up early. I wouldn't worry about it.

Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 04/05/2019 23:33

Because she invited us she said she would advise. I think she had a better offer....happened before. Im done with her...very rude.

OP posts:
Greeborising · 04/05/2019 23:33

Why don’t people speak to each other anymore?

Greeborising · 04/05/2019 23:34

Friends who change plans because of a better offer are not friends

SweetMarmalade · 04/05/2019 23:38

Well, as it’s a better day tomorrow I’d text in the morning stating that it looks like a better day today, lots of food here bought for cancelled bbq yesterday, are we still on??

Walnutwhipster · 04/05/2019 23:38

Is it possible the others who turned up didn't get their messages saying it might be cancelled so she was suddenly faced with them and forgot to text you?

SweetMarmalade · 04/05/2019 23:40

But to answer you your AIBU question, no you’re not.

Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 04/05/2019 23:46

I ferl used by this so called friend always at her beck and call when she needs someone to speak to over various things. Perhaps Im just disappointed and abit over sensative

OP posts:
Doyouavocado · 04/05/2019 23:51

This is really hard to read

Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 04/05/2019 23:54

Why? She loves over 60 miles from me and I go to see her all the time. Have lent her money recently plus cat sit. Think I just feel let down

OP posts:
Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 04/05/2019 23:54

Lives

OP posts:
FoxSquadKitten · 04/05/2019 23:55

Well I'd be annoyed too tbh. But maybe she just forgot to ring you back after checking with her DH?

RussellSprout · 05/05/2019 00:01

It's rude and thoughtless. Is she usually dizzy?

Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 05/05/2019 00:03

Well we cant go tomorrow as we are off on holiday which she knows so perhaps wait till I come back to chat to her about it. Plus Im supposed to be bringing her perfume back!!!

OP posts:
RussellSprout · 05/05/2019 00:05

Ooops you might accidentally 'forget ' the perfume eh?

Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 05/05/2019 00:10

I wont do that...we always buy each other gifts. Seeing her in a few weeks as were on a training course together so will mention it or probs not. Known each other since high school so not worth loosing a friend

OP posts:
MyKingdomForBrie · 05/05/2019 00:12

Well by the sounds of it she was trying to cancel you and you tried to still come over, so she fobbed you off. Clearly she wanted the bbq with different friends instead. I would surmise she is not very nice and length of friendship does not make up for lack of respect/care.

SummerPlace · 05/05/2019 00:36

You were going to travel 60 miles there and 60 miles back to go to a barbecue? And go on a holiday the next day?

All I can say is that I admire both your stamina and your enthusiasm.

Original poster
Overseasmom100 · 05/05/2019 00:54

Meant 60 miles round trip. 30 miles there 40mins there and 30 back etc..

OP posts:
kateandme · 05/05/2019 08:45

by not talking to her about it will it really help.your obviously bothered and its building the resentment in you whcih will blow.
if shes a friend like you said then this is the exact thing you talk to eachother about.

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