Opinions please

[chelseamumma]

Ds 14 is at his dads for the weekend and I've just seen pics of his dad on fb at the pub.

What the hell is the point in ds going there if he's being left alone??

Ds is fine with it, he gets Xbox all night

Aibu to be pissed off with this???

I agree with the op a bit here, if dad is only seeing his son every other weekend it’s a bit crap that he can’t just miss the pub for those nights & spend them with his son - he does have loads of other nights he could spend in the pub.

YABVU... He's 14 and doesn't need to spend every single minute with his Dad even if contact is only once every 2 weeks. Teenagers tend not to spend much time 1-2-1 with parents, I know I didn't. I spent most of my teens years either in my room on my laptop or out with friends.You

Op your not being unreasonable at all, contact time is for them to spend together. Doesn't really matter about the age, if he left his son at a younger age (even with supervision) he is not giving his son that time that contact is provided for.
What parent on her seriously would actually say it's ok to not spend time with your child 2 out of the 4 nights you have them a MONTH so you can go to the pub! Anyone who claims that is ok is either talking bullshit or needs to take a really hard look at their parenting!!

Op your son will soon realize that his dad does not value the incredibly small amount of time they have together. You reap what you sow.

Teen is happy so what's the issue though?

OP, I get it. But 14-year-olds don’t really want to spend time with their parents. Deep down of course they do, but he sounds happy. And it’s not really up you you. It’s EDH’s contact time. Until you son is upset by it, it’s not your issue.

Your 14-year-old getting into a state over someone expected knocking on the door is utterly ridiculous though. You’re doing him a disservice.

Sounds like son is happy with the arrangements, maybe he feels like he’s being treated as more mature by being left alone. Sometimes it takes trusting someone to be alone to be closer to them in the long run

YABU. Do you never have any time to yourself when you have him?

Bloody hell is everyone deliberately choosing to ignore the OP’s point? If you do not get to spend your normal day to day life with your child and only get the opportunity once a week or a fortnight or whatever to be with them then why go to the pub in this precious time? The pub will still be there when their child isn’t.

Ifpossible not ignoring at all but disagreeing with it.

It's good for the child to know his father trusts him to act maturely and responsibly - that's as good for their relationship as spending time together and I doubt it was for any length of time.

Quite honestly it was weird op was checking up/stalking anyway.