AIBU to think it's impossible for me to work while I have preschoolers?

[CoraCoo]

Oh works hard in a decently paid job and I am a sahp with a 1 year old and 3 year old. We are comfortable enough day to day, however we don't have much money for unexpected emergencies, holidays, gifts for birthday parties, visiting family, car repairs, home improvements etc.

If I could work it would be really helpful to have a few extra hundred pounds per month just to dip into as and when we need. Id also love to increase what we earn so we could get a bigger mortgage to move house. Is it currently impossible for me to work? I can't see a way around the childcare issues:

Childcare costs more than I would be able to earn as I've no skills experience beyond nmw jobs. This would bring household balance down lower than it currently is, so that's no use.

Oh frequently works away for weeks at a time without much notice so I can't get a job evenings or weekends out with his working hours as we don't know when i would be free.

We have no family or friends nearby that would be willing as well as able to commit to providing childcare.

Am i unreasonable to think its hopeless and I've no hope of earning any money until they are in school? Did you find a way around similar circumstances? Am I completely missing something and there is an easy solution to this?

You get the 30 hours if you are working and being paid 16 times the NMW (I think), or more. It's a really good deal - I work 3 days a week and my childcare is almost free, which makes working very attractive.

Tell her she's welcome to come early and she can help with the food prep

Whoops sorry! Wrong thread!

Deliveroo. Gigtogig.co.uk. Taskrabbit?

Oh really Tawdry, that sounds interesting! Effectively the older one's childcare would be covered then. That could work.

(To be clear - I meant using the gig economy for evenings/weekend work when you know he is around - ie no childcare costs. That won't work if you need regular childcare.)

Unless your DH is very high earning, you can get help through Universal Credit towards childcare. I'm happy to do a calculation if you want to PM me. Alternatively try one of the online calculators. They can sometimes be out though so just be aware.

I was in the same position, once they both reached 15hrs I did a lot of volunteering to build up my cv and then managed to get a job once the youngest started school. The financial relief has been huge.

It was a really tough position and I sympathise, but you will get there. And definitely volunteer for everything you possibly can just so you can show what skills you have been using outside the home.

But evening work would still be worth it with your dh taking care of the children when he’s there, and then booking a babysitter for the occasions he can’t be? If you find a local responsible older teenager they will be glad of some extra income. And even if you just break even on the occasions you use a babysitter, you’re still making money overall. Realistically I think that’s the sensible way to look at it. Once you have children you just accept that sometimes you’ll be working ‘for nothing’ (I did for several years when we had two under-2 in nursery - ouch!) You just have to look at it overall - so long as your dh is there to look after the kids some of the time then you’re turning a profit.

Oh I forgot about the 30hrs,it came in to late for me! Definitely worth looking in to.

There is a top-up, because the 30 hours is term-time only, so spread over the year (I work all year) I pay about £180 a month for 3 days of childcare a week from 7:45am to 6pm. Really good.

And there’s no chance of your dh at least committing to being there at weekends so you can do weekend work?

You can temp and be available when dh is around - as others have said, babysitting is ideal for that, I’ve usually got a few to contact in case one isn’t available as you can’t expect constant availability for that.

Not impossible but it is tough. I work evening and over night shifts x 3 per week. It is exhausting, but the extra money each month is great.
I don't see a huge financial benefit, without it we'd be in severe trouble with outgoings, even food shortages.
If you are living modestly and managing use your time to brush up on skills, look out for free online courses.
Your DC are young, the next couple of years will fly by.

Maybe things are different now but when my DC were young enough to get the free hours there wasn't a job that I could find anywhere that fitted in with the hours of the playgroup and the school holidays. It's good for the benefit of the child but I couldn't see how it would help to get parents back to work unless they were very lucky to find work that fitted.

Oh yes, the morning nursery in term time in Scotland is ideal for kids and many of them are wonderful, but they’re very tricky for working parents - we do have a few CM at ours though, but they also do term time only as mostly mums.

Caughtinanet... but isn’t the idea that the free hours can make it easier to work, in that it subsidises some of the hours you’re working. Actually the point of free hours is about early years learning rather than child care per se, but making work more accessible is a kind of knock on?

