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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

It's another car seat one...

9 replies

Fannydango · 10/04/2019 19:20

After a trip to the park the other day, my friend offered to take my 2 kids back to hers for a couple of hours while I ran some errands. I asked if she needed to borrow a car seat - she said no, she had an extra booster in her car (she has 2 kids). I assumed that meant her eldest (8) would go in the front without a car seat and she'd put mine in the back with car seats which is what happened. I don't like kids going in the front, particularly without a car seat but what she does with her children is not my business.

However, when she dropped my kids home, my eldest (8) was in the front without a car seat. I felt really uncomfortable about it but didn't say anything as it was done by then plus she'd done me a favour and I didn't want to be seen to be complaining or have an awkward conversation. And it would come across as a judgement of her, obviously. I just don't think it's safe and I don't even know if she'd turned the air bag off.

She's always offering to take my kids out etc which is really lovely of her but I really don't want her to if it means my kids possibly travelling in this way. Do I say something or do I just avoid any possibility of her driving my kids in the future?

OP posts:
Fr3d · 10/04/2019 23:24

You only turn the airbag off if rear facing.

Next time she offers, I would give her your spare car seats and make sure they all (friend and your kids) know your kids have to use them.

TheInvestigator · 10/04/2019 23:27

But she said she had an extra seat, so why did someone need to sit without a seat?

I would raise it. Just say that next time, you'll need to insist she takes on of your car seats because you're really unhappy that you're 8 year old was in the front seat without a car seat. Its so dangerous.

TriciaH87 · 10/04/2019 23:36

My youngest is 8 will be 9 on Sunday. His 137cm tall so no longer requires a seat by law. Sometimes sits in front. If however your child is below the required height I suggest telling her to take your in future.

tor8181 · 10/04/2019 23:49

my 8 y old has never ever been in a car seat as birth to 6 we didnt drive so bussed every ehere,(we even came home from hospital via a bus and he was in my arms)

when we got a car 2 years ago he was well over the limit for both so i didnt buy one

hes now 5ft 1 and 125 pounds and hes not 9 till end of july

unless you have a very small 8 y old i wouldnt be that upset over it

garkowl · 11/04/2019 09:14

@tor8181 But your 8 yo is really exceptionally tall for his age... Most 8 yo would still be below 135cm...

Fannydango · 11/04/2019 17:28

I thought the airbag had to be off if a child was in the front because it can injure children?
Yes, she said she had a spare seat which would’ve meant she only had three seats but 4 kids but because she said that, I assumed she’d use it for one of my kids. And she did - both my kids used a seat on the way to her house - just not in the way back it seems...

OP posts:
Fr3d · 11/04/2019 17:38

Only turn off airbag for rear facing seat. For a front facing seat, push seat back if possible.

ems137 · 11/04/2019 18:34

My kids would always be in the safest seats in my own car so I can understand why your DD wasn't tbh. However, if you don't want them travelling without a car seat I think you'll just have to give her yours for the journey and just say "can you make sure she's in her seat please, I'm paranoid about these things and like to know she's safe". Nothing wrong with that

Fannydango · 11/04/2019 18:44

Ems137 yes, I think I’ll use those words. Although it’s annoying that so many parents don’t seem to realise the danger of not using a car seat and I’m the one who has to feel stupid for mentioning it!

OP posts:
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