To not get people who are hot and cold with you?

[coffeegranuals]

I have a friend who was all over me like a rash last year. We would do everything together and it was great fun. We even went on holiday to Japan together.

Now all of a sudden, she can't be bothered to really reply to my messages. It's always about her, and she's suddenly very cold. We had planned to go on holiday again this year and whenever I ask her about it I get the "cab vibe". I have no idea what I have done wrong!

To be honest, I should have seen it coming. She would spend a lot of time complaining about her old friends and how she hates them over something pretty insignificant. So maybe yes, she is just the sort that gets a new friend until she moves on...

Whilst I have plenty of other friends, and people I can grow closer to it just seems a real kick in the foof.

oh god I hate this sort of behaviour so YANBU.

I just don't bother with people like this. I'll be fucked if i'm bothering with people who are nice to me when they feel like and not at other times.

It's so difficult to read isn't it! If I've been a tit, just tell me

(also that should say cba* in the op)

Oh I hate all that. At least you know where you are with a full on cunt.
I'd find a new friend.

Could she be struggling with and trying to hide a mental illness?

I don't get it either. Though I really hate drama and am not really drawn to people who have big fall outs with friends. If it's a one off fair enough but if it's a pattern for them its bound to catch up with your friendship eventually

Yeah I agree, she is just repeating her own past again

Happened to me recently. I have mentally repositioned the friendship. I like her a lot but thinking about it she has a lot of friendship groups/circles and seems to have different personas for these other friendships. I think I fulfill a need to be a particular person for her.

Now I’ll see her if it suits me as well but I have lowered my expectation of her and the friendship. I wouldn’t turn to her for emotional support etc.

It was sad because it takes me a long time to let someone in.

I can honestly say I’ve lost more sleep and been upset more over female friendship than men/boys in my life.