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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think this is careless and be annoyed

41 replies

PedroTheCowboy · 27/04/2019 16:28

Made my inlaws a cup of tea while they visiting. Fils wife (step mil) had a phone call so she put her hot tea (freshly made 5 minutes ago) on the floor while my 16 month year old dc was playing on the same floor. I didn't notice until I came into the living room, fil and dh didn't say anything (they were in the same room). AIBU to think this is quite careless and you have to be really careful with hot drinks around young children and certainly not put them within easy reach.

OP posts:

brizzlemint · 27/04/2019 17:45

Provide them with a small table to put the tea on - where are they supposed to put it if you don't have a coffee table or a small side table?

NameChangeNugget · 27/04/2019 17:47

This really was a non-event.

KinkyFink · 27/04/2019 17:51

Ds also reached up and got a huge knife DH left close to the edge - yes I was angry with DH but nothing happened and we realised we needed to keep anything remotely dangerous completely out of reach.

There are thousands of things kids can hurt themselves with in houses, we just have to do the best we possibly can. It is stressful but that's just part of parenting.

I'm told it's worse when they start staying out until all hours of the night!

BogglesGoggles · 27/04/2019 17:55

A lot of people don’t realise that a 5 minute old cup of tea is hot enough to scald a child

Original poster

PedroTheCowboy · 27/04/2019 18:10

brizzlemint I have a big dinning table that dc can't reach in living room to put tea on. Dc could tea reach on a coffee or side table.

OP posts:

Bluntness100 · 27/04/2019 18:12

Were they not watching the child, so would have seen if they went close to the tea? So really there was no risk?

Are you generally quite anxious? I'm guessing this is your first kid?

Original poster

PedroTheCowboy · 27/04/2019 18:21

My dc can run fast and can run into the kitchen before my DH can catch him and close the safety gate. So could have happened so quickly, to quickly to react and stop it. It was also on my very expensive rug. She was standing up next to tea and could have easily knocked it over. Its just rude to put any drink on someone's rug when there is a dining table near by.

OP posts:

grumpyyetgorgeous · 27/04/2019 18:23

I think people forget how fast and into everything babies and toddlers are. It was a bit thoughtless, yes but nobody got hurt so let it go this time.

lljkk · 27/04/2019 18:30

Your DH should be more aware, yes.

MrBrown · 27/04/2019 18:53

OP I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. It's very very thoughtless. And for people saying it's a non event, yes it is but if something had happened then the consequences are horrific, which I know first hand.

My DS poured a freshly made cup of black coffee all over his face and chest/arms when he was 10 months old and sustained very severe burns, thankfully he only has 2 tiny scars on his arms now but it was the worst experience of our lives. It all happened so quickly, before DP and I could even do anything about it. We didn't even know he could reach where it was. I was so neurotic after and made everyone drink from thermos cups for about a year after it happened.

arseabouttit · 27/04/2019 19:04

YANBU obviously!

Next time you make them tea pointedly say " oooh, let's keep this scalding HOT drink out of reach shall to prevent any accidents! Dear MIL /FIL whoever, please don't put your drink any where within DS's reach - he's a terror at the minute and moves so quickly!". Breezily, of course. And don't leave the room. It's boring but people can be a bit blasé- I'm pretty hyper when it comes to potential accidents though...

Either that or only serve drinks to visitors in bomb and baby proof reusable cups with lids that can't come off.

arseabouttit · 27/04/2019 19:05

Revised YANBU About the safety thing. Re- read and if you have a precious rug give guests a coffee table and a coaster to put their drink on!

MereDintofPandiculation · 27/04/2019 19:30

Its just rude to put any drink on someone's rug when there is a dining table near by.
Well, there's a rule of etiquette that's passed me by. Where is it in the hierarchy compared to "it's rude to put any drink on a nicely polished dining table (unless there's a coaster)"?

pictish · 27/04/2019 19:32

She won’t have done it on purpose. I understand it’s dangerous but you seem disproportionately annoyed about it.
Next time say, “I’m just going to pop this tea up here out of the little ones’ reach.”
There will be more near misses to come and what’s more, some of them will be your oversight. It happens to us all.
Try to keep perspective. X

Mummy1224 · 27/04/2019 20:14

That is annoying, but I don’t think it’s anything you can bring back up now that the moment has passed.

My in laws do this kind of thing, putting glasses on the floor, having lit candles on their hearth when we arrive, and on one occasion lighting an open fire after I had asked them to wait until the children were in bed.

At this point I’ve accepted that they just don’t have child safety in their minds as we do, which is understandable when you haven’t had a toddler around for 30 years.

I just keep my eye on the kids at all times when they’re around....almost pretend there isn’t another adult there, just keep your normal level of vigilance up! It’s a little tiring, feeling like you have to watch more people rather than just the kids, but it’s just the way it is, it’s hard to change people! Good luck!

Mummy1224 · 27/04/2019 20:16

Also agree with Pictish - totally just move the things yourself

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