Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if anyone lives in an area where there have been stabbings

51 replies

JuniorAsparagus · 10/04/2019 07:42

And is there any advice about how to stay safe?
I have a 52 year old black male friend. He is deaf, autistic and lives alone.
There have been two stabbings in the area of London where he lives.
He is already a vulnerable adult, and I am worried about his safety.
I live in a different part of the country.

OP posts:
IceIceCoffee · 10/04/2019 07:44

I’m in a city that’s had stabbings not London and I haven’t come across any advice tbh. I’m not even sure if any has been released.

OddBoots · 10/04/2019 07:50

Anywhere urban will have stabbings, sadly, some rural places too. I live in a place with lots, I teach my children to keep themselves to themselves, that their belongings are less valuable than their lives, there is no shame in running away and NEVER carry.

That said, they are able bodied (one has ASD) so not as vulnerable. In some places the Bobby Van scheme will come and give personal advice to vulnerable adults about personal and home safety.

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 10/04/2019 07:51

To be honest, he doesn't sound like the demographic to get stabbed. He's too old for the gang stabbings, and stabbings at his age are almost always personal and related to friends/acquaintances getting drunk and falling out. Unless he has associates who carry knives, regardless of area, his risk is low.

The stabbings in Edmonton were very unusual in being seemingly/possibly random.

Fairylea · 10/04/2019 07:54

I used to live in South London and there were always stabbings and muggings, hardly any ever got reported- when I was mugged it didn’t even make the local newspaper. I think the media is just reporting on it more and picking up on it more so that’s definitely worth keeping in mind.

You can get personal alarms linked to either the police or a personal carer for particularly vulnerable people. My mum used to have one- it was a little button on her wrist that she used to press if she needed help (mainly for falls but I suppose it could be used for any type of emergency) and it would ring someone to come urgently. Lots of councils offer reduced rate schemes like this for people that need them.

Pk37 · 10/04/2019 07:54

I did live in South Harrow where someone was killed with a machete last week but thankfully not now.
Knife crime has always been about and sadly you can’t even say “make sure you’re home before it gets dark” as some of them are in broad daylight.
I think if it’s a knife point robbery then don’t fight ,just hand over your wallet/ purse etc and hopefully they’ll run off .
I don’t really have any other advice as at the moment it’s everywhere

GinUnicorn · 10/04/2019 07:55

Yes I used to. There was one in the block of flats next to me before I moved. (Non fatal thank God)

Only advise - avoid gangs really. Your friend isn’t the age range that is most at risk. The media might make it seem really unsafe but I lived in one of these hotspot areas for a long while and never had trouble. Try not to worry too much.

Hoppinggreen · 10/04/2019 07:55

Not in London and stabbing are less common here
However, a man was stabbed to death close to where I live a few weeks ago. He was a drug dealer
I have a few friends who are A&E nurses and one a Theatre nurse and according to them the people who come in with stab wounds are very very rarely innocent bystanders and will be likely to be carrying a knife themselves. I appreciate that there are some exceptions but the general feeling (round here anyway) is that the victims of stabbing could easily have been the perpetrator.
I appreciate that if your friend is vulnerable it may be harder to judge situations and not get involved (even by accident)

Cyberworrier · 10/04/2019 07:58

I live in an area where sadly there have been a lot of gang stabbings and as PP says, apart from the Edmonton ones, it is almost always young men. They aren’t all in gangs, sometimes there is mistaken identity, sometimes a young person has tried to defend another young person and ended up getting stabbed. Sometimes they are trying to stop people nicking their stuff. It is incredibly sad. On some estates/schools people are just surrounded by the threat of this horrible violence. Needless to say, in london there is poverty and lack of hope living alongside huge wealth, it’s like parallel cities.

I wouldn’t worry about your friend, as long as he won’t be hanging around with teenagers which I assume he won’t.

IntoValhalla · 10/04/2019 07:59

I live in an area with easy road and rail links to London and isn’t far from a ferry port. According to a family friend who’s a copper, an impressive amount of cocaine that is destined for London travels through my town, and in recent months, there has been an increase in stabbings/violent crime in general. My best friend is an A&E nurse, and said the other weekend a 15 year old lad was brought in with multiple stab wounds, and it turns out he was one of the drug runners Confused
There’s been no safety advices issued out to the public as far as I know!

user1457017537 · 10/04/2019 07:59

It’s a gang initiation. If you want to join the gang you have to stab someone first. Police should be doing more and when they are caught Judges should be giving severe sentences.

AwkwardPaws27 · 10/04/2019 07:59

I do. The chances of it happening randomly are extremely low.
Don't hang out with dodgy folk, don't get involved with gangs or sell drugs, take your usual precautions (don't flash cash, fancy phone etc in public) to reduce your chance of being mugged.

