to not have furniture (according to my mother - I dispute this claim!)

[QOFE]

We have a kitchen with a large table and dining chairs which we eat/draw/do homework/play playdoh round, and obviously we all have beds. Teenager has a desk with chair for work as do I, plus we all have bookshelves and Kallax type storage units aplenty.

What we don't have, is expensive soft furnishings. Our living room (which is also my workroom, for which I need clear floor space during the week) has a comfy corner with loads of big floor cushions and a beanbag. One smallish TV that sits on a wooden stand (cheapy IKEA one). One nice plain coffee table that we sometimes eat at, sat on cushions on the floor. No sofa/settee/couch (see, I don't even know what to call one) and no armchairs. We lounge around on the floor and make cushion nests instead.

According to my mother this means we "don't have any furniture" and therefore frightfully bohemian and peculiar. I disagree and think we have plenty of furniture

There are chairs to sit on if her DM doesn’t want to sit on the floor and it sounds like it’s not a visitors room anyway. Why should Op pay for expensive furniture she doesn’t want??

Years ago when we were childless and then when the dc were babiestoddlers we never bothered with a sofa for the similar reasons as you. We moved around and they are expensive. We just used beanbags.

Now I'm older I couldn't imagine not having a sofa. I don't want to be sitting on the floor and don't want to get down low to do so, uncomfortable. I think that is what your mother is referring to.

Are the kitchen chairs comfortable to sit at for lengthy periods when she visits?

And how old are you?

Owl On not having a TV, do you find that as soon as you tell people this in RL, they've always got one you can have? Of course, if you said you had no money, they'd stay tight-lipped but say you've no telly and it's 'Oh you poor thing, I've got one you can have, no really, take it!'

QOFE The only person whose approval matters is you and your cushion nests sound fab!

How could a sofa be any more difficult to move house with than a bed? And if you move house a lot, you surely can’t always have had an upstairs living room.

I don’t think it’s bohemian just weird and uncomfortable but it’s your house.

We have a sofa on our attic floor, I don’t recall any major issue getting it up there. How do you think people cope in flats?

It’s traditional in France and Spain.

Don’t buy something you don’t need.

Far too spartan for me. Cushions on the floor instead of a sofa and some armchairs sounds a bit bleak.

It’s not traditional in Spain

I lived in France and I’ve never been to a house that didn’t have a sofa.

Sorry I missed the part you said you were 40. I'm younger than you but must be aging badly
Don't think I've been able to sit comfortably on the floor since my mid 30s which fortunately coincided with my dc growing older and not needing to sit on the floor to play with them!

I have very comfortable kitchen chairs where we sit if we have friends around, also on the sofa. Ask your mum if she's uncomfortable on your kitchen chairs and if she is then see if you can find something a bit more comfortable for her.

It's your house, don't be dictated to you choose your own furnishings and pick things you are comfortable with. Would your mother throw her sofa out if you told her you wanted to sit on the floor, I don't think so. I'm 59 and still love sitting on the floor and often do, I do have a sofa and quite happily sit on that to.

Super odd. I bet your kids would prefer one.

I think “making cushion nests” on the floor sounds gruesome. Very toddler like.

Of course it's unusual not to have a sofa or some armchairs. That doesn't mean you should have them just that you know it's not the norm.

And I've never been anywhere in France or Spain that didn't have a sofa and/or armchairs.

Given that your mother is probably the high side of 40, if not 50, then she might be expressing, in a very roundabout way, her dismay that there is nothing for her to sit on when she does visit.
I am over 50 now and find sitting on the floor a lot harder than it used to be, to say nothing of getting up again!

Your set up might suit you and your DC, but it's not great for older visitors.

Should have read more - your mother is clearly a lot older than 40s/50s, so I totally understand her issues!

And yes, I was fine on the floor at 40, and even 45 - but now? no.

Sounds more comfortable than my MIL's house. She has lots of tiny chairs she thinks are antiques (I think they were made when people were smaller and wore corsets so sat bolt upright all the time) plus a couple of normal sized ones we aren't allowed to sit on because she's been reupholstering them for a decade or so, so they have no covers.

We sit on the floor propping ourselves up on the furniture. And don't visit very often...

If you can’t afford a sofa it’s not weird, if you can then it is. I would be a little weirded out having to sit in a nest of pillows at a family members house. I would also have trouble standing up after.

Very very odd to not have a sofa or armchairs. Ugh I’d hate going to a friends house without a couch.

I’ve lived without a sofa and I’ve lived with a sofa. I think life with a sofa is better.

My SIL never used to have a sofa. They had a couple of library chairs but when we stayed we tended to sit in dining room. A little unusual but fine and her choice. We put it down to her living in Redland Green and having a worm composter. She ate lentils before they were a thing. Very Bristol ecologentsia.

Unless you never visit anyone else and have no clue of furniture options. Then uou know this is unusual. And pretending you don't even know what to call a sofa. They are so alien to you is just silly.

Cmon. 🤣

No sofas and laying on cushions is very poor student like.

My parents got rid of their sofa and replaced it with two ikea Poang chars. If we were all there someone had to sit on the floor. I hated visiting because there was nowhere to sit and it felt so unwelcoming to other visitors. Fortunately they saw the light and bought another sofa!