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AIBU?

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Original poster

To buy ds a smart phone for his 9th birthday?

34 replies

Suliemantra · 17/04/2019 13:22

Have I gone mad?

I genuinely thought there would be child safe internet enabled phones to buy. Nothing at car phone warehouse!

I want to be able to speak to him when he is at his dad's and be able to call him while he gets increasing independence to go to the green in our village.

His dad says I'm bonkers but can't I say no data use while out of the house and put high parental controls on the WiFi at home?

OP posts:
IncrediblySadToo · 17/04/2019 13:25

Buy him a £10 PAYG phone that only does phone calls and text messages, if you really think he needs one. Plenty of us ‘played out’and just came home at a given time or when the street lights come on 🤷🏻‍♀️

Easterbunnynearlyhere · 17/04/2019 13:25

Just get a tenner phone from Tesco. Unfair on a young dc to have the responsibility of a phone imo.

grasspigeons · 17/04/2019 13:26

you can do a family link think with google that limits a lot of the stuff they can access (eg no you tube, you have to approve all apps)

SplashingAroundTown · 17/04/2019 13:26

Yes. You have gone mad.

But a Nokia phone to make calls on. There isn’t a 9 year old in the world who needs a smart phone. It will be lost, stolen, used inappropriately...

mookinsx · 17/04/2019 13:30

Think 10 is the usual age in our family - and smart phones are the in thing and means they keep it charged and use it so it's not a waste of time/money

Excited101 · 17/04/2019 13:31

Just get him a brick if he needs one! (If)

His dad can contact you if he needs you, were raising generations totally reliant on the mobile.

If he’s out with anything more expensive he’ll be a total target for muggers too anyway.

NancyJoan · 17/04/2019 13:32

Why does he need to have a phone with internet access?

Original poster
Suliemantra · 17/04/2019 13:42

Ah well he needs internet access so that I can track him

OP posts:
Original poster
Suliemantra · 17/04/2019 13:43

I would block Google you tube etc and he doesn't have any sm accounts

OP posts:
Original poster
Suliemantra · 17/04/2019 13:43

And so he can download games I approve of

OP posts:
NoSquirrels · 17/04/2019 13:44

If you want to call him at his dad's, call his dad's phone.

If you think he needs a phone to go to the park, buy a Nokia if you really, really must, and put PAYG on it.

He doesn't need internet access on a mobile phone at 9.

NoSquirrels · 17/04/2019 13:44

You don't need to "track" him. If he's not trustworthy enough to be out and about alone where he said he would be, then he's not trustworthy enough.

ncqtime · 17/04/2019 13:49

Just bought my nine year old a phone to keep in touch when he plays out. Seventy quid in Tesco. I've been into all the apps to change the settings to filter out adult content and will keep an eye on search history. You can also go into play store settings to limit downloads by age rating with a pin so your child can't just change it back. Oh and make sure you get a good case. It's nice for him to be able to independently keep in touch with family for free

Original poster
Suliemantra · 17/04/2019 13:50

His dad won't let him speak to me on his phone and for peace of mind I would like to be able to know where he is

OP posts:
RedSkyLastNight · 17/04/2019 13:50

He surely doesn't need tracking. A 9 year old should have limited well defined boundaries and if he doesn't stick to them doesn't get to go out without an adult.
If you really need something for games (and there is plenty of options without a phone) I would suggest buying a cheap tablet and buying him a cheap nonsmartphone for contact purposes and so he can prove he can use it sensibly, primo to getting a smartphone when he's older.

Original poster
Suliemantra · 17/04/2019 13:51

Thanks for the sensible answer @ncqtime. Which phone did you get on which contract?

OP posts:
Order654 · 17/04/2019 13:51

I don’t see a problem with it.

My daughter is allowed to walk to and from school when she is 9. She will be taking a mobile with her so she can tell me she got to school safe and I don’t care if anyone thinks that’s over the top.

RedSkyLastNight · 17/04/2019 13:54

Order perfectly sensible for your DC to have a mobile when they are walking to school on their own.
However, not necessary for this to be a smartphone.

Original poster
Suliemantra · 17/04/2019 13:54

@order654 is it a smart phone? If so, which one and how do you monitor the internet use?

OP posts:
ncqtime · 17/04/2019 13:59

We got a Motorola e5 play and so far so good. No contract just top ups

HBStowe · 17/04/2019 14:27

IMO 9 is too young for a smartphone. If it’s just falling and texting you want just get him a cheap sim only phone. There is so much danger he could be exposed to with a smartphone

IceRebel · 17/04/2019 14:28

He surely doesn't need tracking. A 9 year old should have limited well defined boundaries and if he doesn't stick to them doesn't get to go out without an adult.

This //\

If you're so concerned about where he is when he's not with you, then you need to have a chat about staying near the green and letting you know by text before he goes anywhere else. You don't need to buy a smartphone to play detective and track his movements.

WhatToDoAboutWailmerGoneRogue · 17/04/2019 14:32

YABU and it would be very lax parenting to get him a smartphone just so you can track him.

You may think you can ban everything you don’t want him to have access to, but you really, really can’t.

If he absolutely has to have a phone it should not be a smartphone due to safeguarding concerns.

Bagofworries · 17/04/2019 15:18

Ok so what if he gets a smartphone and you do track him on it and his phone runs out of power?
Or his father switches it off?

MrsTerryPratchett · 17/04/2019 15:22

You can get a Tile tracker or similar to keep tabs on him and a crap phone for calls. Internet access, however blocked, is worrisome. I knew all my mum's passwords because she's not really tech savvy. I wouldn't risk it.