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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU for not wanting everybody’s dog at my house?

50 replies

Dogparty · 26/04/2019 12:07

I’ve posted a couple of times but name changed for this.
I adore dogs, I have an elderly and very spoilt dog myself and I love meeting friends and walking the dogs together.

However, we are having a few friends over tomorrow night and everybody wants to bring their dog. Would be fine if I didn’t have a crawling baby or if my elderly dog didn’t get grumpy when dogs visit his house.
There will be 5 dogs running around with a crawling baby and I’ll be running round trying to host and trying to keep their licky dogs away from baby & his toys. Plus trying to keep my dog on the sofa out of the way. If we were bbqing in the garden it would be fine with me. But we are in the house! AIBU? I feel like I am because I’m fine with them here one at a time but all at once is stressing me out.

OP posts:
justasking111 · 26/04/2019 14:43

Just say no, we lock our own dogs up when we have visitors. Their dogs can just curl up in their own homes for the evening.

Original poster
Dogparty · 26/04/2019 15:01

I will have to say won’t I. I’ve never asked anyone to bring their dog to ours. Even on my wedding day I had my dog with me. A further two guests decided to bring their dogs to my wedding!!! There were 3 dogs there! Who would ever have thought that was ok?! And they were different friends to the ones coming tomorrow night. One of the dogs got stressed and bit another wedding guest. I don’t know how I get into these situations. Eve time must know I’m a pushover.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dogparty · 26/04/2019 15:02

Everyone*

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 26/04/2019 15:10

One of the dogs got stressed and bit another wedding guest.

This is exactly what you should be concerned about. This time it could be your baby. Stop being a pushover and use your common sense. This is a bad idea.

SandAndSea · 26/04/2019 15:11

I'm a dog lover and don't think you're bu. I welcomed my friend's dog a while back. It was sitting on the sofa when I suddenly saw something moving... It was crawling with fleas!!

I would send a message saying you've had a re-think.

gamerchick · 26/04/2019 15:14

Send that message now OP. Christ, just no.

Original poster
Dogparty · 26/04/2019 16:17

That made us sound like the Dingles... it was a proper wedding in that there was a sit down meal in a tipi, not a shirt & jeans casual event.

OP posts:
Turquoisetamborine · 26/04/2019 16:20

Fuck no. My brother is like this. Him and his partner don’t have kids but they treat their dog like a baby. I had to say that I’m severely allergic to dogs and their dog wasn’t invited to my house.

Orangeballon · 26/04/2019 16:22

Not a good idea, could result in a massive dog fight.

MrsMozartMkII · 26/04/2019 16:29

Gawd no. Only DDs digs come here. Others ask and we decide on the circs at the time.

Can't imagine rocking up anywhere with my mutts, unless there was a designated secure run for them. They're not nasty, just big and bouncy.

TimeIhadaNameChange · 26/04/2019 16:47

Ring them all up and tell them the dogs will have to stay in the car. If that's fine you can all go out for a walk together, but you can't have any of them in the house.

Bringbackthestripes · 26/04/2019 16:57

I have never even contemplated taking my dog round to someone else’s house- how bizarre. Awful that people brought dogs to your wedding! You know a lot of very strange people.

Summersunsareglowing · 26/04/2019 17:06

I'd get back in touch with your friends and just say sorry but you can't bring your dog's after all. Just say what you've said on here, that you'll be on tenterhooks watching the baby to make sure she isn't getting licked and that it is just too much for you to cope with.

5 dogs is a pack and, if they haven't been together before, you have no idea how they'll interact. Your DC's safety is paramount. I am also a dog lover.

Original poster
Dogparty · 27/04/2019 10:45

I’ve put my foot down for tonight. It went down like a lead balloon but at least I don’t have to worry anymore! I’ve told them I’d rather they didn’t bring their dogs unless we are bbqing in the garden.

OP posts:
gingerbiscuits · 27/04/2019 10:57

Don't be such a pushover- that sounds like hell - just tell them they can't bring them! Who takes their dog to an evening party at a friend's house? Weird!

QuickThinkOfAName · 27/04/2019 11:02

To be honest I’d be reevaluating my friends if they got the hump about bringing their uninvited dog to someone’s house - with or without the very real danger Of a baby in the mix.

I say that as a dog owner. I would never presume it was ok to bring her. And I certainly wouldn’t get annoyed if I couldn’t

gamerchick · 27/04/2019 11:06

Good for you and if anyone mentions it. Tell them you would rather see how all the dogs do at their house as a trial run.

Vinorosso74 · 27/04/2019 11:09

YANBU at all! Sounds too stressful for everyone human and canine. You don't take your animals to someone else's house unless said animal(s) are invited.
I don't get why some people have to take their dogs everywhere. Ok you can't leave them all day but surely a few hours is fine otherwise don't stay as long or don't go.

LucheroTena · 27/04/2019 11:13

People are getting weird about their dogs, it’s not helpful for dogs to never learn to cope alone for a few hours. You did the right thing, I can’t believe that people thought it was ok! And I love dogs.

MsTSwift · 27/04/2019 11:20

Well done op even reading your op made me feel stressed!

coral13 · 27/04/2019 11:23

We have the kind of friendships and family that will take our dogs to each other houses all the time... But because we know it's fine and the dogs all like each other so it's great for them.

However, Grandad's dog is old and doesn't really like other dogs so we don't take ours to his... It just seems like common sense.

stucknoue · 27/04/2019 11:28

For just an evening yanbu though when we visit people for the day we do generally take our dog (always checking first)

mcmooberry · 27/04/2019 11:31

Was going to reply to say change your mind but see that you have already told them no - good!!

QuickThinkOfAName · 27/04/2019 11:34

@stucknoue - the difference is you’d ask and not presume it was okay.

But are you saying you think the op is unreasonable for saying no dogs if it was an all day thing? (Apologies if not but that’s how it comes across)

Sweetpea55 · 28/04/2019 08:37

Whats wrong with them..why cant they have a night out without bringing the blasted dog with them.?

I can never understand why people have to take their dogs with them to
Garden Fetes, Jumble Sales,

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