Will my life be rubbish after 30?

[whiteteeth04]

In 6 months I’m 30.

I’m not really where I expected to be in my career due to changing direction a couple of years ago. I’ve been at junior management level for 2 years and I only earn 30k. I feel like I’m unlikely to get a promotion in my current job as the goalposts for it are always changing, so I’m stuck.

I own a house but have to have a lodger until 2021. After a string of piss takers, current guy is rude and obnoxious but if I ask him to leave it’s another failure.

My love life is such a disaster that it’s a running joke among my friends. I’m attractive and find it easy to get dates but have been on about 60 in the last couple of years and am still single. Whenever I’ve met someone I really like there is always a crazy reason that we won’t get together - they move away, they’re not over their ex etc.

Life just feels like a struggle and maybe it’s my age but I can’t see how it will ever get better or change and it’s not through lack of trying.

Can anyone offer me some reassurance that if you’re not sorted by 30, it’s not too late?

Stealth boast.

I’m 31, I also felt terrified about turning 30, it was of course a stupid thing to feel as being 30 really is no different to being 25.

Financially, you sound like you’re doing very well, I didn’t earn £30k+ until I was in my 30s and at 38, still don’t own a home (though that is mostly by choice as we need to move around a bit). I didn’t meet my dh until I was 28.

I does sound though like maybe you’ve settled for a quiet life quite soon. In my 20s, I was living in flat shares, partying, travelling, working abroad. I didn’t really quiet down til my 30s, but yes, life has only gotten better.

I worried a lot about things in my 20s and was nervous about what the future held. It’s turned out much better than I imagined. I probably should have relaxed and not worried so much.

You're not in a bad position really.
My 30's were great. Met DP (now DH) had DD. My Mum was alive. Lots of fun was had.
Rather than focus on what you don't have, enjoy what you do have and start making plans for changing the bits you don't like!

^I think appreciating what you do have rather than what you feel you don't would be better than feeling sorry for yourself - at least, that's how it comes across^

I wouldn't have put this in such an insensitive way.....not a very nice thing to say to a young girl who's going through some turmoil.

She's not a snowflake....she's a sensible young woman who is reflecting on her life and options.

Good for her, I say.

I don't know what possesses people to be unkind to young girls who are having difficulties.....to get such satisfaction from it......that's just.....weird.

Rather than being nasty, you could have directed the OP to look up the Happiness Trap.....which is a nicer and kinder way of getting the OP to consider what she has now and being grateful for it.

About to turn 35 this year and can confirm that it's all downhill from there

sandi2019 while I agree that being unkind is pointless, the OP is 29. She is not a ‘young girl’.

ODFOD

'only earn 30k' 😂

Unless you live in London, lovely, you're doing better than 2/3rds of the rest of the country.

Also at 29 you're not a "young girl", whoever said that

You're 4 years off middle age.

Read 'everything I know about love..at 30'. I am not usually into this kind of chic lit but it's funny and I actually found it very helpful and almost therapeutic. I'll be 30 soon and I'm -Now- ok with it!

Sounds like you're doing well in your career btw, don't be so hard on yourself.

What's wrong with having aspirations? I was on more than 30k at 30, and that was over 10 years ago. Cheeky fuckers these millenials wanting a decent salary .

Tbh OP my 30s were my hardest decade, young children, lost my mum. The time of my life I realised that life was hard most of the time and you have to make the most of the good bits

My story is identical to leafygreen. Wishing you a happy 30th! Xx

Everyone around here in their 20s is either a young girl or young lad.......eg....my partner described an incident tonight where a "young lad has been attacked in town".....he was 28.

Or if he wants me to book an appointment with his favourite stylist, he'll ask for ".......the young girl"......she's probs knocking on 28/29.

At 30 I moved to London on my own and was single. But I knew what job I wanted and went for it. Half the battle is knowing what you want imo. I'm now 37 and have a husband, a DD and an awesome job. My lovelife was a wreck because I didn't actually want anyone...

Must try harder

Next!

@whiteteeth04 you're doing fine. More than fine tbh. Milestone ages bring to light where we're not happy with our lives. If you're not happy, do something about it!

Kick out the lodger, get a different one - how is this a failure?? Move sideways or up out of your current organisation - promotion won't come to you, you have to go out and get it.

30s are so much better than 20s. I care way less what anyone else thinks of me - it's not conscious, it just happened. Relax and embrace this awesome decade