Advice for DD - AIBU to get involved

[medusa83]

My DD will be 13 soon. She wants to go for a meal with her friendship group.

Last year she made friends with a lovely group, however they fell out.

She is now "friends" with another group, however I'm not sure that they like her. Apparently there is a group chat which they don't want to add her to. She has specifically asked but been told that some don't want to add her. Another friend had a party and only invited people on this group chat.

Invites have only ever gone one way. She has never been invited to anything that this group do. Not that I am aware that they do much together anyway.

WWYD? She seems unaware that this group might not actually like her. I feel really sorry for her. I really struggled socially in secondary school and felt self-conscious and awful all the time...so perhaps my advice would be rubbish. She is a little bit on the spectrum FYI.

Just looking for constructive advice please.

Meant to add to that, sorry to derail OP.

good point takethebuscuit, it may be a confidentiality issue about the groupchat, and not an indication that some girls don't like dd. (A good example of how dparents can't always interpret the signals well either!) Though the party for groupchat members only (ie not this dd) takes that one level higher.

Op longer term, you say the school has agreed about dd having issues - have they made any suggestions/offered any help? Are there any school clubs/societies they could suggest where dd could meet some like minded students, also super enthusiastic and focused on facts?!

Make sure you clarify who is paying for the meals. If your dd is already slightly on the edge of a social group you don't want to have an awkward situation if you are expecting people to pay for their own and they think you are paying. This is the sort of age when they move to meeting up with friends and pay individually but with official invites it may be assumed you are paying.