Late last year we raised the topic of conversation about going on a big family holiday as I had not long had a baby and thought it would be lovely to all go away together. This included my parents, my husbands parents, my brother and sister in law and my brother in laws. Myself and my husband were well aware that not everyone would be able to come for various reasons and siblings dropped out due to work commitments. My parents in law were on board, my parents refused to give an answer for months holding up any plans, but eventually gave a half hearted excuse about being unable to go due to my mums work. AFAIK there was no other reason for refusing; everyone gets on well, it wasn’t a holiday outwith anyone’s budget, everyone had shown they were keen at some point. All fine, holiday arranged for five (myself, baby, DH and parents-in-law) and we went and had a lovely time.
Recently, I’ve discussed on other occasions with my mum about doing another trip. My circumstances have changed somewhat over the last year, I was very badly treated with my employment and ended up having to give up my job before returning after my maternity leave which has deeply affected my mental state and feeling of self worth. On top of that we moved house, which is a bit of a shithole and needs loads of work doing to it. In short, I need something to look forward to! When speaking to my mum about it, it was clear she wasn’t keen. Her excuse being that my parents are looking at going away with my brother and sister in law, to the same place we were arranging a holiday to with them last year. It was clear that myself and DH and our baby are not invited as all these discussions have taken place without us (we will all go to our parents once a week for dinner together, so plenty opportunity to raise the discussion).
As yet there is not any concrete plans but I’m feeling so hurt that we’ve been left out. I told my mum this in the discussion, but she brushed over it not denying that it’s true, they are purposely leaving us out. Our relationship as a family is good, maybe not great. I do often feel as though there is lots of jokes at my expense (laughing at me now not having a job, constant put downs about my previous failed marriage, about the weight I’ve put on since having my baby) but I’ve put up with it all not showing it’s upsetting me for the sake of not rocking the boat.
But I’m now thinking that none of them like me very much. They’ve been a great support to us and love my baby so much that I really don’t want to affect the relationship we do have. I know that I’m already in a delicate state of mind with everything that has been happening so maybe I’m reading into it all a bit too much, but AIBU feeling so left out?