To ask how much you're paying for DD's prom dress

[concernedforthefuture]

I have a younger DD (8) so have this to come . Colleagues were discussing prom dresses for their 16yr olds. I was staggered to hear that they (and most of their classmates) have all bought their dresses from a wedding shop... at a cost of around £250-£350 .

It's not just the dress though.. they're getting new shoes, accessories, nails, hairdressers, make-up artists (with trials too!) etc. I'm only in my late 30s but this seems so different to when I left school and feels like an absurd amount of money to spend on a 16 year old's night out. We don't live in an affluent area and these aren't wealthy families (to the best of my knowledge).

Is this the norm nationally? Had I best get saving

£5 off ebay for the frock size 6 - red silk full length free to next good home.

Shoes £40

Hair &photos by Daddy

Jewels by Granny

Makeup she did herself - via you tube & art classes.

Taxi by Mummy

Total £48.

My daughter isn’t going to hers, she’s performing in a concert which clashes. She’s going to a party at a friend’s house afterwards, and is wearing jeans, tee, cord jacket, and doc martens. She doesn’t do dresses, so wouldn’t have needed anything buying anyway.

I love the idea of the made to measure tux suit though, as would my daughter.

I've just spent £85 on her dress, my parents have paid £35 for her shoes and will pay £30 for her nails. Her hair and make up she's paying herself so probably another £40. To be honest though, I haven't had to buy any clothes for her for the last couple of years, she's got a part time job and buys her own things. I'm more than happy to pay it.
I ordered in a heap of dresses ranging in price from £40-£250. Luckily when they came in the prices weren't on them so she didn't know the price and just picked the one she liked the best. It's beautiful.

When I was a teenager my Mum spent £20 and bought a second hand dress off her friend without even asking me (we weren’t rich by any means but weren’t exactly strapped for cash). I was looking forward to going with her or friends to pick one out. Still look back and feel a bit sad years later. More of the experience then the cost!

£80here.My DD doesn't normally wear dresses but will for this one occasion.She also worries about cost so we will be selling it and some of my now vintage dresses to cover the cost.
She and her friends are doing their own make up and nails.Dd has short hair so just a cut the week before is all that's needed.Shr does need shoes but just wants simple flats she can wear again.
Some girls seem to be buying more dresses for the after prom party.Dd will be back in jeans and doc Martens for that,much more suitable as her year group are getting wasted at parties already so she won't slip on the vomit!

$50 in Macy's, in the US.
Evening bag $9.99.
Clear bra straps to go with strapless bra $6.90.
Sandals brand new $4.99 in Goodwill a few months ago.
Hair and makeup will be done at a friend's.
I will be chauffeuring.

Tickets to prom are $110.

DD and her friends are going to do brunch the next day I'll believe that when I see it

iwillkeepthishouseclean
How excellent for your DD! Hope she goes from strength to strength.

And earrings and pendant $16.99 iirc, that she loved and will get wear out of many times.

After prom parties here are in fields so everyone wears jeans and hoodies.

My cousin's daughter had all this including make-up artist. She's a pretty girl but the make-up made her look like an orange-toned, sharpie-browed 35-year-old. She seemed happy though...

In regard to shoes dont bother to spend a lot because they hobble in on them and then take them off.

One friend's DD had a full on, expensive prom dress which she wore with Converse - you couldn't see them under the skirt.

Another wasn't a huge fan of girly dresses so bought a plain black dress for £25 on eBay but spent 3x that on a pair of Irregular Choice shoes she knew she'd wear again and again.

My dd has sparkly converse to wear under her full length dress. This was my suggestion - as a teacher I see sooo many girls staggering about in heels and taking them off by 8.30, never to be worn again. This way she will have happy feet and a pair of shoes she loves and will wear many times.

I don't know why so many people think this is a recent American import. Our schools have had end of year proms dating back to at least the 70's when my parents left school.