For your friend, I'd be more concerned about exploitation ('friends' taking his money or using his home) than the chance of stabbing.

I think of it like this: We all take risks every day crossing the road. You take all the precautions crossing the road, there's still an extremely tiny chance someone might mount the pavement and hit you - but you can't let the fear of that ruin your life.

EnthusiasmIsDisturbed · 10/04/2019 08:00

Yes I do and yes it is a worry as I have a son who is about to go off to high school

But he isn’t involved in gangs and not so likely to be in contact with gangs so that significantly makes him safer he is more likely to be a victim of phone mugging (he goes to private school and the school have become a target) which he have said to him over and over again just hand your phone over a phone can easily be replaced

It’s really worry though the school close to us has a gang and drug culture it’s just not being dealt with their isn’t enough intervention

MojoMoon · 10/04/2019 08:07

He is about 35 years too old to be mistaken for someone involved in any teen gang scene.

Random strangers are not getting stabbed on a regular basis nor is there any evidence at all that there is some kind of initiation requirement.

He sound vulnerable because he is autistic but he would be most at risk from people he thinks are his friends, not a random teen-ager in the street.
Does he have a social worker? Attend any support groups/day centres?

MojoMoon · 10/04/2019 08:11

And before anyone says what about those random stabbings in Edmonton - yes, true. But that was not a teen-ager nor connected to any kind of gang warfare or initiation. It was a man (not a teen) with severe mental health problems. Horrible but could happen anywhere where mental health services are overstretched ( Which is everywhere).

Stuckforthefourthtime · 10/04/2019 08:17

I do. The stabbings that are making the press are gang on gang violence. Tragic for those involved, but the only advice for an older man is not to get involved if he sees an altercation, and to hand over his money/phone/watch immediately if accosted.

It is terrible for the young men involved and dad for the wider area, but honestly day to day it's not as scary as you'd believe in the press. We've over here 12 years and never been robbed or threatened in any way.

PolytheneSam · 10/04/2019 08:17

Cars are far more dangerous than stabbings.

26000 people killed or seriously injured.

www.gov.uk/government/statistics/reported-road-casualties-in-great-britain-provisional-estimates-year-ending-june-2018

When you think of knife crime you need to relate it to the population living in particular area and length of time considered: how many deaths per population per year for instance.

In addition some stabbings are retributive or crime related so in total most people should not be concerned at all.

Stuckforthefourthtime · 10/04/2019 08:22

Not dad! I meant day to day...Blush

Original poster
JuniorAsparagus · 10/04/2019 08:32

The article he sent me mentions a 63 year old and a 39 year old. It is from his local paper. It is this sort of thing that worries him.
He reads the Mail Online far too much which doesn't help. He messages me daily and I try to be the voice of reason to him.

OP posts:
meowmix7 · 10/04/2019 08:46

I live in East London and there is a stabbing most evenings / definitely every weekend and yesterday right outside my house in broad daylight on the very public highstreet - BUT as a previous poster said it's almost always gang related - all basically going around stabbing each other rather than random members of the public (although random stabbings have happened - like just 2 weeks ago!)

I've stopped being worried about it - they aren't after me and it's very unlikely to happen at random for no reason !!

I wouldn't worry too much!x

InternetArgument · 10/04/2019 08:49

meowmix- Spot on.

Original poster
JuniorAsparagus · 10/04/2019 09:25

In his mind being black makes him vulnerable, which is why I mentioned it.
Thank you for all your reassuring comments.

OP posts:
Eliza9919 · 10/04/2019 09:32

Most stabbings are gang related but quite a few attacks in the last week or so have been random people.

There was a woman thrown from a block of flats in Enfield, a woman stabbed in the back in Edmonton, but she was the first the 5 that got randomly stabbed. A woman was stabbed with a machete in Kings cross, a man was stabbed outside Ilford station, there's been a few around Romford that aren't gang related. There's been more but I'm not going to list them all.

Everyone I know still in Edmonton are just staying off the streets and trying not to walk anywhere, where possible.

Stuckforthefourthtime · 10/04/2019 09:36

How bad is his specific area? Because there are areas where living alone with disabilities make him more vulnerable (though not his race), if he is in a rough estate for example I'd want to make sure that he has people pop by occasionally to check he's ok and is seen to have social connections.
Generally though, he's likely fine and the biggest risk to him is continuing to read the Mail Online...

DullPortraits · 10/04/2019 09:45

I do and every single incident was gang/ drug related bar one which apparently was due to a mental health issue but his victim was known to him. None have been random attacks x

Buster72 · 10/04/2019 09:46

@pk37
No one was murdered with a machete in South harrow. A man collapsed and died. Reports were greatly exaggerated.

Swipe left for the next trending thread