Petty revenge

[Dan68]

I’ve lived next door to a neighbour from hell for almost two years. She gets drunk most nights and creates absolute scenes with her husband-mostly involving her screaming at him. Its terraced housing, so sound does carry but her behaviour is deplorable and wakens me most nights-like right now, even. The broken sleep is killing me, I have a very stressful load on right now and this is just adding to it.

Anyway, there is light at the end of the dark dark tunnel-we are moving into our new home within the next few weeks which is great for many reasons, but escaping her next door is a big one.

What petty-and legal-revenge can I exact upon her before we go? Help me mumsnet. All my ideas will have me in the jail!

Don't glitter bomb her until after you have moved. Send one from a different postal area from where you live.

Give her time to forget about it, and do it again, another postal area. Then every few months, Christmas every year.

If you really hate her (I don't recommend this) send some gift wrapped sugar free gummy bears, a big pack. They must be sugar free.

Sugar free gummy bears? Is that because they're awful or some other sinister reason?

Haha definitely maggots from a fishing shop around her property they’ll find their way in any cracks

Post her a beautifully wrapped box of Maltesers. After replacing the Maltesers with prawns... 😈

wheeltrims

Sugar free gummy bears? Is that because they're awful or some other sinister reason?

They cause explosive diarrhoea

I know I should be ashamed to admit this. I'm not.

Our neighbour was horrid. She frequently blocked our drive, threw rubbish into our garden, filled our bins, swore at my mother for daring to look her direction. I'm sure she was nuts.
One month before we moved she had her garden landscaped, the skip partially blocked our drive, mess and noise etc. She crowed loudly to anyone who would listen about how much it had cost and the ideal plant formation .
The night before I left I sprinkled six packs of mixed wild flower seeds and watered them in to her borders along our fence.

Don't waste your time. People like her are too thick and self centred to notice any prank you could pull. She's got bigger problems, move on and enjoy your new home.

I seriously considered sending someone the tube of glitter that pops out everywhere. I didn’t want to waste the money on the asshole though. Such a great idea!!

I absolutely sympathise, OP. I lived with alcoholic, loud, abusive neighbours who made our life a living hell, but I-almost-would thank them now because we were forced to move due to them, earlier than we wanted to. Now, however, I’m in a much nicer house than I would have had if I’d stayed. At the time, I wanted to nail his feet to the ground and take swinging shots at his stupid fucking head with an extremely heavy Le Cruset frying pan. He was a cunt, as well as physically abusive to his gf.

Simply that is outstanding!

The night before I left I sprinkled six packs of mixed wild flower seeds and watered them in to her borders along our fence.

Absolutely brilliant, @SimplyPut, love it! 💕

Years ago, my mum having been driven to the edge of sanity by the nasty individual next door to her (loud thumping music all through the night, every night) got out of bed, put on her dressing gown, went outside at 4am and poured a bag of sugar into the petrol tank of his prized beach buggy.

I doubt she just yells at him for fun, poor woman can't be very happy surely
Would you say that about a man shouting at a woman!
What an outrages thing to say!

@wheeltrims

Sugar free gummy bears? Is that because they're awful or some other sinister reason?

There are some amusing Amazon reviews on them, and warnings.

“Does anyone else see the irony of Avengers Assemble post and her user name??”

I laughed out loud! 😂

Off to educate myself!

Sign her up for a load of junk mail.

Years ago, my mum having been driven to the edge of sanity by the nasty individual next door to her (loud thumping music all through the night, every night) got out of bed, put on her dressing gown, went outside at 4am and poured a bag of sugar into the petrol tank of his prized beach buggy.

This reminds me of an incident in my old neighbourhood 20ish years ago. We had two pieces of scum living next door who'd play loud music etc at all hours of the day and night. The police and the landlords were worse than useless. (The landlords were the original neighbours/owners of the house who then rented it out to a succession of their feral friends).

But one day one of the scumbags called out to my husband and asked if he knew anything about the slashed tyres on the vehicle of the worse offender. This vehicle was his pride and joy and the type driven by low life scumbags like this. DH ignored him. But within a week they'd both packed up and moved out. Typical gutless bullies who can dish it out but not take it.

Even now I still truly wish I knew who did this so I could've thanked them and asked why they didn't do it sooner. I doubt it was random as the vehicle was always parked on their property slightly out of sight depending on the angle.

I had the exact same neighbours living above me for years and to make matters worse the mother was extremely violent with severe MH problems, so a normal person would be too afraid to complain.

The police were called out a lot - think midweek and stupid o'clock in the morning.

I bumped into to her about 6 months after I left and she was a wreak, the neighbours that replaced me were next level loud and lethal, they were making her ill and she was terrified of them.

These things just have a habit of working themselves out, apparently.

Leave him a parcel on his porch... this man is my hero.

I doubt she just yells at him for fun, poor woman can't be very happy surely.

Yes, a woman screaming at her husband night after night, she must be the victim

I snuck into my neighbours garden the night before I moved and planted Japanese Knotweed all over.