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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think my summer born will be fine starting school in September 2020?

93 replies

worriedwinfred · 17/04/2019 12:31

DS was born mid July. I'm just asking if I'm being unfair to expect that he will be ok to start school in the year group he is expected to start in rather than applying to delay for a year?
He's really confident and intelligent and I feel he will definitely be ready however i wouldn't want to send him if it's not the best decision. Does anyone have experience of sending summer born children to school the September after they turn 4?were they ok?

OP posts:

ShaggyRug · 17/04/2019 15:56

DD is late July burn and thrived all through school. She was even one of 10 children put in a mixed year 1/2 class instead of year 1 as she was fine to handle being with the older kids.

Birthday does not define a child’s abilities or maturity. Base it on the individual child rather than when they’re born and if he’s ready let him go.

Caterina99 · 17/04/2019 20:45

My DS is an end of June birthday. I’ve no intention of holding him back (if it’s even possible). I’m sure he’ll be totally ready by September

Original poster

worriedwinfred · 18/04/2019 00:11

Thankyou for your replies! It's wonderful to hear of your summer born DCs doing so well! I'll see where we are in a few months but from what I have read I do feel D'S will be ready for 2020 start.

OP posts:

Helix1244 · 18/04/2019 01:07

Not ready for my dc was still having tantrums. Still napping/getting tired in afternoon.
No road sense, impulsive etc.
Getting very tired if running about alot

tor8181 · 18/04/2019 01:35

mine wasnt,hes a end of july baby and was 4 and a month starting full time school
3 and a bit starting nursery,granted it was only 2 and half hours in the afternoons but he did 3 out of 5 days as i felt he was to young

he started school at 4 and left school still 4

he ended reception year not ready for y1 so the teacher suggested he repeated reception so he stayed with her which was a better for him as he was 5

even then he was tired and he would be off thursday and fridays as he was always knackered

they used to moan at me but as he was under CSA they couldnt say much

he didnt do y1 the year later as they put him straight in a y2/y3 class and he struggled as it was a massive shock as it was so different

i took him out to home educate christmas year y2 as he was still reception level and was left to play all day so i though bugger it i can do better

FireFighter999 · 18/04/2019 01:46

My youngest was born in June and started School in the September after his 4 the Birthday, he loved Reception but we struggled with lots of things and i wish i had delayed his school entrance by a year.

agnurse · 18/04/2019 02:11

Only you can decide what's best for your son.

I am a September baby. When we lived in the U.S. when I was small, the cut-off for turning 5 for Kindergarten (Reception) was September 1. My parents got permission to enroll me anyway because they knew I was ready. When I was in Grade 2, my teacher told my parents that I was wasting my time being in her class, that I was so far ahead of the other kids she couldn't design a program that would meet my needs as the other kids wouldn't be able to do it. My brother is a February baby and started a year early. He is smarter than I am.

It depends on the child.

SandyY2K · 18/04/2019 02:25

DD is born in August and is a top secret student.

I don't believe it makes a difference by the time important exams come into play. One of my best friends at school was born on 31st of August...she was a top set brainy student.

She got 3s in the first SATS and 6s in year 6 SATS.

She did her GCSEs last year and aced them.

With boys.. there can be playful and often need more guidance. My observation when I used to help out weekly in primary school, was that the boys tended to be more behind than girls and they just mess around more. I do think parents could guide and support them to do better though...instead of what I used to hear a lot "that's boys for you"

Triangled · 18/04/2019 02:51

Mine's an August child who started at age 4. She has exceeded all expectations and is in top set for reading etc and absolutely thriving at school. She is in a class with some deferred summerborns who are turning 6 this month, so almost a year and a half older than she is. Dd is very good friends with one of them as she is naturally drawn to older children, but I don't see dd or the deferred NT deferred children being at any particular advantage/disadvantage. Where it clearly matters is when there is a disability and/or delay in a child's development. It's obvious that an extra year was necessary and helpful.

