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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is this a terrible birthday present?

96 replies

Frazzels · 27/04/2019 20:06

I'm thinking of decorating DS's bedroom for his 8th birthday. He's not asked for anything in particular this year but a few months ago he got his own bedroom and no longer has to share with his little sister. We haven't done much with the bedroom yet just kind of shoved everything from his old bedroom in there when we moved and his old room wasn't too nice either so it's a bit of a mess. I was thinking of redoing the whole bedroom perhaps into a football theme as he loves football and having as his main birthday present, possibly as a surprise. Is this an odd birthday present?

OP posts:
bobstersmum · 27/04/2019 21:05

Any of my dc would be immensely excited to have a surprise room makeover especially in a theme they like, I think it's a great idea op!

NoHolidaysforyou · 27/04/2019 21:06

This is a weird thread to me. Does every child really expect wallpaper, paint, new duvet covers, themed lamp shades, and art as standard? At one point my parents had to let a home and I could never dream of being just entitled to that, I was lucky if I could stick a few posters on the wall. I just don't think it's fair to tell all families that their children must get fully decorated rooms as standard. A well designed room with art is a luxury imo that a kid should be really chuffed with as a present. We did our children's rooms and the wallpaper, art, and accessories did add up. I wouldn't be surprised if we ended up spending like £200+ per room.

ThatCurlyGirl · 27/04/2019 21:09

I never understand people trashing this idea, I think it's brilliant - A WHOLE NEW ROOM!

All themed and gorgeous just for him - you sound like a brill mum and it's sad mums are made to think even this isn't "good enough" so you had to ask!

Go for it - bet he'll love it and want to show it off to his mates too :)

Springwalk · 27/04/2019 21:11

I would add some small gifts and any gifts others send to him, and make a birthday treasure hunt in his new bedroom. That would really add the excitement, along with plenty of balloons everywhere in his room, ribbon to cut to enter the room and a big fanfare. I would be checking, double and triple checking his favourite theme though 😇

Bringbackthestripes · 27/04/2019 21:15

I probably wouldn't want my living room painted for my birthday so wouldn't be fair to do it for my child!

^I agree.
Also did DD have hers done for her birthday or did she get gifts for her birthday and her bedroom was it just re decorated another time?

TessaL23 · 27/04/2019 21:18

Lame

LaCastafiore · 27/04/2019 21:20

I wouldn’t be happy if my dh decorated a room and called it my birthday present either
could be worst, it could be a new kitchen, "tadam!".

Hadenoughofitall441 · 27/04/2019 21:21

Personally I wouldn’t do this as a birthday present, but everyone is different. Each family has thier own situation. I dunno if as an 8 year old he will really understand not getting presents. But if hes up for it then I’d go for it.

Inferiorbeing · 27/04/2019 21:24

DH is still upset this happened to him Grin he was 11 and they turned it into apparently a girly room as it was lilac and got rid of his kiddy wallpaper! So I wouldn't do it as a surprise but it's a nice idea

bobstersmum · 27/04/2019 21:24

My kids are kids that still have imaginations, not kids that are bunged an ipad and left to it. My kids are 2, 5, and 6 and they build dens out of the dining chairs and cushions, they get excited if I move the furniture around because it all seems new to them, they would be over the moon with themed bedroom makeover. All those saying it's lame must have grabby ungrateful kids!

MoaningMinniee · 27/04/2019 21:24

I have thought about this - but both dds have decorated their rooms with with artwork directly onto the walls - and I don't want to be the bastard parent who destroyed their pictures wantonly.

Marchinupandownagain · 27/04/2019 21:26

if DH decorated a room and said it was for Christmas/birthday I'd not be impressed.

I'd be fucking delighted. I do all the DIY and it's like pulling teeth to get him to clear out rooms even. There are some very grabby people on here.

Starlight456 · 27/04/2019 21:31

I think it sounds Fab..

Over the summer holiday we decorated my son's bedroom as he was going up to high school. So it was a more grown up room. He loved it so much shared it on whatsapp...

it wasn't his birthday but was very special to him.

I had my lounge painted this year.. it wouldn't be a birthday present to me as it is a communal area but lets not put adult thoughts on our children.

multivac · 27/04/2019 21:32

Our boys got a bedroom makeover for their 14th birthday. It was a gift from us and both grandmothers - and it was their Christmas gift from my mum, too (we don't do Christmas gifts). We couldn't have done it any other way. They were absolutely thrilled.

LaCastafiore · 27/04/2019 21:35

My kids are kids that still have imaginations, not kids that are bunged an ipad and left to it Grin

I'd love to understand your link between ipad and new paint Grin

I'd rather my own children to be interested by books, toys and adventures than by furniture personally, but each to their own

PlatypusPie · 27/04/2019 21:38

I think it’s a great present - you know your son and his tastes and i’m sure he would be really pleased with it.

BarbedBloom · 27/04/2019 21:47

It would be fine if he gets to pick the design etc. My mum did this for me, but did it in a style she thought I would like and I really hated it.

tanpestryfirescreen · 27/04/2019 21:59

I was thinking about that because my oldest DD already had her room decorated

Was this her birthday gift?

sparklytwinklyfairylights · 27/04/2019 22:11

Great idea op, I'm sure he'll love it, especially if he's not expecting it

blahdeeblahh · 27/04/2019 22:12

We did a room makeover for one of my sons Christmas's he absolutely loved it he was made up xx

NW2SW · 27/04/2019 22:15

I would've loved this as a child, in fact I think I asked for it. I think it's nice to be considered, especially at that age when hobbies change like the wind

feelinghopeful2 · 27/04/2019 22:19

Defiantly a great present for a birthday, I know many people who have done it and seems like a much better use of gift budget!

NuffSaidSam · 27/04/2019 22:20

What you can see from this thread is that it depends entirely on your child.

If your DS would like it, go for it. Maybe sound him out by saying you know someone who did that for their DC and see if he says 'I'd love that' or 'I'd hate that'.

The attitude that all DC are entitled to an amazingly decorated room with all matching accessories etc. as standard is probably telling of income level. Lots of people can't afford that. Millions and millions of kids growing up in perfectly acceptable, but not luxurious bedrooms. That's a skew of the mumsnet population.

Original poster
Frazzels · 27/04/2019 22:24

DD's wasn't for her birthday but it wasn't done all at once, over a couple weeks when we had time. I understand that children having nice bedrooms is standard but I wouldn't say I've ever done a full bedroom makeover, it's kind of just things get replaced and changed over time. I've found lots of nice little things to put in there and he'll still have presents to open plus a party. It's something different at least, he gets lots of toys every year, many of which he rarely uses

OP posts:
Gazelda · 27/04/2019 22:24

Did you do your DD's for her birthday?

If you did, then I think it sounds a good idea for DS.

If DD's wasn't as a birthday present, then it would be unfair to do it to DS. Why not let him help choose the decorations, then Surprise him with special accessories for his birthday - beanbag, his own radio, light box etc.

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