To tell colleague to do one??

[womandear]

AIBU? I don’t work in Mondays. Recently flew transatlantic to a US office for a meeting that ran Tues- Thurs. I flew Saturday ( as did other colleagues) before because the flights are so much cheaper that they cancel out the hotel cost plus it helps with the jet lag. I have a family so miss the weekend with them but don’t mind cos I’m rubbish on jet lag/it’s a nice city to be in.
Here’s the AIBU. As I don’t work Mondays and we had nothing planned I didn’t go into the office that day, saw an old friend instead. Boss didn’t mention it. A full time colleague realised this and is giving me grief now, saying I should have come in, am taking the piss cos she went in to see her manager/team and worked the Monday while I was gallivanting around San Francisco. She’s threatening to tell line manager now as we have a similar trip coming up. Can I tell her to F off?? We do have a culture of presenteeism in the US offices so am worried that if she makes a big fuss about it it will look bad for me. I already get constant grief/ comments from US managers about being part-time.

However - 1) gave up my weekend. 2. Had nothing to be in office for I would have just been doing emails etc. 3. I wouldn’t have been paid or had time in lieu for the extra day.
Can I tell her to do one??

People don’t just work part time because of ‘home duties’. In some cases it is a choice and that is just as valid. OP YANBU, no pay = no work.

If she asks why you didn't go in on Monday, ask her why she didn't go in on Sunday. I don't know why people have this blind spot about part timers, I've seen it before. Just no understanding that they don't work on Friday (or whatever) any more than a full timer does on a Saturday.

Oh, posted too soon!

I wouldn't bother talking to her direct but would raise it with HR as a bullying issue. She has no right to be giving you grief, and if she actually said you were 'taking the piss' and 'gallivanting around', that is properly out of order. Let her tell the line manager. Tell her clearly, once, that you are not engaging with her on the issue any more, and then stick to it.

In fact I'd have a conversation with HR about the bigger issue, that you're frequently the subject of inappropriate comments and attitudes about your working hours. If they hire people to work P/T they need to manage it properly.

I don't know why people have this blind spot about part timers.

We have two staff members on 3 day weeks, and one on a 1 day week.

Occasionally, and especially around Bank Holidays, they shift their working days (and the day they work is largely irrelevant) so they don't lose holiday. I also manage a 4 day week woman, who occasionally switches her days to have a long weekend.

The bellyaching from staff about this flexibility is unbelieveable.

I think that you should have worked on the Monday and taken a different day as your 'non-working' day when you returned home as like a previous poster says, you should take the opportunity to be with your team whilst you are there. I think that you need to be a bit more flexible, especially in the environ where others don't have the luxury of being allowed part tie working.

Incidentally, part time workers were not allowed as many bank holidays as full time workers in the company where I worked - they were clearly not expected to go into an empty office so their number of vacation days was adjusted. You weren't allowed to say I don't work Mondays and Monday is a bank holiday, so I'm taking Tuesday off instead.

Colleague is PAID to work Mondays, you are not.. but its easier if you work this out in advance for next time with your line manager so you can put colleague in her place.
No one was expected to work on Sunday were they? Whether you have no childcare issues on a business trip is absolutely none of her business. She is not your supervisor is she? You are an effective employee by the sounds of it so in fact as they pay you less you are also more cost effective. Make sure your manager realises this but if they say they would like you to work on those days - make an arrangement.
Make sure you report her threats and complaints to your manager.
No one from your London office is going to want a member of their team being complained about in the US office. She is effectively bad mouthing how the London office is run - to people in the US office. That cannnot be a good thing surely? Point that out to your manager.

As someone who works a 4 day week on a global team...in the same circumstances I would have worked my non-working day and spoken to my manager about flexing that day back on my return to the UK.

Face to face time with my colleagues isn't commonplace so I try to make the most of any opportunity. It does mean I've travelled to some spectacular places without ever seeing more than the airport/train station/hotel/one restaurant outside the office though.

I think that you should have worked on the Monday and taken a different day as your 'non-working' day when you returned home as like a previous poster says, you should take the opportunity to be with your team whilst you are there. I think that you need to be a bit more flexible

^ This!

However, I also agree that your colleague should wind her neck in and stop gossiping to other colleagues and trying to cause bad feeling. Maybe remind her that part time hours also means part time salary, so you're not benefiting adversely.

But I'd also confront the work gossip. It's none of their business how you conduct yours unless they are a line manager.

I always had to point out that I got more done in 30 hrs a week than others that were in the office more

Just say it's none of their business and if they want time off maybe they should consider part time although she obviously won't be paid as much as she is currently ......

Out of interest, whats the US salary like compared to the UK? I've worked for US companies whilst being UK based and they paid less because of the benefits of working in the UK, like health care and holidays. If your situation is the same then you can rest easy that you are effectively paying for a better work life balance, and there's no need to feel bad that Americans have less time off if they are well paid for it/benefit in other ways.

As for trips, you really need to have the conversation with management before you go. It's their choice then and your colleagues can't whine, but do present your preferred option in the strongest terms! They cannot ask you to work a non work day without time off in lieu but make the choice theirs.

