To be annoyed at my parents for wasting money then crying poverty

[CatsCatsCatsCatsCats1980]

Over winter they complained they couldn't afford to put the heating on. My brother lives away, currently going through some personal problems. They wish they could visit him but "they can't afford it".

In the last few weeks they have bought a new tumble dryer & new kettle. They've been on four days out dining out three of those. A couple of weeks ago mum bought herself a new handbag. She buys new clothes, decides she doesnt like it then instead of taking it back just throws it in the wardrobe. Just recently they have started driving to a farm shop about 45 minutes away just to buy potatoes.

What they actually mean is they can afford stuff they just choose to spend it on other things.

It's upto them what they spend money on but when they complain to me especially about how upset they are not being able to afford to visit my brother I have to really bite my lip.

AIBU to let this wind me up?

Its none of your business really. Up to them what they prioritise

A few of DHs family members do this, plead poverty about food shops and bills but the difference is they do hint to get monetary help from DGM who is quite affluent but lives very frugally bless her.
So while she worries about spending too much on her own comforts, she is bailing them out as they claim they are brassic. Yet they can afford £250 beauty Treatments, expensive meals out and one just spends his housing benefit meant for rent on himself and DGM ends up paying his rent.
Its disgusting and drives DH mad, he's tried mentioning it but they don't change.
I'd just say something next time they moan about being skint about their recent purchases and how much they could've saved. Don't expect them to listen though.

You are assuming that they don't have the money.

They are probably saying this because it's unacceptable to openly admit you cba to see your son and makes them look good.

Yeah my real dad is like this. Always spends more than he has coming in despite having a fantastic income. My stepdads are both excellent with money though.

Op you've literally described my parents. Can't afford to put the heating on or lights on but go for weekends away every 6 weeks, meals out constantly and random nights in hotels because they are bored and constant shopping trips. My mum has never worked a day in her life when there's Absolutely nothing stopping her getting a job.

Like you say, they can spend their money on what they want but it's the poverty pleading they do that winds me up.

They need a new car as it keeps breaking down ans the repair bills are crazy but they have 'can't afford' to save up for one.

Don't have any answers for you but just wanted to say I know how you feel!

Haven't read the whole thread so no idea what to suggest with your parents but I can sympathise as it seems a thing with some people to not ' prioritise' their ' money.
It's strange to me but some people just can't seem to do it!

Can't afford it is usually the same as it's not a priority for me

My ndn used to talk about being poor pensioners. Then when the financial crash came and the only good thing about it was lower interest on our mortgage, they whinged because the interest on their savings used to pay for 2-3 month long holidays per year....and now it didn't!

@nutsfornutella

They are probably saying this because it's unacceptable to openly admit you cba to see your son and makes them look good

You've hit the nail on the head.