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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think I've lost the battle to get them out today?

46 replies

OutdoorApathy · 14/04/2019 14:16

Given that my 9 year old DS is sat on DD's quilt (sorry, picnic blanket) bottle feeding her doll?

DH is working, its cold, I've tried several times but they say they want to stay in. I've turned off all screens and in protest the toy kitchen that was last touched 3 years ago has been brought out and set up in the middle of the living room. AIBU to give up trying to get them outside when all they will do is moan and be miserable anyway?

OP posts:

ThisIsTheEndgame · 14/04/2019 15:02

We have been out and busy every day this week. I have, alas, had to go out today as I had booked to give blood but it's bloody cold out there and I'm not going out again. We went to a farm yesterday, it was freezing with icy rain and we didn't have fun. The kids were tired and need a day resting. When DS wakes from his nap shortly they will have a hair washing bath then I will get out the playdoh and start on the Yorkshire puddings for dinner.

Mixedupmummy · 14/04/2019 15:04

my 3 dc are very young and I'm usually in the camp of we need to get outside everyday even if it's only 20 minutes. but we're having a pj day today. we've been out doing something everyday this week and I cannot be bothered wrangling them into clothes and out. its a bit windy and cold here today so I don't feel too bad. I think the odd lazy is fine especially if they're happy and entertaining themselves

RomanyQueen1 · 14/04/2019 15:08

we are doing stuff, dh and dd music practice and the odd bit indoors, but we aren't out today.
It's nice when you've been super busy to just hang out and be.

hammeringinmyhead · 14/04/2019 15:11

You seem to have introverted children. It's Sunday, chill out! I haven't even got dressed today and my baby is happily napping in his bouncy chair.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 14/04/2019 15:13

My eldest is eight going on fifteen. Full on strops if I try and get him outside.
My thinking is that he works hard at school and needs to rest and recharge during the holidays. I don't let him slob about for the entire holiday but constantly dragging him out when he really doesn't want to just leads to misery all round.

Original poster

OutdoorApathy · 14/04/2019 15:14

Well, they're asking for screens now so I've said DS can take the bins out, DD can pick up the leaves which have fallen from the plants, they can sort the socks together and then they can have screens again. Oh and I've opened all of the windows so they've had fresh air for 15 minutes

To be fair, there's no-one else in the park either, I can see it from our bedroom and can't hear a sound even with all the windows open.

Butterymuffin only if the weather is really bad, and then he'll do an hour or so sport indoors. Yesterday DH spent practically the whole day on the computer having given the DC the screens and then went for a run late afternoon.

OP posts:

ILoveMaxiBondi · 14/04/2019 15:14

MN is so funny.

No-one is actually bothered about a Sunday indoors are they?

Asta19 · 14/04/2019 15:19

I used to hate being “forced” outside as a kid. I’ve always been happier indoors. Nowadays I can happily go a whole week without stepping outside my front door! (I don’t have young DC). Not everyone wants to be outside at every opportunity. Your DC have been doing sports all week, let them relax.

Original poster

OutdoorApathy · 14/04/2019 15:21

This sounds more like obsession than guilt to be fair.

Definitely more of a guilt rather than obsession. I have absolutely no desire to go out, but I know that I'm rather on the lazy side so was debating if it was clouding my judgement or not. And if all non-lazy parents would be ensuring that their DC had some nice bracing fresh air and exercise. Me, I'd hibernate all winter if I could get away with it.

OP posts:

ShabbyAbby · 14/04/2019 15:25

@OutdoorApathy

You are not lazy
I have been known to not go out all weekend, not once
I have friends who have not left the house for a week

I need a day a week at home regularly to recharge. Maybe your DCs need that too?

ArchieStar · 14/04/2019 15:29

OP don’t be swayed by the concept of “children need to go outside every day!!” They really don’t. People forget that children aren’t robots and are actually young humans. I don’t know anyone who needs to go outside and do something every day, IMO that isn’t healthy. Hell even 2 days inside isn’t damaging, especially if there’s only minimal screen time included in that.

Springwalk · 14/04/2019 15:32

My dc are just a little older than yours ( and teens) and I let them direct their own time. If they feel like going out we take the dogs for a long walk through the fields where we live. Maybe a run or a game of tennis.

Other times they are just desperate to chill and have some down time. We light a fire, watch a film, cook and play a game.
I am firmly in the camp that we need up teach children to relax. I have friends with burnt out over scheduled children and it taught me all I need to know about ignoring the need to relax. It is essential that we all decompress, or mh issues will be the next problem along with other problems.
Go out for a walk if you need fresh air, invite everyone along and leave it up to them to decide. Autonomy is important op even at a young age.

PeachyPrincess · 14/04/2019 15:35

Lazy to spend a Sunday indoors? The day of rest? Goodness me

Springwalk · 14/04/2019 15:35

I have children of a similar age to yours and a teen btw, as they get older they self regulate.

AventaRizon · 14/04/2019 15:38

Give 'em a break - they want to stay at home. What's the point of toys if they are never indoors long enough to play with them?

I've spend 4 hours on the M1 today, I'd much rather have been lolling about

megletthesecond · 14/04/2019 17:10

We have to get out every day too. Maybe a day at home every few months. It helps my IBS if I can have a walk.

MrsBertBibby · 14/04/2019 17:18

Oh jeez you are my mother.

My most precious early memories are of when she was on call all weekend sleeping at the hospital, and we could mooch around all weekend with our dad, reading, "helping' him fix household machinery, or just being. I remember with crystal clarity scuffing around on the kitchen floor with my socks half pulled off thinking "oooh I'd never get to do this if mum saw me".

Let your kids chill! It's really good for them.

SchrodingersBrexit · 14/04/2019 17:26

It's bitterly cold out, stay inside, stay warm

twosoups1972 · 15/04/2019 13:26

I am firmly in the camp that we need up teach children to relax. I have friends with burnt out over scheduled children and it taught me all I need to know about ignoring the need to relax. It is essential that we all decompress, or mh issues will be the next problem along with other problems

I do agree with this but there is a huge difference between being over-scheduled and getting out for a bit of fresh air. It's about balance. I definitely believe kids need time at home just to chill and be or potter about but all day every day is too much. Fresh air and exercise are also important for mind and body.

eddiemairswife · 15/04/2019 13:49

I have pale skin and bags under my eyes; my mother put this down to: a)constipation
b)"always got your nose in a book"
c) not enough fresh air

LazyFace · 15/04/2019 14:13

I got up at 2 am to watch GoT. I don't have the will to fight them today, they have been hunting zombies on the xbox for an hour.
(Did chuck them out onto the trampoline in the morning, within half an hour they were arguing.)

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