Would you crash diet before your proposal?

[ShellsAndSunrises]

I suspect that my wonderful DP is planning to propose. He was trying to subtly measure my fingers with a ring sizer last night .

We have two trips planned in mid-May and late-July, to places that mean a lot to us both. I suspect he will ask me at one of those places. He's quite romantic at heart, so there's no chance of him telling me in advance, but we've talked about marriage and we had a look at rings I like a few months back.

My dilemma. I am currently 13 stone. I am bigger than I have ever been before. I have been going to the gym for cardio and strength workouts since January, I've limited myself to 1,200 calories and am weighing everything religiously, but I've lost maybe 4kg total. It is SLOW.

I am much happier and healthier around 10st. Last time that I lost any significant weight, I was heartbroken and ended up eating little and burning 800 calories a day walking for hours, which meant I burnt off quite a lot quite quickly. I am so tempted to do something like that again... but I basically just worked, walked and slept then, and I was hangry a lot. DP doesn't really deserve to live with me hangry!

He loves me the way I am and says slow and steady is fine, and if I'm unhappy with the speed, to go for hour-long walks or so during lunchtimes... but I'm so tempted to do something more drastic.

WWYD? Am I being silly to want to lose it faster?

I miss doing all the fun things with him, like going out to eat or having a glass of wine together, or throwing clothes on without worrying about if they fit and whether I look like an elephant.

Why do you need to do it for the proposal in particular? To look better in any pictures?

Slow and steady is better....but I know where you're coming from. I am the heaviest I've ever been and trying to lose right now and it's hard.

How do you subtly measure someone's ring with a ring sizer?

Don't focus on the proposal, focus on how you want to feel, I've yo yo dieted for years (since I was 18 - I am now 60 ) so feel free to ignore my advice.

Slow and steady is probably best, and find an eating and exercise regime that you can stick to - I've been at 'target' so many times, and always put the weight back on, my DH (married 30 years) doesn't care - or at least never comments - but I know I am healthier when I weigh less.

Good luck.

I have no idea why you’d do that for a proposal.

Absolutely get healthier and feel good about yourself but why pressure yourself?

I didn’t even lose weight for my wedding and I’m properly fat.

If you want to diet, do something long term and sustainable and do it for you, not for a cheesy picture

Good luck

If you crash diet you will put all that weight back on, and risk making yourself ill as a result. Do you want a nice proposal only to keel over afterwards?

Doesn’t crash dieting put your metabolism into starvation mode anyway, meaning it slows down?

Slow and steady is much better all round. I don’t remember if we took photos when DH proposed but if we did they’re not framed and on the wall. Just keep going as you are; your DP clearly loves you regardless which is just as it should be.

Slow and steady is best, what is the point of doing something which makes you miserable and is unsustainable just for the proposal pictures. Your DP knows what you look like and loves you anyway. Lose weight for yourself if you want to but do it sensibly.

Yes, agree with other posters that this should be something you want to do for you for ever. Linking it to your proposal and wedding is unlikely to get you thinking of it as a long term, and therefore successful weightless.

Weightloss

Don’t bother . My ring was bought at my slimmest. 10 years down the line neither ring fits and I can’t wear them.