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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To consider a term-time holiday

247 replies

ScatteredMama82 · 02/05/2019 16:00

So I'm looking at prices of flights for February half-term next year to go skiing in Germany. For a family of 4 it's £1300 just for flights in half-term. For a different week it's £280! It's just a crazy amount of money. We love skiing, and are just getting back into it now that DS2 is old enough (he's 4). DS1 is 9 (will be Yr 5 next year). I think we're going to go in term-time. We did it this year, and it got approved by the school as DH is military and had been away all summer so we didn't get a family holiday. We won't have that excuse this time though (unless he gets sent away between now and February which is unlikely in his current role).

Would you do it?

OP posts:
Original poster
ScatteredMama82 · 02/05/2019 16:41

@poptartpoptart

@ScatteredMama82 yes teachers choose that profession, and a good thing they do - so our children can receive a free education!
Teachers work extremely hard and it is unfair that they have extra work put on them in order to catch children up who have missed school to go on holiday.
The fact that you only get 5 weeks holiday a year and your children get 13 has nothing to do with it. School isn’t childcare! You can coincide your family holiday in the school holidays like millions of other people do.
Taking children out of school sends all the wrong messages imo. It teaches them that is ok to break rules to suit yourself. We tell children that school and getting an education is important but then we contradict that by saying it is ok to miss school in favour of a holiday.

I don't expect the teacher to do anything extra to catch my children up. We took spellings, reading and maths with us when we went last time and I did some work with him in the evenings each day.

I hear what you're saying about rule-breaking and wrong messages, but I also think it's about family time being important (in our situation), sports, fresh air, different language and culture and experiencing all that while also making an effort to keep up with their schoolwork. I don't think that's setting a terrible example.

OP posts:
Drogosnextwife · 02/05/2019 16:42

We sometimes take a week before Christmas aswell. My kids education hasn't suffered for it.

ILiveInSalemsLot · 02/05/2019 16:42

I’d go too. It’s great to have that family time together if you can.

Charmatt · 02/05/2019 16:42

So teachers shouldn't go away in term-time because they chose that profession.....

....yet you chose to have children who are expected to be in school (compulsory education) in term-time, but it's ok for them to take a holiday then????

If even a small proportion of families take their children out of school for a week for a holiday, it can quickly take average attendance down to below 96%. If Ofsted inspect a school with attendance below 96%, it can affect their rating.....

......however, I'm sure the parents who take their children away in term-time will not see that they have contributed to that poorer rating, when it happens.

mpsw · 02/05/2019 16:43

The military covenant does specify that forces DC can be authorised holidays to coincide with end of tour leave. Nothing beyond that, so it's already been quite a concession that you got the earlier holiday authorised (lots of families of seasonal workers, especially in hospitality sector, cannot take peak time holidays either).

Forces DC also attract pupil premium because, as a population, they underperform at school. I would be quite wary of adding another factor that lowers performance (termtime absence) unless it was absolutely necessary.

I would see this as highly desirable, for the cheaper price, but not necessary

ForalltheSaints · 02/05/2019 16:44

It is a skiing holiday. This is not in my view a good enough reason to miss school.

If it were to visit a relative a long way away who could not travel to you at all (elderly, infirm, very ill) then that in my opinion is reasonable. Perhaps for some cultural event or religious celebration that is only ever in term-time (though even then you could wait until school is finished).

I'm not in favour of fines as a sanction but would understand if you received one. (I'd have passports withdrawn for a period of time, or have those who did not do this be front of the queue for secondary school places).

Monkeyssplit · 02/05/2019 16:44

I wouldn't do it. We don't even get fined here if we go on term time holidays. If someone suggested we go on a holiday during term time I would look at my diary and think 'oh shame, we CAN'T go as the kids are at school. Those dates don't coincide with their holidays.'
Term time holidays save people money but they disrupt the whole class. The teacher either doesn't reach anything new whilst the child is away or has to spend time taking the child through everything the rest of the class learnt whilst they were away. The brighter the child the less the disruption. The less able the child the greater the disruption. I think it is rude as it wastes other people's time, the teacher's and the other pupils'.

multivac · 02/05/2019 16:44

NB - it's not a 'fine', it's a 'fixed penalty notice' (like those you get for speeding). You pay it to avoid being prosecuted.

trilbydoll · 02/05/2019 16:44

If you work though, taking a week in termtime just creates another week of school holidays to find childcare for! Unless you have free childcare, that probably needs factoring in to the calculation.

I would consider it if one of us was a SAHP but we are already juggling holiday and I couldn't face adding more days to the chaos when I didn't have to.

