To give up work ?

[GetMeOut]

Just trying to make sure I don't do something stupid....
I am a single parent to DT( 17). Their father has never helped financially, so I have have worked FT pretty much the whole time.
I am worn out with work and home. One twin is doing ok at 6th form, but the other one has managed to leave school without any qualifications and needs my help with the next step in life. Me being out of the house for nearly 12 hours every day means they can avoid life/ responsibilities etc. Think anxiety issues as well as school/ learning issues.
My job has changed dramatically over the last 18 months and it has gone from a job I loved to a job I hate. The company has now been taken over by a large American company ( who I used to work for over 15 years ago and I left because I was so stressed out ). Takeover only happened 10 days ago and things are already changing quickly. I can feel all the stress coming back already.
I have ( some how ) savings to fall back on and a sufficient pensions provisions from old job and current job ( I have been working for 37 years in one shape or another) which I can access in 18 months time. I won't be rich but I will be able to pay all bills and have a pot for boiler/ car breaking down etc and small type holidays /weekends. I have never done big holidays or anything flashy anyway so I don't think I will be giving anything up. DT who is in 6h form wants to go to universal so he will have to take full student loan ( tuition and maintenance and should qualify for full maintenance if I stop work now )
I am worn out. I think I need to be around for my teenagers.
I want to give up my job. Now. I have lots of creative hobbies I want to peruse but probably won't be able to earn anything from them. Am I missing anything ? AIBU ?
WWYD ?

If you live in UK you can check how many years you have paid NI which are needed to receive full state pension on www.gov.uk
You can see how much pension you will receive and the date
Instead of leaving your job, why don't you book a holiday ? Or start a new hobby, something that interests you outside work
I would suggest taking financial advise before quitting your job, because 54 is young to retire
Universal Credit is approx £73 a week for a single adult (extra money may be paid if you rent property)

Thanks BlueMid - I did a full financial review with my advisor last summer when things were starting to get me down. That was then then that I found that I already 37 years of NI contributions ( the max being 35 now ) as my part time jobs that I had when I was 15/16/17 all counted !
I am having a week off now ( albeit at home as I don't like spending money ) hence I am thinking about it even more and not looking forward to going back next week

Thanks Mrs Moonie1970. for you. It's not easy on your own and I think there is a tendency to doubt yourself even more as you have to be all the roles. Teenage problems seem very real as well and adult type problems have to be dealt with somehow without adult type resources. I also feel that I have taken my eye off the parenting role.

If you can afford not to work and don’t want to work it’s a no brainer isn’t it?

Living in the Western world everyone is brainwashed to think someone’s worth is only through paid work and we all need to be working until we’re 80

There is so much more to life. Of course it’s a totally different situation if you HAVE to work and need the money but not everyone is in that situation for a whole host of various reasons. Do whatever makes you happy, you don’t need to justify yourself to anyone. Life is too short.

When the takeover was announced I just assumed that I would be made redundant as some posters have mentioned. Happy days ! However, they have now made this clear that this won't be happening. They are short staffed ( as we were for the last 18 months ) and they have a made it very clear they want all of us ( to work all hours )
I think I am concluding; looking for some part time work whilst keeping my current job ( maybe in a different industry closer to home ), plus volunteer work to include my DC which will hopefully lead to opportunities for them and me.
But taking the plunge to change things somehow.
Thank you everyone

I don't blame you one bit, and I think you're right to start thinking about getting out. However I'd hold on for a little while yet, with an eye on potential redundancies, as PP have said, and also try to save for a few more months while you're still in work. I know you have savings now, but you could see an extra few months cash as your one off relaxing holiday money when you give up work and then, perhaps, keep an eye out for a PT job you can leave behind you at the end of the day. Don't forget seasonal work as well. I know someone who left a well paid, high stress job in similar circumstances as you, and now she works in the gift shop at a local National Trust property in the summer months. She loves it.

As long as you have a good forecast of what pension and lump sum you might get in 18 months and are sure you can take it at that age, and you know what your state pension age is, and your savings can replicate your gross salary, I would do it. You can get another job of any kind any time in the next five years, so it doesn’t have to be all or nothing.

At 54 you may have another 40 years ahead of you. If you have a final salary pension then it will keep going. If it is a pot going into drawdown it might not.

I'd be looking for a much more stress-free job so that you can still have an income for a bit longer. If it doesn't work out then you could have retiring now as plan B.

This resonates with me. No advice but good luck!

I currently have 70 live vacancies sat on my desk I cannot fill, job around the uk, Europe & USA. If you hate this one leave and find another, the job market is candidate short

does your 17 need your help though? woudnt he be better to make his own choices? and it is all him for you to focus on, would that help?

go looking for part time work though op, good plan if you can afford it

this could have been me a few years ago - I did leave my job and now work from home 3 days per week and absolutely love it. I do not have as much money to spend but that means I no longer waste it on frivolous non- essentials that are utterly pointless.

ideally I would never work again but I did not quite have enough to do that but this is a good compromise.

I know I do not have much of a pension but I know what it is like to be really poor - and it was the happiest and most fulfilling time of my life so I know I can make my life great no matter what my income level - but working part time allows me to live comfortably, not touch my savings and still be contributing to a bit more pension. It feels like that realistic compromise. My pension does not in anyway need to match my current salary for me to be able to live happily.

There is no point being utterly miserable working to make money for a future you simply cannot predict. Sensible awareness and precautions for the future yes - but live in the moment - you simply do not know what is round the corner.

Basecamp65 - thank you for your feedback. This is extremely interesting and definitely resonates with me.

How much has the job changed? In your place I would probably stick it out a bit longer, get certified for stress and then leave and sue for constructive dismissal on the ground that the job had completely changed from what you had been contracted to do and then come to a settlement.

Check the grant situation as they look back two years, so application for finance for this year 18/19, looked at our position tax year15/16 (which messed up my ss application)

It sounds like you need to change for the good of your own mental health as well as being around more for your children. If redundancy really isn't on the cards then I'd be looking oking for something less stressful part time close to home to bridge the gap - don't underestimate the challenge of moving from full on full time to nothing.

Thanks jelliebean. Yes, that is exactly how I feel and I appreciate your advice. That was what I was wondering about; I don't want to accidentally give myself even more mental health issues

Sorry, jelly belly, not bean

Is a career break an option? I am a similar age and similar position. I need time and energy to focus on a family situation but can't afford to give up work for a good few years yet.
I can however manage a year off. I will review where we are after that.
In your position a career break would give you the time you need. There would be nothing to stop you looking for other jobs and resigning during the year

Ted27, thank you, that's an interesting idea. I hadn't really considered it, but I will give it some thought.

I am a similar age to you, a bit older, and I know that there is no way I could work full time in my particular roleI know a lot if people do but I would be exhausted. I work part time which means I will be able to carry on working a lot longer. I understand you would be unable to do your existing time part time, a lot of jobs are like that, but I would recommend looking around for something you enjoy on a part time basis.