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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Sister inlaw

11 replies

fluffY10345 · 24/04/2019 03:00

AIBU? So my sister in law doesn’t really bother with my children unless she needs to lend money or needs my oh to do her a favour.. so over the bank holiday she’s phoned to lend money and my oh been a soft touch said yes ( I think he was hoping she’d call before I had got back from my nephews party as this has caused many arguments) anyway while she was there my children refused to talk to her my youngest wouldn’t let me put him down she asked me just to pass him to her and I said no I wasn’t upsetting my child she then began saying she’s their auntie and should be allowed to hold him etc now normally when she’s around I bite my tongue when she makes comments about being an auntie and how they’re her favourites and her babies, but I snapped and said your an auntie when it suits you when you need something my boys don’t even know her name that’s how little she sees them. The worst part is my oh is now giving me the silent treatment, but he knows I want my kids to know their family know where they come from my brother travels from Scotland ever two weeks to visit his sister lives 10 minutes away.. was I in the wrong? Should I apologise?

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 24/04/2019 03:23

I wouldn't apologise. Why should you? Your biggest problem is your husband giving away money that should go to your family's needs, not to his greedy sister.

fluffY10345 · 24/04/2019 03:31

Thank you 😊 yeah that is an issue and we have had endless arguments about it I would totally understand him lending money for food/bills but it’s always for nights out

OP posts:
DibsTheCat · 24/04/2019 03:56

Why does she keep lending you money?

Does she think the only way she can see her brother and your DC is that she has to offer you money?

RebootYourEngine · 24/04/2019 04:00

Does she lend you money or borrow money from you?

IOnWednesdaysWeWearPinkI · 24/04/2019 04:09

This sounds like my sister in law she only ever contacts us when she needs help with something like with her car.
Think she has only ever seen my daughter 10 times since she has been born and she is 18 months old!
Why should you apologize?! You have bit your tongue long enough and your husband needs to stop enabling her he is picking q fight with the wrong person. And I hope she is repaying all this money she is borrowing from you

Mummyoflittledragon · 24/04/2019 04:13

Dibs
Reboot
Op is using lending in the sense of borrowing. I imagine it’s a regional colloquialism.

Mummyoflittledragon · 24/04/2019 04:14

No you shouldn’t apologise. She sounds like an arse.

DibsTheCat · 24/04/2019 04:20

Oh right, got you.

So SIL is borrowing money from the OP.

OP is lending money to the SIL.

fluffY10345 · 24/04/2019 06:34

No she is always lending from my oh she doesn’t work and claims benefits

OP posts:
fluffY10345 · 24/04/2019 06:37

It’s awful isn’t it I think the best time to bond with children is when they are small

OP posts:
Mummyoflittledragon · 24/04/2019 06:42

Yes the best time to bond with children is when they’re little. She doesn’t seem to want to. Her loss. Your dh clearly has a blind spot for his sister.

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