So DH and I married almost 4 years, with DD just 2. We live away from both sets of parents, so no family support day to day which is fine. We manage work/parental responsibility/household and both full-time. Our first year of marriage challenging due to expectations to spend time with in-laws. I went along with it...newly married don't rock the boat, but it became tiresome and caused friction between me and DH and in-laws. They struggled to understand why we would want to spend time on our own. DH no balls to stand up to mil as afraid of upsetting. Happens all the time. This bank hol thought ok we'll prob go see them, but suggested we go down Sat am, so that's 3 days there and day at home to just chill. We have family do on bh mon, so easier to be there. Well the uproar! DH had already told mil we'd travel down Thurs after work as apparently we never spend bank hols with them (I get home after 6pm most days). Bullshit! Every bank hol, most weekends over last few years have been at theres. It's a 90 min drive each way. He feels constantly stuck in middle, which he is. I'm his wife, she's mother. I've suggested compromise, she's in a mood as it's not the whole weekend. AIBU?