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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Awkward in laws situation

16 replies

Starlive23 · 08/04/2019 19:59

So my FIL has very kindly offered to help my DH rip out our existing bathroom. He's a recently retired plumber and we are obviously so grateful for his help!
Problem being, he said it would take 10-14 days.

5 weeks later and there is still no floor, no radiator, no sink, few tiles and gaping hole where the extractor fan is going. Plus kitchen is totally out of bounds, tiles and bags of cement etc everywhere.

MIL asked me recently if it was starting to get annoying not being able to use the kitchen (with a very inquisitive toddler!) Which I thought was light-hearted and I replied yes of course.

This has now somehow translated into me being a really ungrateful cow! I honestly never meant that for a second, I have a great relationship with my FIL and would never mean to offend.

It's really soured the relationship with MIL who says we are taking FIL away from her when they have both recently retired and she wanted to do fun things and not have him here all the time.

Have offered to take them out for a meal but was met with a very abrupt no!

OP posts:
Furrydogmum · 08/04/2019 20:11

Get a working plummer booked in and let the in laws stew - no fun being in chaos with a toddler!!

Starlive23 · 08/04/2019 20:13

Oh god why haven't the paragraphs appeared!!

Have looked for plumber, nobody can book us in asap, the best was 5 weeks!

OP posts:
Chocolateisfab · 08/04/2019 20:14

I think I know why fil wants to be at your house for hours of each day....

TheInvestigator · 08/04/2019 20:14

If you can afford it, just book a plumber and get it done. If they ask why then tell them straight that 5 weeks and the bathroom still isn't fitted is ridiculous and when you expressed a little frustration you were met with their rude and aggressive reaction. Tell them you'd rather pay someone.

IvanaPee · 08/04/2019 20:15

Is FIL still doing the work? What’s the meal for? Sorry, I don’t get this!

LordNibbler · 08/04/2019 20:15

I think you've actually been very laid back about it, I'd have lost my rag by now. I'd just get a plumber in and get it finished.

Tucobenedicto · 08/04/2019 20:17

Ask your mil how she would cope without a bathroom and kitchen for 5 weeks.. she sounds a belter that one.....

MaybeitsMaybelline · 08/04/2019 20:20

For a recently retired ex plumber he isn’t cracking on is he? Imagine paying for it and it taking that long.

I feel for you, don’t let him do anymore jobs, as generous as they may seem.

MissConductUS · 08/04/2019 20:22

He's hiding from your MIL at your house. Expect the project to take a year or more.

CoffeeConnoisseur · 08/04/2019 20:23

FIL has very kindly offered to help my DH rip out our existing bathroom

Did he actually say anything about helping him fit a new one though?Grin

Claw01 · 08/04/2019 20:40

Maybe as floor, tiles, extractor fan are not plumbing, he is expecting your dh to do it?

Onceuponacheesecake · 08/04/2019 20:42

I'd be beyond fed up. Do you know anyone else who can help? What a joke

WatershedMoment · 08/04/2019 20:44

MIL sounds awful.

Starlive23 · 08/04/2019 20:53

Have showed these replies to my DH and I have to say they have cheered us up and made us chuckle. Perhaps FIL is in hiding from MIL!!

FIL is a lovely man, one in a million but MIL has always been a sensitive one, very easily offended and tbh a bit mardy.

They are off to Spain for a week this weekend too, so that'll be another week of peeing in the dark! Ah well, the rant has made me feel a bit better. I'll have a more detailed look into getting someone in to possibly 'help' him finish the work.

OP posts:
WipeYourFeetOnTheRhythmRug · 08/04/2019 20:56

They’re off to Spain? Ask them if you can move into their house while they’re gone!

This would drive me insane. Redouble the search for a plumber!!

wizzywig · 08/04/2019 20:58

Is your fil having an affair? Or maybe a secret family?

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