I paid £150 for DD1 dress, she hasn't got shoes or a bag yet, and of course hair, nails, make up and tan to add on as well. So maybe another £150? It's also £120 for a room in the hotel that's holding the formal but I'm hoping she goes half's with her boyfriend for that

There's a massive difference with my DD's friends. They range from £25 from China to £300 from a bridal shop. Dd bought hers from Chichi London for £50 with a discount code. Her shoes are £25 and she's spent about £30 on accessories.

I don't know why so many people think this is a recent American import.

Think it's the word "prom". Ball or formal was the word used when I was growing up.

Think it's the word "prom". Ball or formal was the word used when I was growing up.

Ah, I see. It's the word people object to, not the event!

It's always been a formal up here

£90 from All saints. She was never in to the whole bridesmaid thing.

My little mortisha!

In regard to shoes dont bother to spend a lot because they hobble in on them and then take them off.

DD2 and all her friends are planning to wear Converse. You'll definitely see DD's shoes, her dress isn't floor length - but it's a solidarity thing. one of their group has survived leukaemia as a young child and now has permanent problems with her feet - so can't wear heels. So none of them are wearing anything but Converse with their dresses. It's adorable.

I 'm on my phone so can't see other posts let alone copy and paste. A couple if recent posters have mentioned that proms have been around for ages, it's just the name that's an American import.

That must depend on where you went to school and/or what kind of school you went to. I went to a bog standard comprehensive in the Midlands in the 80's. We had nothing resembling a "ball" or a "formal". I vaguely remember end of year discos that I didn't bother going to.

I hadn't heard of a prom until I watched Carrie on tv.

Rooms in the hotel are completely off limits for my DD's school. It's all good clean fun around here

Cariadlet and others suggesting this is an alien import from the US - proms are the traditional Irish 'debs' (short for debutantes' ball) in all but name.

Irish schools (particularly those in Dublin) have had debs dances after the Leaving Cert or at the end of the senior cycle of secondary school, with dinner in a hotel followed by dancing, for at least a century. Girls could spend money on several dresses for the debs season if they were invited to be the date of a few boys from boys' schools.

Entire towns turn out on the big evening to see the young people off for the night.
www.laoistoday.ie/2018/08/11/in-pictures-the-crowds-turn-out-in-droves-for-the-portlaoise-college-debs/

There are sections of serious newspapers devoted to debs style.
www.irishtimes.com/life-and-style/fashion/how-to-ensure-it-will-all-be-alright-on-debs-night-1.2302433
It's a long established Irish rite of passage.

Rooms in the hotel are completely off limits for my DD's school. It's all good clean fun around here

Not sure what you are suggesting tbh but DD stays in hotels every 6 weeks or so with her boyfriend so staying over at the location of their formal isn't strange at all. Nothing to do with school either. They are adults and can stay wherever they want.

www.laoistoday.ie/2018/07/29/in-pictures-serious-style-at-the-knockbeg-college-debs/
Serious style for the lads too.

And a few walking wounded.

(Classier dresses on the girls here imo)

Not suggesting anything wrt your DD, but highlighting a difference in approach that is possibly down to American culture.

The students here are not all adults (some are not yet 18) and in the US no drinking is allowed at a prom either as all are under 21. The prom is chaperoned by a few brave teachers and students can be ejected for drug or alcohol use. There is no access from the ballroom to hotel rooms that night. It's possible that parents or students will book rooms and students could re-enter the hotel through the main entrance and check in. Or go to a different hotel.

A lot of students go to a lakeside holiday home or Air B&B afterwards. This is their own business and they are welcome to make whatever arrangements they want.

The school just doesn't assume any responsibility for damage of any kind at what is a school sponsored albeit external event.

Last year we bought a dress on the sale rail reduced from £375 to £100. Shoes were £25. Hair was a favour from a friend and hair & nails were about £75.

The shop she got her dress from was closing down and we got a second dress for £175 reduced from £450, as we go on cruises with formal nights. Unfortunately that one is now far too big for her and she's only worn it once. The other one is backless and she's worn it several times, so it's worth it in terms of cost per wear.

Not suggesting anything wrt your DD, but highlighting a difference in approach that is possibly down to American culture

The 'it's all good clean fun here' suggested that staying in a hotel is dirty.

It's not. But yes probably a clear divide due to differences in law/culture.