to be irritated and a little sad...

[resipsa]

that DH is supposed to be having a TOIL day but instead has been holed up in his home office since the kids came home from school, having spent the day preparing for his next trip? He went on an overseas work trip from last Saturday to Wednesday and is off again on Saturday for nine days. He was in London until late on Thursday. He saw the kids after school on Wednesday. That's pretty much it for, what, 2 weeks (inc BH weekend). I know work is important (I work too) but feel really sad about the fact he clearly isn't bothered...

Gosh, sorry for the delay in returning - last time I looked there were only 2 posts and 1 was more me.
Amused by the idea that I might 'luxuriate' in his salary as if my own is not luxury enough.
Some PPs were spot on - there comes a point where work must take a back seat, however 'important' you perceive yours to be. His answer is always 'there's nothing I can do' but of course that is not quite right. It really means there is nothing he wants to do ☹️.

And yes, the Saturday departure is to Hong Kong and arranged, apparently, to benefit me as going this week means I won't have to cut short my usual working day (as I normally have to if he's away to deal with childcare both ends) on Monday as it's a holiday. So thoughtful 🙄.

Its not time off if hes working in which case either he is owed wages or further time off. Either his employer is taking advantage or you need a serious discussion regarding his priorities.

I'm assuming he didn't talk to you first about which day was best to go?

Yes, this is what I was getting at with my earlier post about how much he tells you about what is going on at work and involves you in the detail.

No - I get told but after it's fixed at which point it is 'sold' to me as being in my interests - and there is never a way to change it - 'there's nothing I can do'!
And don't get me started on the departure later in the year which just happens to be on my birthday. Furious as he apparently was, there was also 'nothing I can do'!!!

But does he tell you much about his work generally?

Endlessly, unfortunately. I understand that some things cannot be changed but also know that they definitely will never be changed if you never ask for them to be. He is the ultimate 'yes' man when it comes to work!
Anyway, some things have happened to friends today which puts my gripe in perspective so thanks everyone for your input but I am parking this one for now (until the next trip at the end of May!).