My children were in nursery way before any free hours came along so we had to pay for everything. But presumably if your child has a session of, say, 3 hours in the morning that’s free, and you find work for 5 hours, you just pay for the extra hours? I would imagine you’re on a hiding to nothing if you expect to find a job you can get to, do, and get back from, all within the free hours window. Surely the point is that You’re still going to be better off than not working.

England and Wales offer free childcare hours for children 3 and over, may be worth looking into. Also you may be entitled to working tax credit and/or child tax credit to help with childcare costs, depending on the amount of hours you work and your husband's earnings. I'm not sure if this is all dealt with by Universal Credit now though?!

Not impossible at all. Could find a job with hours around your DH’s job I.e weekend job. Might not bring much money in but it’s something.

Alternatively find an evening course at college or study through open university so you can get a career?

I studied at uni and worked PT with three DC under the age of five. It’s perfectly doable.

I could have written that OP! I am self employed teaching hobby classes but very infrequently. If DH is away from work, if the children are ill and can’t go to nursery etc... I really can’t be arsed scrambling around to find last minute childcare, taking annual leave to look after sick kids etc. DS1 is starting school in Sept and actually think that’s going to be even more restrictive as not many jobs are term time school hours!

I don’t know if it’s perfectly doable - it depends on your energy levels, and going back to work when the dc are at school is what some at my school have done, and some of them have retrained once the dc are in school.

I'd suggest taking a longer term view and using the next few years to study or upskill so that you can command a higher wage when your children are in school and you have the time to work.

It doesn't sound like it makes financial sense to work now, but years and years out of the workforce is going to impact your long term earning potential.

if the children are ill and can’t go to nursery etc... I really can’t be arsed scrambling around to find last minute childcare, taking annual leave to look after sick kids etc. DS1 is starting school in Sept and actually think that’s going to be even more restrictive as not many jobs are term time school hours!

It is tough. My DC are school age and it doesn't suddenly become easier.

There's 14 weeks of school holidays to cover....I have no family who could help so my DC would have to go to holiday clubs for the whole time. One of my DC had sn so needs high quality care...I found an appropriate holiday club which would cost £550 per week for two children . More than I'd earn.
Plus inset days, sick days (currently have one DC home sick today), teachers strikes etc etc

And I know it’s been said countless times before on MN but do consider the long term impact of not having adequate pension provision if you’re out of the workplace or only working part time for years. The state pension is seriously shit and likely to get worse if anything. The legislation now about auto enrolment means that the vast majority of employers have to have a scheme.

I’ll be honest- as a young mum forking out the equivalent of my earnings in childcare for several years, pension was the last thing on my mind. I kept working because I had a good job and didn’t want to lose it, and also I enjoyed the stimulation. Now I’m in my 50s that pension is uppermost in my mind and I’m so glad I continued working.

acciocat - I think it is still very difficult.

First, the 28 days cover also Bank Holidays unless you get these extra. So, if you work for a company which closes over BHs you can't use these to cover school holidays.

Secondly, I doubt all employers are happy if parents take all the school holidays, you may have to swap/negotiate with colleagues. I had 4 years jiggling school holidays with 2 other colleagues, so no way I could take time off all the time. I got 2 weeks in Summer, I could have either 1 week Easter and one week half-term Feb/May/October OR 2 weeks Easter if we planned a longer holiday and then I was at the bottom for all other half terms.

Christmas is a major no-no in my sector, if I am lucky I get time off every couple of years, luckily DH's office closes over the whole period.

DH also works away a lot so if DD was off sick, had an inset day or whatever I had to take time off as well. Luckily that didn't happen too often but I always had one week spare holiday. Also there were always things at school they expected parents to attend.

For the OP - I would bite the bullet and think ahead. Maybe see if you find a job where expenses = income and you know it will get better in the future. See it as extra training/gaining experiences. On the long run it will work out. Also think of potential pension increases if you work now.

We are in the same position OP.
We are comfortable enough on DH’s wage alone - we can afford to live decently if we stay within the budget, and we have a credit card for big emergencies (like when our car broke down) that we can pay off in small chunks every month. But if I went to work at my old job (in a hotel) and then had to factor in childcare costs for both DCs (currently 2yo and 3yo, and I’m pregnant with DC3) we would actually be financially worse off because it would eat up my entire wage, plus a little from DH’s too to cover it all.
We are better off staying as a single-income household until all the DCs are in school, then I will work part time - that’s the plan anyway!!