I would speak to your manager and ask how you should have handled it. I do think that you should probably have gone in and made the most of the opportunity to work face to face with colleagues, I would have been pretty surprised if one of my team did this without speaking to me first. I would happily have given them a day back in lieu later, though.

Mind you I get up at 4am twice a week for meetings with colleagues in other time zones, and don't really ever claim those hours back in lieu, so some might say I'm a mug for giving up that much of my time

Nope. I wouldn’t have gone in either. If you had flown on the Saturday, would she have come in on Sunday to do a meeting or whatever?

You are quite right and I wouldn’t take any shit from the line manager.

you want to take full advantage of the opportunites to work with others face to face that you don't usually see
Nonsense. So, should she work from 7am til midnight “making the most of it”? No, you work working hours and for her that’s not a Monday.

Plenty of contact opportunities on the two days she was in there.

She’s threatening to tell line manager now as we have a similar trip coming up.

Tell her to go ahead then. You don't work on a Monday nor did your manager mention that you were expected to work this Monday as a one off, so I can't see what anyone would do about it.

Every time she brings up your part-time hours, you need to bring up your part-time salary.

(US working culture is bonkers.)

Speak to your line manager and agree the process for next time.

Go earlier (miss your weekend, save lots of money for the company, have your usual Monday off)

Or travel later, cost more, but be in the office every day you're there.

If you agree on the process up front then she has nothing to speak to anyone about and you can stop worrying.

Let her tell your manager, you can say you don’t work therefore aren’t being paid for Monday’s. If the manager has an issue you can agree to flex it for next time?

The thing I never understand is why people don't address this ahead of time. I think you were perfectly in right not to go in, but if it was me, I'd have had ac conversation with my manager ahead of time to confirm that or to discuss whether it made more sense to swap my non working today to another one on my return. I think assumptions, even when they might seem reasonable ,are almost always a problem.

Travelling for business isn't some kind of treat that your employer is kindly giving you out of the goodness of their heart, it is work. You don't owe them anything over and above your contracted days.

I would be taking time off in lieu of the travel days and complaining to your manager/HR about the bullying attitude of your colleagues. More women than men work part time and discriminating against part timers can be seen as sex discrimination.

Thanks all. I didn’t discuss it with my (US) line manager ahead of time because it didn’t come up, she wasn’t available Monday anyway and it’s not been an issue before. The colleague making a fuss is UK based, different line manager but same overall team.
My US line manager is generally very supportive but can’t seem to get over the PT thing ( she inherited me) that’s why I was flying under the radar a little.
Taking a different day in lieu would have been frowned upon as it would have meant two days off in the same week so I would have deffo just worked an extra day.
Our USA colleagues actually get paid quite a bit more as they are in a city but U.K. officers are regional... but like I said they get little to no flexibility and are almost all in some kind of therapy ( which the company pays for worth eh health insurance). They’re very open about the level of stress BTW and ‘proud’ Of the great health cover that pays for therapy!
Yeah, I probably should have gone in to show willing but I just did not want to! I feel like they squeeze enough out of me as it is quite frankly and I wanted to see my old mate.

FYI, it you book you flight and hotel together for example with BA or expedia you do not need to have a saturday night stay to get a cheaper flight as the flight/hotel bundle removes the saturday night requirement for a "leisure" fare.

I’m kinda with your coworker on this (not that it excuses her behaving like a twat to you), I find it odd that you’d take your normal day off on a business trip when surely the point is you being there to do business with the overseas office in normal business hours for that office regardless of your normal routine then address toil when you get back.

I used to work mon-thurs 9-5 but a few times a year we had big fri-mon conferences out of town. We’d go down on thursday night. Even though Fri was my normal day off it never occurred to me not to show up to the conference on that day to go sightseeing. I’d take days in lieu for them.

I think you should at least clarify this with your boss, ie establish what hours you are expected to work while you are in the USA and that way if it is agreed you get your normal day off you’ll preempt any complaints made by your coworker and then can yes, tell her to do one.

In the UK, part-timers benefit from an EU directive - at least until Brexit - which says they should not be disadvantaged by their pt status.

That's the theory, anyway, but there are subtle cultural pressures which sometimes make it necessary to do more than your contract to maintain a good reputation. As a pt-time teacher, I regularly went on residential trips to Paris. There's no way I could have disappeared to sight-see on my own, just because it would have been my normal day off. No TOIL either, because I felt I had to teach my exam groups and colleagues would have had to cover for me.

I did put my foot down one year when the only afternoon I was in school was a Friday when there were no after-school meetings. This meant I missed staff/section/dept meetings for a whole year. These were part of the directed time in my contract, but I had to get my Union in to support my claim that directed time had to be reasonable. Not a popular move. Lots of digs from HoD and Headteacher.

It's unfair, but it does affect the way your colleagues/management will see you. Depends how much it matters to you. I agree with pps that it's better to argue your case beforehand than justify it after the event.

Every time anyone mentions your hours remind them that you only get paid for 4 days per week and they too can apply to only with and get paid for 4 days...