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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have a box of presents?

38 replies

Breathingfire · 07/04/2019 15:53

So yesterday sil came round to pick me up and drive to a baby shower. She came early to spend a little time with my kids. I hadn't got my present wrapped up for the mum to be yet so got it organised in front of her

It was a set of story books and some sleepsuits I'd bought in a sale, £25 down to £16, a nice brand. She asked me where/when I'd bought them and I said in a Christmas sale.

I then told her how I often buy clothing presents in sales. I love boden/frugi/jojo/john Lewis and think the quality is good so when shopping for my girls I'll pick stuff up and put it in a box. Not just anything mind, only if I really like it and have an idea of who it's for. Currently there's two backs of sleepsuits, a pram suit and 3 outfits in said box. All but one outfit are spoken for.

Sil accused me of being cheap, I explained that I'd rather get nice stuff in a sale then spend the same amount on tesco sleepsuits at the same price but poorer quality.

She then said (here's where I think she was BU) that the mum to be today would think I'd spent more on her then sil had even though we spent roughly the same. I personally don't ever remember thinking about how much people spent on gifts for my girls so don't see the issue.

Sil agrees that everyone has boxes of Christmas cards, wrapping paper and £10 gifts for kids parties but that a box of clothing was cheap

Help us clear up this light herated debate, anyone else have a box?

OP posts:
Mummyjsa · 07/04/2019 15:55

I always buy gifts in the sale! Nice brands that I wouldn’t buy full price as a gift, but so the recipient get something really nice but in my budget! Smart shopping!

PurpleFlower1983 · 07/04/2019 15:56

I don’t have a box but I’m getting one! What a great idea! I’ve just had a baby and the quality difference is so clear with the brands you’ve mentioned.

Gooseygoosey12345 · 07/04/2019 15:59

She's ridiculous. It's a brilliant idea. People get higher quality items and you spend less money. I don't see the issue. I've also never once thought about how much someone had spent when they've given gifts and certainly never compared between people.

iklboo · 07/04/2019 16:00

Fabulous idea!

JustAWaferThinMint · 07/04/2019 16:01

More fool her. I thought everyone did this.

ClaraLane · 07/04/2019 16:01

No of course you’re not BU, I love having a box of presents for people. It spreads the cost and means I can buy things normally out of my price range!

BlueMerchant · 07/04/2019 16:02

She's annoyed that her gift looks 'cheap'. She wouldn't care if it was the other way around.
She's one of them judgy people who looks at gifts on her Birthday and works out how much people have spent on her.

Merryoldgoat · 07/04/2019 16:03

She’s being daft - I’m starting a box!

UrsulaPandress · 07/04/2019 16:03

I used to get kids presents from TK Max whenever I saw something appropriate. Often a lot cheaper than the rrp.

BlueMerchant · 07/04/2019 16:03

(lighthearded- of courseGrin)

Surfingtheweb · 07/04/2019 16:05

I always try to pick things up in sales way before they are needed. It's not mean it just makes financial sense. I once brought my relatives presents for a year from the Boots January sales, I was short of money & buying like that meant they all had lovely gifts.

TooManyPaws · 07/04/2019 16:06

I have a present drawer of all sorts. Nice tinned soaps etc when Arran Aromatics are having a sale, fun fridge magnets, pet toys, everything!

MonsterKidz · 07/04/2019 16:07

YANBU

I do the exact same. I always have a box with various bits for presents - I pick nice toiletries in sets when on sale, jewellery, candles etc. then use for presents for teachers/colleagues/friends/sisters etc. When my first was turning one, we got loads of duplicate presents. Two packs of the same jigsaws, books, toys. Rather than return them and change to something else (he really didn’t need any more toys) I put one set aside for birthday party presents and used the money I’d saved there to buy him new vests, sleepsuits or whatever he needed at the time. I will even pick up kids birthday presents when I see popular items on sale for future use.

DollyRose · 07/04/2019 16:14

Well I have a present wardrobe😮 I wonder what she'd think of that.

My mum had always done it and people always loved her gifts. I thought it was a fab idea. Clothes and gifts are always overpriced and even in the sale shops are making a profit. I never have to panic buy and people will always get a nice gift. 🥳

Rua13 · 07/04/2019 16:19

Sour grapes on her part.I think it's a great idea.

BikeRunSki · 07/04/2019 16:23

I’ve always done this. My dc are now 7 and 10.

Kitkatiom · 07/04/2019 16:24

Oh yes! I do this all the time. There is always something in the box for a last minute gift.
Reminded me I need to go bargain hunting as it's getting a bit low

SadieContrary · 07/04/2019 16:25

I think she's trying to be a snob, and failing massively. Good on you. Giving a lovely gift and having saved yourself money in the process. She should have patted you on the back.

ShaggyRug · 07/04/2019 16:36

Great idea. Be sure to carry this on with Primary age children’s birthday gifts. Always a good idea to have a few generic gifts in hand for a last minute party invite.

Original poster
Breathingfire · 07/04/2019 16:50

Thanks all, it was light hearted really although she may have been a bit offended when she thought I'd "look better" to the mum to be

OP posts:
KC225 · 07/04/2019 18:50

I have a present box. Usually for kids parties, I would pick up some things in the sale and have them in standby. I also have card box too - various birthday, thank you, blank and a couple of grievance cards too.

StoneofDestiny · 07/04/2019 19:03

Yes - a present cupboard!

Nanasueathome · 07/04/2019 19:08

I’ve got a present wardrobe too
Buy stuff in the sales or on special offer and bung them in the cupboard
I’m retired now but when I was at work one of the higher managers used to ask what I had and then buy from me for her friends and family

Stuckforthefourthtime · 07/04/2019 19:10

I do the same, it's useful and means I'm never gift-less when there's a party I've forgotten about, or someone close but not that.close has a baby.

Too much baby stuff though, as I am still so broody so buy for other people's tiny babies instead! Blush

Sn0tnose · 07/04/2019 19:19

I have a present box.

I suspect the 'cheap' comments were more to do with her feeling a smidge outdone in the present stakes than her genuine feelings and that she'll have her own stash before Christmas.