Mumoftwinsandanother · 18/04/2019 04:37

I think you need to go with your gut feeling OP. I say this as a member of the Summerborn FB group and a parent that has delayed her summerborn boy so he started school at compulsory school age rather than early at 4 years old (he is now yr 1 but "should" be yr 2). I do agree that its generally lovely to give children as long a time to play as possible but we live in a system where the majority of summerborn children start school at 4 and if yours feel ready (emotionally) /is excited to start and you feel uncomfortable delaying then I would go with the majority.

chocolateroses · 18/04/2019 16:28

Exhaustedmumof3pirates · 18/04/2019 16:37

Not at my boys school! He started in September and they have high expectations for maths, reading and writing. Every 6 weeks we have a review with his teacher and she tells us where he is (currently "failing" apparently at 4 years old 😔)

Curlybobs1 · 18/04/2019 21:09

My twins, due October, were born in August. They had to fight to survive, and deal with related preemie birth issues. Hounslow made me fight like a person possessed to have them admitted to school in CSA in their natural cohort. We and their preschool recognised that academically they could have started school, and coped/excelled in their adopted cohort, but emotionally they were not ready. I will never regret deferring their start in school to enable them to be emotionally and socially ready for the structure, tests and rigours of life in school that will form the majority of their childhood due to them starting in their natural cohort.

tattyheadsmum · 18/04/2019 21:27

My son is August born (2016) and due to start school September next year. He won't be - we've already spoken with private schools in our area, which will accept an out of cohort application. I've also spoken to a local academy (which controls its own admissions), and they've made positive noises about him starting in reception at compulsory school age (i.e. 5 and 3 weeks).

Anecdotes are fabulous, but have no evidential value. I'm a June born, working in the professions and have always been academically successful. My brother is also a summer born and has struggled academically all his life. Do some research - all the empirical evidence shows that summer born babies are typically the lowest performing in their year group.

I don't want my son to "cope" or "be fine", I want him to thrive and to love school.

tattyheadsmum · 18/04/2019 21:29

This reply has been deleted

Link not working

user1511042793 · 18/04/2019 21:31

My summer born (later than yours) struggled until year 4. Now she’s in the middle and doing well. Be prepared for years where they don’t achieve. But it all works out.

Ilikethinkingupnewnames · 18/04/2019 21:32

My 30th August ds was fine. I fairness I think it helped having older siblings but he is y11 at grammar and doing great.

tattyheadsmum · 18/04/2019 21:32

....well, that's embarrassing. Clicky link doesn't work - don't post after wine is my new Mumsnet motto.

Shootingstar1115 · 18/04/2019 21:39

It’s really rare for children to start a year later in the year below they should be in.

Most schools aren’t very supportive of it.

My daughter is a July birthday due to start in September too. She has speech delay, developmental delay and I’m worried sick. I have looked into her starting a year later but we have decided it would be best for her to go up in the correct age group for her age mainly because she will be going up with the children she’s used to already!

In the current reception class at the school she’s going to around 3/4 are summer birthdays which I think helps a lot. But maybe not so much for the children that are older in the year group though 🤔

If he’s ready for it, he will be fine. Reception teachers are usually fabulous at their jobs settling them in!

DS was a summer birthday, he’s doing okay now (nearly 8).

Amymoo1 · 18/04/2019 21:39

The fact that the 11 plus marking scheme gives extra marks for summer borns proves that differences still remain even by the end of primary between those born in September to those born in summer months.

thundercats192 · 18/04/2019 21:41

I'm late August born, so started school just after I was 4. Was always a high achiever, straight A*/As at GCSE, As at A level, went to Oxford for my undergraduate degree then did a masters and a PHD.

So academically, there was never an issue for me being the youngest in my year. However, physically, I was always the smallest in the year and picked last for sports etc, and I found being the youngest hard in that sense.

ichbineinstasumer · 18/04/2019 21:46

late August DS didn't have the option to defer a year and I probably wouldn't have chosen deferral at that stage as he was bright and used to attending nursery with no problems. However now he is doing GCSEs and I feel the extra year would have been really beneficial to him. He is quite immature and it does make a difference. I will encourage him to take a year out before university as it is a hindrance to be the youngest in the year group.

ooooohbetty · 18/04/2019 22:21

It depends on the child. Summer born children have started at the usual time with everyone else for many many years, it's only in the past few years people have started asking to defer entry. schools will take summer borns into consideration because they are used to doing this. My daughter is a summer born and at first she was behind the rest of her class. But she soon caught up, did very well and now has a great career and earns a lot of money. I wouldn't defer unless there was a medical reason.

Okaythen2 · 18/04/2019 22:25

My dc was born end of August. He’s been just fine starting school . He’s exceeding in most areas apart from handwriting

Absofrigginlootly · 18/04/2019 22:31

Urgh op you would not be holding them back you would be sending them at compulsory school age ! Sending them “in their expected year group” is actually sending them to school a whole year early.

The uk has one of the lowest school starting ages in the world and some of the poorest child mental health outcomes.

You won’t get a balanced view from MN as it’s very conservative/toe the line on this issue

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