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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

DP annoyed that I didn’t get him an Easter egg

38 replies

Eastermoaner · 21/04/2019 08:48

Been with DP 3 years. The last 2 I’ve got him an Easter egg. He’s never bought me me but I’m really not that arsed - I’m an adult in my late 30’s and it’s a bloody chocolate egg so I couldn’t care less if I got one or not.

I have 2 kids from a previous relationship and have just had a baby 2 weeks ago. I had a pretty bad birth and haven’t been too well since. The baby is completely consuming my time and I also had to sort the Easter eggs for the other 2 kids so it completely slipped my mind to get him an egg this year.

I got up with this kids this morning to give them their eggs and a few little Easter activities (while he lay in bed) afterwards, the kids came in and gave me an egg they said it was from them and DP. I went into the bedroom and thanked him for the egg and apologised that I’d completely forgotten to get him an egg this year. He gave me this look and said “eh, ok. I was looking forward to eating a bit of chocolate but it doesn’t matter” in a really snide tone. I explained my mind has been on other things and I genuinely forgot and all I got was “it’s fine”

So I went into the sitting room, got the egg he gave me, went into the bedroom, sat it on the bedside cabinet and told him to knock himself out and eat as much chocolate as he wanted. He didn’t answer me.

I honestly feel quite pissed off about this. I don’t even want the egg he got me now after his reaction. AIBU?

OP posts:

Wheresmyvagina · 21/04/2019 09:35

God almighty why do you do everything in the house? How have you got into this situation?

EleanorLavish · 21/04/2019 09:37

You do need to sit down and talk about sharing household chores. If you are doing everything, that’s not right. Draw up a rota and make him do much more at the min as you are feeding/doing nights etc.

TreadingThePrimrosePath · 21/04/2019 09:38

Bluebird, you are assuming this is his first time parenting.
He may have a slew of failed relationships and children in his wake. He may well move from mummy-partner to mummy-partner, wanting to find someone to look after him. I wouldn’t tolerate that from my own adult children, let alone a partner.

Ghanagirl · 21/04/2019 09:41

@Littlebluebird123
Gosh mansplaining much🤷🏾‍♀️

Catchingbentcoppers · 21/04/2019 09:50

@Littlebluebird123 you do sound patronising. He's a grown man FFS and the OP has three children, one of them being two weeks old. If he really needs everything spelling out to him, as you suggest, then he's as pathetic as he sounds.

notacooldad · 21/04/2019 10:01

Littlebluebird123
Come of it!!!
He is a fully functioning adult. He has eyes! He can see what load the OP has at the moment.
The sooner he realizes you can't be everyone's priority all the time and pulling together as a team names life easier for everyone the better!!

GreigLaidlawsbarofsoap · 21/04/2019 10:13

He is a cockwomble. Lazy, self absorbed, thinks you should be running round after him 2 weeks after giving birth? Twunt.

BuzzPeakWankBobbly · 21/04/2019 10:18

Buy him two for the price of one tomorrow...

Aprillygirl · 21/04/2019 10:19

This is the first time he's been a parent. Yes it means he is lower in priorities, but he's not had that before. He needs to get used to it.

OP was already a mum of two, he should have been well used to not being her priority already. OP it seems you've lumbered yourself with a lazy,selfish manchild. Get that egg and scoff it right in front of him,sounds like you need the energy much more than he does!

TheHeathenOfSuburbia · 21/04/2019 10:20

I literally do everything in terms of housework, meals and looking after the kids

Er... why?

YemenRoadYemen · 21/04/2019 10:32

Gosh OP, I'd like to have some sympathy for you, but I can't find any.

Why are you shackled to such a numpty? Don't tell me, the baby wasn't planned.

Original poster

Eastermoaner · 21/04/2019 13:45

@YemenRoadYemen

When did I ask for sympathy? I asked if I was being unreasonable to be annoyed as his reaction.

Also - I’m not shackled to anyone and whether my baby was planned or not has fuck all to do with you or what was asked in this post.

OP posts:

YemenRoadYemen · 21/04/2019 19:43

Well, of course you're not unreasonable to be annoyed, but you can hardly be surprised.

Tell him to stop being such a pathetic, whinging baby, and that it's time to step up to the plate and be a proper father and partner. This baby is just as much his responsibility as yours. Why has he opted out completely?

I'd be absolutely fucking livid, if I were you. I do think you're shackled, because the picture you've painted of him is dreadful. Inconsiderate, self-centred, whiny, sulky, lazy, completely disrespectful. He wouldn't be able to describe you in those terms in a million years. It must be time for things to change.

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