To be annoyed by my patronising mil?

[FloweryDreams]

My 16 month old can't talk yet, he mainly babbles or can say something that sounds like dada but doesn't associate it with dh. Getting a bit worried. My Mil has asked us why arnt we really worried about it and then asked if we actually talk to our him or do we just sit in silence with him all day. Of course we talk to him. AIBU to be annoyed and think it's really patronising and a bit insulting. She iften talks to us like we are children. Also how worried should I be that he isn't talking yet?

carol Not policing at all, but it’s fairly obvious that at 16 months there is no issue

@Nicknacky in the interests of NOT frightening the OP, which I didn't in the first place, I will not continue further with this discussion with you. My posts stand, others can make up their mind about them. Perhaps you could address your concerns to the many other posters who also suggested the OP mention it to her HV instead if you wish to continue in your self appointed post policing role?

OP I hope you're still reading. A mention to your HV can only reassure and if in the very unlikely event there is something else going on then I would like to say that having your concerns noted very early on is never a bad thing.

Indeed hobnobs.

The first partworryis okay.
The second partinsulting youis unacceptable.
She is free to think that. But you do not need to hear that. Would she say such a thing to a stranger? Would you let a stranger through your door who spoke to you that way? I would tell her straight out that she may not say such things in the future, they are unacceptable, and you will not tolerate them.

Thanks for all the replies, glad it isn't something to worry about (it's my first baby and no other children in the family etc so had no idea if it's normal or not). Will definitely call the hv office and talk to them about it. Definitely have an issue with mil, but I just bite my tongue to keep the peace. Not sure what to say or do before it builds up and I say something I regret.

Absolutely nothing to worry about. Any child talking at 16 months is the exception, not the rule. My dgs didn't really start saying much until he was 3 and a half! Now he won't stop talking!

My youngest is dyslexic. My MIL asked if we read to him.

This is despite knowing me for 20 years +, my literature degree, wall to wall books, read to my 3 DCs every night because I liked it.

She is the most self- absorbed woman I’ve ever met and I know that the problem is her not me. Learn the lesson now or it will cause you a lot of stress and anxiety down the track. Ignore, ignore, ignore and trust yourself.

DD didn't say a word till she was well over 2.

She would point if she wanted something and usually was found at the side of the room looking on.

Then she went to nursery one day and suddenly started speaking like an adult.

She went from silence to full sentences.

Ds babbled till he was 4. I could understand him but no one else could. He was a late developer, but he did start walking at 9 months.

Both are well adjusted teenagers.

I wouldn't worry too much at this stage

my son didnt speak and was labeled non verbal at 3, nothing wrong he just didnt feel the need to talk, hes 10 now and you cant shut him up, he talks non stop, and i mean non stop a total chatterbox
so i wouldn't worry until there is something to worry about

TheSerenDipitY

I have a friend who was going frantic that her dd was non verbal.

When she was asked years later why she didn’t talk her answer was she didn’t feel like it😅

My middle son was 3 before he said a word and then he said a full sentence

All children are different but contact you HV to discuss any concerns. DD is 8 months and does mama and dada but utterly refused to sit up and has only just started rolling. 2 of her nct friend are already crawling. They all develop at their own rate but it useful to flag concerns early so any tests can be done. Tell MIL to bog off unless she actually wants to do something helpful rather than just criticising you

He’s a boy, they take longer to talk. It’ll come don’t rush him.

My DS was a bit late starting with words-over 2. He's doing his A levels this year.

It's a vexatious question, designed to wind you up.

Next time she asks if you talk to him, try a crisp ' Of course we do, don't be silly' and move on.