AIBU To not want to have a relationship with my husbands mother.

[RespectfullyNo]

I know I have a lot of good reasons not to. It has been so mind consuming stressful and agitating for 15 years. My husband is not a mothers boy but for some bonding obsession, could be my only thought, is blinded by and has a longing for his mother’s attention and exception. This woman has disrespected not only him but our children and I as well. I am a mother so I can understand the attachment but his attachment from what I and the rest of his family has always been his grandmother. While by his own admission and my own eyes through the whole time we were together she has done so much to neglect him betrayed trust and sabotage our relationship from go. She has even on more than one occasion stated that she disowned him over childish issues and plays favorites between him and siblings. She is a shifty person and says degrading thing about my children. It would be a book as I should write just to revert the anger I have in reminiscing her presence in my life. A person like this, aibu to insist that she be denounce in our life.

What does your husband have to say about it? He’s the only one with the right to disown his mother; if he doesn’t want to you there’s nothing you can do about it.

This is a question?

says degrading thing about my children

That's the salient fact. He can have a relationship with her if he wants but if she causes harm to your children, I'd be fine not seeing her and not facilitating a relationship.

You don't have to have her in your life, if she is abusive towards your kids, you have the right to protect them from that. He is entitled to keep his mother on as his problem but he has no right to demand any investment towards her from you.

You don’t have to have a relationship with anyone you don’t wish to engage with. DH on the other hand has the right and ability to maintain a relationship with his mother and facilitate his children’s relationship with their grandmother. You have no legal right to prevent this from happening.

Be careful you don’t cut your nose off to spite your face.

I agree. I don't have a relationship with her. The main thing is if he doesn't respect my feelings enough not to have the children around a person that will affect them negatively. The only other hand I see is our children seeing her for who she truly is. I don't stop him from seeing her. She asks him to cut her yard🤨🙄so they speak occasionally. Tahbk you for you alls feed back though.