To think ‘Flexitarian’ isn’t hypocritical?

[MotherOfDragons90]

My DH and I have been gradually phasing meat out of our daily lives. For environmental and financial reasons. I’m not finding it difficult to not eat meat day to day, but I refuse to cut it out completely. I will still enjoy a cheeseburger at bonfire night, roast lamb at MILs on the odd Sunday and a nice steak on our anniversary.

I said to my DSis today (who is a full vegetarian) that I think our balance works well and if everyone did the same it actually might make a difference environmentally, and for animals. She is adamant that it makes no difference and I’m just a hypocrite who may as well eat meat all the time.

It’s really got my back up because I feel like I’m genuinely doing my bit and she’s just stamped all over it! Am I being a hypocrite?!

The label's wanky but the idea certainly isn't.

Good for you for eating less meat. We still eat some here but we've halved our weekly consumption in the past six months/year despite having two teenagers. We didn't have meat for every meal either. Most of ours is high welfare. It's beef and lamb we really need to reduce at the moment as they produce so much methane. Obviously all meat uses more land to produce the same amount of protein but the 'climate emergency' is clear that the priority is reducing ruminants.

This is a departure from the usual Mumsnet mantra that all vegetarians are hypocrites.

I'm a vegan, and wholeheartedly support reduced meat consumption, but would ask you to consider transitioning to not eating meat at all. It is never ethical.

It would really help my efforts to eat less meat (health, not principles), if restaurants weren't obsessed with bloody cauliflower steak!

My rule on holiday is alcohol or meat, not both. Stops me going crazy in overconsumption.

Tell her that vegetarians are vegans who lack commitment. She's still consuming animal products, albeit she's not eating them.

Your not labelling yourself it’s more of an individual approach

There is no moral high ground to be won

We could all do with eating less meat or ‘dead flesh’ as it were

Your doing well - your sister should get off her high horse!

It's the label that annoys people I think

It’s so much easier these days - loads of veggie/vegan options in cafes, restaurants etc - we also don’t ‘need’ meat every day so makes total sense to cut right back. I don’t eat meat now but do have occasional fish if stuck - so far feel good on it not weak from lack of iron or anything

you are just cutting down. Don't tell anyone you are being vegetarian, because you aren't.

We cut down on red meat after BSE., We eat far less beef than we used to. Not vegetarian though.

Most people I know don't eat meat everyday. That's just the norm I think. Mostly because of cost and not some conscious effort to do good things and make a difference. I probably have red meat about 4 times a month, bacon once a month. Chicken and fish more frequently. Lots of veggie days if you call pasta or baked potato veggie.

I’ve seen a similar reaction, it’s weird

I think it depends on whether you expect others to cater for you as veggie.

I have a friend who expects to be catered for as a vegan but will sometimes eat cheese, or even e.g. mussels if she's out and especially feels like it. She'll eat jelly babies if she's drink. So I have to try really really hard to cater for her (I have intolerances to beans, chickpeas and lentils so it's a bloody nightmare) but when she chooses to she'll eat none vegan stuff. That gets my back up tbh but I do it anyway because I don't get to decide when someone wants to consume animal products. But I would be aware that if you're doing that it may be irritating people!

'The label's wanky but the idea certainly isn't'.

This. You're doing a good and important thing. (Vegetarian of 25+ years here).

I accidentally bought Aldi Cauliflower sausages a few weeks ago and they were so nice I have been buying them ever since, it’s made me more adventurous with meat free options. I am now aiming to have at least 3 meat free days a week, and maybe will increase it if I find it manageable.

I do find I really do appreciate the meat when I do have it as well

HALF the population eat meat EVERY day

That's a lot of meat

You can’t decide to be veggie today then be seen chomping on steak when it suits. But cutting down is great and being honest about cutting down but not stopping is even better. I call myself veggie when with people I know will try and get me to eat fish (mum- looking at you and your “I’ve done you a nice piece of fish”
But not in any earnest as the reason I don’t eat it is because I don’t like it. I have to say I’m veggie when travelling with work or get stuck with fish again - I dont like that at all
But I have some leather shoes and cook meat for my children so I can’t say I’m veggie

The label's daft but the principle is sound.

I'm a former veggie and happily eat no meat for several days a week. It's better for me and better for the planet than eating meat daily. I don't stick a stupid label on myself though.

It's fine to eat whatever you want, the only problem is when people ask for special food when eating at someone's house etc then snoods they are eating the banned item, or worse the vegan that I specifically catered for who ate the cheesecake because it looked nice and doesn't matter occasionally (I had made a fully vegan dessert just for her, thankfully our friend showed her the door the following week!)

You’re a Reductarian. It’s a growing movement, many people try to reduce their meat intake for health and environmental reasons. Nothing hypocritical about that and of course it makes a difference as you are eating less meat than you would otherwise.

It is a good idea. But why do you feel the need to tell people? Surely you just eat more veggies and less meat at home

And if you are eating at other people's homes, please don't insist on no meat, then go and have a steak the next day. It is so annoying when people impose their dietary requirements on you that they don't keep themselves. I've had that with friends who insisted everthing had to be organic and then had a takeaway the next day.

I guess if your sister isn't supportive then do your own thing & don't tell her about it.

I like the term flexatarian and I am one. If cooking for myself I cook mainly vegan and sometimes vegetarian but I don't demand anything of anyone so if someone cooks me a meal I will eat it.
Even vegan food has ethical implications, the rise in soya bean production and the destruction of habitat is a good example.

If I cook meat for other people I use a local high welfare farm as like a pp I do feel there is a difference. If an animal lives in great surroundings and is slaughtered locally then it is better than intense factory farmed animals

It makes a difference but 'flexitarian' is a nonsensical word that means very little. I can see why as a vegetarian it might get your sister's back up...like you care about animal welfare when it suits you but not enough to commit to a fully vegetarian diet? I'm just guessing here, obviously you know your sister better than we do. Some vegetarians/vegans are horrendously militant about it.

YANBU (and I am a vegetarian). You’re still doing your bit, and it everyone was like you the environmental impact would be huge!

It's not hypocritical, you are doing something. I don't like the labels and how if you aren't doing it 100% you can't use it. I call my diet plant based to avoid it. I eat fish twice a month because I have osteoporosis and I feel that I need the protein. But majority of the time I am vegan.

So you're an omnivore then?

I honestly could never imagine eating a vegetarian or vegan diet. I drink milk (cereal / cups of tea) daily and at least one of my three meals a day is meat based (sandwich for lunch) and sometimes I'll have steak, a burger, or something like brattwurst or salmon in the evening. Of course I'll have lots of fruits and vegetables too but I'll also include things like cheese as well. Basically a balanced healthy diet.

I've had vegetarians in the past tell me I should cut down on meat but the reality is I don't want to, I'm happy eating the diet I eat and I wouldn't dream of lecturing anyone else on what they should or should not cosume.

Takes me back awhile but I remember being in a club and someone who was flurting with me asked me whether the jacket I was wearing was real leather. I told them it was and after that they blanked me, as though that single thing defined my entire personality/being. Like seriously .... get off your high horse.