To ask for help motivating me after a diagnosis

[MrMakersFartyParty]

I got diagnosed with a lifelong chronic health condition a week ago, don't want to say what as it could be outing but it's autoimmune. I have to start some horrible medication next week. I didn't cause this condition it's genetic.

It puts me at higher risk of cancers and heart problems. I'm currently overweight
Bmi of around 28.5, never been overweight before but had twins and struggled a bit.
I have the start of high blood pressure, and I have a history of an eating disorder as a teen and I would say I tend to binge in the evening when I'm tired after work.
Ive decided to start swimming 3 times a week, and I will eat healthily and avoid processed rubbish,I've been sticking to this all day and I just ruin it every evening!
What motivates you? I'm stuck in a rut as I'm anxious from my diagnosis, anxious about the future and knowing I need to change my lifestyle and then I seem to be more leaning towards food as comfort in the evenings.
I succeed if there's no rubbish for me to eat in the house, but my husband wants to eat crap in the evening which is totally fine.

I don't even know what I'm asking really, how do you motivate yourselves? I'm panicking that I'll have a heart attack and I didn't help myself.

Could your husband have his own cupboard space for his crap/junk/treats so that they are not so in your face.

I know he should be able to eat what he wants but under the circumstances I hope he is supportive and being a little discreet at the moment with his eating whilst you are dealing with this.

I mean, you wouldn’t smoke in front of your partner who has had to give up for health reasons!

Speak to your doctor and tell them your fears and set out a plan. You sound like you're ready to do it just scared. Fair decks to you for not letting it beat you and you'll love the swimming thing, just started back swimming a while ago and I feel great after it. I've no proper help for you but you can do this

Getting a diagnosis sucks. As in sucks big time. I was relatively young when I got my first diagnosis and I think I actually mourned my old life for a while!

I am on ‘high risk’ medications for my RA (which was a later diagnosis but still quite young < 30)
If you have an autoimmune disease that causes you inflammation then it can usually cause similar things to the medication (cancer, heart attack etc) but by being on the medication you will have a better shot of actually enjoying however much of a life you get. High risk medications usually come with many observations and your see specialists quite a bit (I go for regular blood tests and see multiple HCP a year for mine) so any side effects should be picked up quickly.

Sadly only time will help you. Help you realise that life does still go on even if you enjoy it in other ways.

Are you on Facebook? The ‘support’ groups are pretty good for asking questions, sharing fears etc.

PM me if you wanna chat about it!

I'm sorry OP. It's really crappy. I was diagnosed with RA at 21 soil I understand how horrible a chronic condition is. Agree, speak to your specialist. My medication controls the disease and makes future complications much less likely, I hope it's the same for you

@cakesandphotos sucks doesn’t it 😩
I have been really poorly the last few years till my medication was sorted. Who knew 🤷‍♀️ I thought you just got a bit achy 😂

Pmd you @thetrollfairy...its a very similar condition! Thanks all, I will go see my GP I think, I literally don't know how to sort myself out haha! I have motivation a bit but watching my husband eat a Toblerone kills me!

Can your husband support you? Your life has been forced into a change surely the least he can do is support you by not grouching whatever he likes each evening? Start small, a week, or a month first (i think I read it takes 28 days to create a new habit/break an old one no idea if that's true!) will he help you out?
I'd be bloody livid if my husband was eating a toblerone if I had struggled on salad all day! (Tbh I'd probably beat him to death with the toblerone then eat the evidence...)

*grouching = troughing

He says I should have more willpower!

I think your husband is being mean and uncaring.

Food is sustenance and things like Toblerone are treats and to eat it in front of you during this time is rather unpleasant of him.

Not saying he should go without but as this is a time of upset and struggle for you he could show you that he cares by being discreet in his snacking.

You have even told him directly and he has dismissed your feelings saying you lack willpower!

I wouldn’t want to be with such an unpleasant and unsupportive person.

Well I don't think he's unpleasant just a bit dismissive of my concerns with my diet at the moment.
Hes agreed to eat his crap in the kitchen but I feel quite harsh!

@MrMakersFartyParty don't feel harsh, you need to get established in your new routine. Not seeing him eating stuff you'd love is a start (a better step would be not having it in the house and him eating it at work though!!) you have to make a huge change to help yourself manage your chronic condition him eating in the kitchen is a small price to pay. I hope you enjoy swimming and that the diet changes help you a bit!

One day at a Time.

Every day is a Fresh Start.
Remember you're not a statistic. Your condition will follow its own development path so don't assume the worst.