To ask for help with my phobia

[BumpIntheNite]

I know IABU with this stupid, stupid phobia.

It started when I was about 8. The fear is worse, if anything, as I've gotten older.

I'm afraid of ghosts/spirits. Even though I know logically they don't exist. I'm very skeptical, scientific, logically minded.

But this phobia is overwhelming. It's at it's worst at night time, I feel convinced that there's something evil in the room and it's going to 'get' me. The fear is utter panic.

I didn't sleep with the light off until I was mid 20s. I used to avoid hotels in case they were haunted.

Thing is, I'm married so I'm with my husband every night. And I'm fine. If I'm with someone, I'm fine.

But for the first time in 5 years, DH has to go away for work from tomorrow for a week. I'll be on my own in the house.

I'm already nervous.

Any advice/tips on how I can cope?!

PLEASE don't post your ghost stories or experiences of anything weird, I have to avoid any 'woo' threads because they're triggering. This is a genuine phobia.

It's just because we have very good imaginations I think At my worst, even joking about a monster in the wardrobe would be enough to set me off worrying about the wardrobe

You'll be ok - if it helps, despite all my ridiculous nerviness and overactive imaginings, absolutely nothing remotely creepy or scary has ever happened to me!

Try self help?:

www.talkplus.org.uk/downloads_folder/Graded_Exposure.pdf

OP I completely empathise with you, I have something really similar, a little less severe perhaps but if my DH falls asleep first I lie awake for hours feeling unprotected and like something's there... even though I know it's completely ridiculous.

I'm also currently having some CBT for childhood trauma, mainly concerning an abusive older sibling who used to do horrid and cruel things to me when I was asleep in my room.
We haven't delved too much into this yet, but I'm under the belief that this has led to me feeling unsafe at night/ asleep and, as I have no physical tormentor to attribute my panic to, my mind has created ghosts to validate the fear.

I hope you manage to get through the next few days ok, I use lights, lavender and gentle comedy in the background if I'm on my own and having a bad time.

Someone once told me, the dead can’t hurt you, it’s the living you should be afraid of. Not sure if that helps OP. Could you borrow a friend dog for the weekend so you have some company?

You aren't being ridiculous. I remember reading that Stephen King, won't even sleep with his leg outside of the covers! He knows his stuff is made up and he still feels like that.

I hope you're getting enough sleep.

Well, I survived!

My first night alone in the house for years and years. I could notice the phobia thoughts throughout the day, but kept them at bay.

I took all the advice - I went for a long walk, kept busy all day so I was knackered by 9pm. I watched comedy for an hour or so in bed, felt a bit jumpy but mostly relaxed. I re read the thread and felt so reassured!

I even switched the light off at 11pm and slept in the dark! Though I kept the landing light on so it wasn't totally bleak

I did wake up a few times but overall, massive success. Hopefully tonight will go just as well.

Thank you everyone!

That's good! I hope you're sound asleep right now and have another successful night.

Well done OP, a huge achievement!