When we were buying our first house my DM offered to lend us a significant amount of money. This was her idea as my DH's salary would not be counted in our mortgage calculator as it was a stipend rather than a salary, although he actually earnt more than I did. This loan was agreed with a time frame to repay which we will have no problems meeting when the time comes. All fine.
This week she offered to give us £5000 to do up a bit of our garden so my DS can play in it. To clarify we have another separate fenced part but the dogs are allowed in that part. We have a week off in summer and plan to sort out this bit then, and it will cost nowhere near £5000. She also wanted us to use her builder to do any works. I said thank you, but no thank you as we would rather do it at our own pace and don't imagine it will cost a lot anyway.
She kept pressing saying she wanted to do something nice as we work hard, can't take it with you etc. I then said if she really wanted to she could deduct this from the amount we owe her, but we really didn't need the money for the garden. She didn't want to do that. Which is fine, but AIBU to be confused and think if she wanted to give the money it doesn't matter what we spend it on?