Aibu to not want to holiday with these friends atm?

[Hiddenaspie1973]

We've got a couple who are long term friends. We get on well. They had a child early 20s, we had mid 30s.
Their child is 20, ours is 12. We're at different stages wrt kids.
I don't want to holiday with them for May day. The man and my man get pissed. Me and the lady are friendly but not that close.i can't be all adulty, as our Dd gets lonely/bored. I feel like nanny mcphee whilst the 3 of them arrange non child friendly stuff.
I want to holiday just us 3- it forces oh to spend time with our dd.
When our child no longer holidays with us I'd love to go with them, pubbing, touring etc.
Aibu.

Not at all U. Holidays should be how you want them. Not something you don't look forward to then don't enjoy. Don't do it OP!

YANBU, I'd certainly prefer family time too. Certainly if OH got drunk with the husband I'd hate it. However, how to get out of it is the question! I'm not sure I can help there apart from saying outright you don't want to do it and being very clear with you OH.

Does your child enjoy the holidays? If not would she enjoy a weekend away with his grandparents so you could have an adult weekend, and then obviously a family holiday a bit later in the year?

When I was that age my parents used to go away every Easter bank holiday and I went to stay with my cousins or away with my grandparents and it was much more fun than sitting around a pub with my mum and dads friends

Yanbu. I’d hate to go on holiday with them, from your description; not because they sound bad, but just because of what you say it will end up like - your OH and the man getting shitfaced while you make small talk and entertain your dc alone. No thanks. That’s not a holiday.

Why do you say it “forces” your OH to spend time with your dc? That’s a bit sad .

I want to holiday just us 3- it forces oh to spend time with our dd.

Oh Hidden that is a really sad sentence. What is life generally like when it is just the 3 of you, is he an interested dad?

We can't send her to grandparents and we are nc with cousins (who are under 5 anyway, she's 12).
I wish we could. G.parents 1 live so far we'd need a holiday to recover from the drive there.then in reverse after.
Gparents 2. Lovely, v.elderly but as narc.sil
Has moved back in with them (40+) i won't let her stay there.
Oh is selfish and hasn't been that involved in child rearing. Any excuse for adult distraction and he's all over it. So the weight is on me. Luckily, i love spending time with dd. But when they're around i feel pulled.