To expect the teacher to call me for Parent Teacher conference on time...

[eleusis]

and if not to make SOME effort to give a phone number where I could call her back when SHE missed the appointment by 23 minutes?

She very begrudgingly agreed to this phone conference when I told her I could not possible be at school at 3:34. (then appointment was later changed due to their error to 4:15). I told her I could do the time, but only on the phone. Blah blah blah, so she agreed to it.

I waited for the call, but then missed it because I was away from my desk 25 minutes later. And she left a message that said something like "Well this is really difficult over the phone because there is a report for you to comment on... well, maybe we'll catch up some other day."

Now, why couldn't she say "so sorry I'm late, if you can call me back on x I'll be here for another 15 minutes". I think her approach was a bitpassive agressive to be honest.

And Im bloody pissed off that the school thinks I can just leave work in the middle of the afternoon.

There goes my donation to the end of the year teacher pressie's. Think I'll spend it on someone more deserving... like my lovely new nanny.

3:34? Eh? Sorry, that was supposed to say 3:45.

Presumably this isn't parents evening or anything? I mean, she hasn't had other appointments which over ran?

Yes, I'm sure the others overran. That's okay, these things do overrun. But a bit of effot on the message to give me a way to contact her straight away seems reasonable. Especially since it is she not I who overran.

Mine was the last appointment. When I asked her to call me she said "These are the same times that all the other parents have agreed to come and they all work too." I laughed at her and said "all the other parents do not work". There are 26 kids in DD's class and ONE other mum works full time. She never goes to the P-T conferences because she can't make the times they offer. I'm a bit more stroppy about demanding a suitable time. Actually it has never been a problem before. As I have laways been offered an evening appointment. But, not this time.

Forgot to say....

Nope, and before school wasn't on offer anyway.

I am prepared to leave work early, but not in the middle of the day. I can make about 4:45 onward.

I'm afraid this is pretty standard in state schools - they are not terribly flexible so if what's on offer doesn't work for you there's not usually a lot you can do about it. Our school offers appointments up to 7pm so this hasn't been a problem for us but there have been numerous other inconveniences which you just learn to work around. You are not a customer and not treated like one.

Oh, MrsWobble, that was my next question. Is there a difference between state and private schools?

Cod, are your kids in private school?

I don't know if there's much practical difference but there's certainly a better "customer service" ethos at dd1's private secondary school. I think the head is conscious that he is running a business and needs to fill the places with the best children he can get whereas the primary school was heavily oversubscribed and non selective.

Strange how things change. When my Mother was a teacher the conferences were always in the evening to suit all parents.

Whe I taught the p-t conferences were 4-7.30, 8pm. I knew of a couple of parents who needed early morning apps and always managed to fit them in. I always tried to accomodate parents when it was IEP reveiw time also as one of my parents could only do 8am.
I was always in work from 7.30am so it didn't really bother me...

What I'm actually annoyed about is how she gave no avenue through which to call her back in the span of next ten minutes. It was veru oh well maybe some other day after I spent 20 minutes or so waiting at my desk for her call. Just a little bit of effort on her part.

I think she was sulking about having to call me.

I normally really like this teacher (and DD is only in nursery so I suppose it isn't the end of the world) but why can they expect parents to spend three hours leaving work early and they can't put forth an extra two minutes of offort.

20 minutes isn't really all that long to wait is it? I do sympathise as I'm in the same boat but I expect she'd been kept waiting around by other parents all afternoon and had had enough.

I must admit that our school does an evening and an afternoon for parents consultation. But as it's a nursery maybe they aren't going to be as flexible. I've never had anything like that from a nursery TBH.

I'm not annoyed that she ran over. I just think that when she called she could have said "if you can call me back on xxx in the next ten minutes I'll still be here". Seems fair when she was the one who called late. But, no, she gave me no avenue through which to contact her.

20 minutes is a long time when you've got collegues asking you to come talk to them and you've been putting them off.

"Sorry not now..."
"But, it's urgentEleusis"
"I know. Everthing is. But you have to wait."

Nope. They did not answer. I left a message. Then, I e-mail them asking if they could provide me with a direct line or e-mail for teacher. I imagine they'll laugh when they read that. I might get a response next week.

they do them for 5 onwards in my kids school (private) and on until 7 ish.

and you can make alterntive times ifneed be

I would be very happy to see a parent who couldn't make parents evening at another time. Although TBH as our parents evenings went on pretty late, if they couldn't make it I would expect to see them within my working hours outside of that.

I think it was barking of the teacher to try to arrange a telephone appointment on parents evening. Barking. They always overrun and you are always knackered at the end of it and want to get home. And maybe have to sort out your own childcare arrangements.

An appointment on a different day is a much better bet.

If the P-T conference was actually in the evening I could make sure to be there.

Oh well, next time I'm going to make a bigger stink about wanting an evening eppointment, and not suggest a phone conference. To be honest, I don't think the phone was ideal, I only suggested it because she insisted on 3:45. I'd miss half the work day if I left in time for a 3:45 appointment. I wouldn't ask her to miss half her work day to come meet with me.