Jojobythesea · 02/05/2019 16:44

I would do it and did do it every year until my eldest started secondary. Both have got into the local grammar so it hasn't hurt their education too much!! Lots of memories are made on family holidays especially as we all work so much now.

cantpissinpeace · 02/05/2019 16:44

Do it and say they are ill

ForalltheSaints · 02/05/2019 16:45

The military covenant is the one reasonable exception.

Bumsnet69 · 02/05/2019 16:45

The obsession with attendance levels in primary school is ludicrous these days. What you’re suggesting sounds reasonable. I would do it.

Lifecraft · 02/05/2019 16:45

Life is short. In 10 years they'll have fond memories of the trip. Especially the older one.

Yes, I'm sure that when they end up in a dead end job because they failed their exams as their parents thought holidays were more important than their education, they can think about their skiing trip whilst they stuff pickled onions into a jar on the factory line.

dreichuplands · 02/05/2019 16:45

DC receive a free at the point of delivery education, we pay for it out of taxation.
Having had our dc in a mixture of state and private education, I have noticed the much longer private holiday combined with a much more relaxed approach to time out of school mean that holidays aren't crazy expensive for parents in the private system which doesn't seem particularly fair.

lazylinguist · 02/05/2019 16:46

no, I wouldn't be happy with the teacher doing it but they choose that job. I only get 5 weeks holiday a year, so the fact that my children get 13 doesn't help really does it.

You chose to do a job that only has 5 weeks holiday a year. You chose to have children.

I wouldn't do it. Not because of fines or fear of my dc falling behind, but because it's not an example I want to set them tbh.

Dc: I don't want to go to school today, mummy!
Mum: But it's really important for you to go to school and have an education. Some children in deprived countries don't even have a school to go to, you know!
Dc: So how come we were allowed a whole week off to go to Disneyland.
Mum: Ummm.... because it saved mummy and daddy some money so we could go on a better holiday than all the rule-following fools who don't take their children on holiday in school time.
Dc: Cool!

dreichuplands · 02/05/2019 16:47

In addition the dc's school took them on a skiing trip during term time this year.

Drogosnextwife · 02/05/2019 16:48

yes teachers choose that profession, and a good thing they do - so our children can receive a free education!
Teachers work extremely hard and it is unfair that they have extra work put on them in order to catch children up who have missed school to go on holiday.
The fact that you only get 5 weeks holiday a year and your children get 13 has nothing to do with it. School isn’t childcare! You can coincide your family holiday in the school holidays like millions of other people do.
Taking children out of school sends all the wrong messages imo. It teaches them that is ok to break rules to suit yourself. We tell children that school and getting an education is important but then we contradict that by saying it is ok to miss school in favour of a holiday

What a load of old tripe. My kids teachers didn't catch them up on anything when they went back to school.
What about people that can't afford to go on holiday during school holidays? Should these children never experience family holidays?

EleanorLavish · 02/05/2019 16:49

Lifecraft missing a few days of school will not lead to a lifetime of dead end jobs. Not unless the teacher or school is totally shite.
What about if the kid gets sick for a few days? Are they condemned to a life of min wage jobs??

MirriVan · 02/05/2019 16:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

iluvsummer · 02/05/2019 16:50

If you don’t want to pull them out of school then check to see if there are any local authorities that have different term times to you. I did this in February and saved £1200 on flights by flying from Birmingham instead of Cardiff as Birmingham had their half term a week before Wales.

DeftandGlory · 02/05/2019 16:51

Lifecraft Horrible snobby comment.

a) someone has to do the less glamorous jobs. It’s not a reflection on your worth as a person.
b) families that prioristise skiing aren’t the families who don’t expect their children to do well in my experience.
c)Skiing promotes all those soft skills schools are trying to foster; health, fitness, challenging yourself,etc.

Go Op. The councils may have different rules next year anyway.

floraloctopus · 02/05/2019 16:54

@PoptartPoptart no, I wouldn't be happy with the teacher doing it but they choose that job. I only get 5 weeks holiday a year, so the fact that my children get 13 doesn't help really does it. They can't go on their own!

You chose to have children and you chose to send them to school so you are no different to the teacher in that regard. When you choose to have children you accept that they either go to school or you home educate them.

MirriVan · 02/05/2019 16:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WeTookVows · 02/05/2019 16:55

Drogosnextwife we've been on holidays in school holidays that have cost under £280, which OP suggests is the cost for the flights alone. For OP it's really not that sort of situation (no holiday vs term time holiday). It would be a different type of holiday though, for sure.

There are ways to have cheap holidays, staycations, brilliant free or inexpensive days out, using random INSET days as an opportunity for a weekend away, staying with friends. A Premier Inn on a Sunday night can often be picked up for £29, school holiday or not. Cheap skiing holidays and queue-busting trips to Disneyland are not a human right. If you opt in to the state school system you play by the rules.

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