To want a job I can go home and forget about?

[twosoups1972]

A bit of background - I am in my mid 40s with 3 dc aged 17, 16 and 12. I am well educated to degree level and worked in insurance before having dc. I didn't really enjoy it and always planned to stay at home when my dc were small. Dh is well paid and so I spent 15 years at home with my dc which I loved doing. I've never been terribly ambitious career-wise.

About 5 or 6 years ago I started to think about retraining to do something new as youngest dd was settled into school. I took a 2 year course to qualify in a fairly unusual job. I don't want to say what it is as it's quite unusual but it comes under specialist teaching. I had to pay for the course but I thought I would get that back when I started working.

Qualified a few years ago and am now in my third year working in the field. Very part time - just one day/week. I do enjoy some aspects of it but I find the professional responsibility overwhelming. I hardly ever stick to my one day per week as I have to make appointments to see children, liaise with schools/parents, write reports and so on. I have a great manager who says I should only be working on my working day but it's difficult. For example, if I send out an email suggesting some appointment times and people don't respond on my working day, I can't just leave it till the following week. So my work computer is usually on most of the week.

I work Wednesdays and by Monday I am already planning my workload and worrying about what needs to be done.

Sometimes I want to pack it all in and get a job that I can leave and go home and not worry about. But it would be a waste of that training wouldn't it?

By the sounds of it, doing that specific job just one day a week isn't practical. It's hard on you in terms of stress, your work will be affected as you struggle to reply to emails etc, and you're not giving yourself the right circumstances to do your job. Moving to 3 or even just 2 days a week would be helpful

With retail, yes you're right in that work is left at work. However it's not that flexible. It's extremely rare nowadays to get anything except a Flexi contract. That means you're given say 10hrs a week and whatever random shifts they can offer. You're meant to be flexible so say no too many times and they let you go. So that's not really an option.

Maybe look into admin work?

This isn't a job that works as one day a week at the moment. You need to discuss how it could work better with your manager, eg can school secretary book appointments, is it acceptable to only offer appointments on one day per week.

Does the job actually require more - or different hours?

It sounds stressful so I would definitely try to change the current situation.

Thank you all, some really helpful advice.

I think part of the reason I refused to do 2 days initially, was I sort of knew the job would spill over and I was worried that if I committed to 2 days, I would end up working most of the week!

I don't think it would work to do mornings only or shorter days; some children need after school appointments or when it's dark on winter afternoons, that's the nature of the job.

I am expected to do 3 appointments each day and what with travelling time, that can take most of the day. I get reports done when I can. However my manager says I should allow myself time for doing reports/other admin so sometimes I take a half day here or there to do that.

My worry is that if I do a second day, that would mean 6 appointments per week and even more reports to do.

I also need to check if it's even possible at this stage to do a second day. I know there was initially money in the budget for it but whether it is still available now I don't know.

The problem is with the management of the job. From what you say, the expectations are too great to be managed in one day.

So either you accepted the post believing it was manageable, or your manager has false expectations.

Did you have a probation period? Do you know how your predecessor managed?

Clearly it's not possible to do 3 appointments as well as the reports in one day. It sounds like you have been poorly managed.

rightsofwomen I don't think it's that, as I've said, my manager is fair and reasonable, always asks me how things are and doesn't expect reports to be done in addition to 3 appointments.

Emailing clearly isn't working if you only work one day per week, though if all you're waiting for is an email reply I can't see how that would take long if you checked once a day. Would it be possible to phone people instead?

hollow yes sometimes I do phone, still not always possible to get an instant answer, sometimes I have to leave a message to call back etc.

What does help I find though (if I'm organised enough) is to put in say 3 or 4 appointments at the same time. So I'm booking my diary well in advance.

but you can't do the job in one day. [shrug]

Can you take on an extra half day or a couple/few hours on another day but for reports etc only

That means your day you currently do is for your appointments and the other half/hours allotted are paperwork and diary setting for the next appointments.

If your manager knows it's not possible to do your reports on top of your appointments then your manager knows your role does not fit into one day!

ginky yes that's true which is why she says I should allow for reports/admin time by arranging fewer appointments when needed or allowing a half day (as part of my working day).

As in you're opening post (last paragraph) sorry I've not learnt to cut and paste on here. You say you feel like packing it all in but feel it would be a waste of training - it's not a waste. If that's what's stopping you, perhaps try to see it all, the training and the job as progression and life's experiences. You are at an age where you can still do a bit of experimenting. You could pack it in and not go straight from one job to another, and see how things unfold.

I agree with a pp about ft and pt I am full time and all the part timers find it difficult and get stressed and struggle, I never do and I never take work home and barely think about it. We work with vulnerable people so hard to forget too. I know full time is not an option for you but one day a week is crazy!
I do however have contact with a lot of people who only work 2 or 2 n half days and they have a disclosure on their email to specify it won’t be picked up until Wednesday for example, is this an option?

Are you writing reports in your free time? You say your manager encourages you to block off work time to write reports. Please do this without exception.

I try to be accommodating and flexible.

Please don't be flexible into your free time, at the expense of your own wellbeing. Yes it would be nice if someone was employed full time, early mornings, evenings so the families can have flexibility, but the school doesn't provide that.

I think it would be a shame to move from a specialist job you spent two years training for to a retail job which will bring different problems, because you have difficulties with booking appointments and you don't want to be "inflexible" (in speech marks because it's not inflexible to want to only work your working hours).

I think the options for the appointments system are

• book several in advance as you are doing, so minimising the emailing/ phoning
• arrange someone to book your appointments for you
• arrange an online booking system (some NHS has this)
• accept that booking appointments will be a bit of a pain, phone/ email people when you arrive first thing and say "please respond to me today if possible, if not I will pick up your message next week"
• designate 30 minutes once a week to respond to emails - and log off at the end of this time! I did this for a while and I always did it before I needed to collect kids so I couldn't overrun

Oh the other option is to work 2 days but build in regular report writing time so you aren't doing reports ad hoc. So rather than 6 appointments a week you might offer four with two blocked every week for report writing for example.

There are various things you can do if you enjoy the job and want to continue

Rather than a work computer, could you have a work phone? Ask people to text or phone to confirm appointments rather than email you back.

You could also consider short days - for instance I work my hours over 4-6 days (I'm currently very flexible), when I could easily do them in 3. But short days provide me and my clients with more scope re appointments - and you can do different hours on different days to allow for suitable appointment times - but still only doing 3 appointments altogether.

But I suspect you don't enjoy it that much and that is why it preys on your mind. In that case, yes, don't worry about the 'wasted training', just pack it in.

You could also negotiate fewer than 3 appts as part of an extra day. If you don’t ask, it won’t happen. What would be ok and leave you time to do the other things, 1 or 2 appts on the second day?

They may prefer to negotiate rather than lose you altogether if you make it clear that you are thinking of giving up on it. You won’t know unless you ask. Work out what would work for you though to get paid for the work you are doing and doing it all at work before you talk to your mgr.

I work 12 hours a week but I accept that I have to keep an eye on email when I'm not actually in the office, perhaps attend odd things and be generally flexible. Luckily my employers are flexible in return, providing the hours are done and the work is finished, they don't really care when / where / how I do it.