Not to like the author of The Salt Path

[Romax]

I had been so looking forward to starting this audio book. Ticked every box.

I’m 90 minutes in and I have not all warmed to the author.

She lost her home and then finds out her husband has a terminal illness. My heart went out to her struggles But....

She seems deeply judgmental and actually, for want of another word, bitchy.

I feel like I could well be the only person on the planet who reads / listens to the book and feels this way.

But on the off chance I’m not alone....?

And I didn’t get what the op is going on about either.

Well, don’t you see, the author made mistakes in quite a lot of ways. the OP wouldn’t do that, no sir.

Are we not allowed to criticise writers anymore then? Fuck that.
I haven't read it, though it was on my list.
I recently read one (another true memoir) that I thought would be good- girl in the 1940s gets sent to live with a family in Spain as a kind of companion to rich children- she was AWFUL, whined and moaned for 200 pages. Deeply unpleasant person.

I really really liked this book. There was a sense it could happen to anyone- and that the author was not some hippy dippy It All Happens For the Best type but someone suffering genuine adversity.

Ironically what shocked me about the book- even though I have been there myself- is how mean and nasty people were to poor people. Forever hurrying them on or charging for water. And now we have this thread!
I would challenge anyone in the depths of utter adversity NOT to be judgey or bitchy. Except on MN, of course.... [hmm}

Are we not allowed to criticise writers anymore then?

Criticising a writer would be saying that you though the middle sagged a bit, or that there were a few too many descriptions of sunsets or blisters. (Or that the Simon Armitage mystery went on a bit longer than was amusing, which I thought.) This is picking apart someone's personality under stress.

It’s the pure contempt she seems to have for the massive majority of people.

Look at an average day of Mn AIBU threads about dismissive/unpleasant behaviour among the Great British Public -- someone hitting a child, not controlling their dog, being verbally aggressive in a café, jumping a queue, failing to offer help when it was needed, failing to respect personal space, being insulting etc etc etc.

Now imagine dealing with that when you're already vulnerable, reeling from the shock of a terminal diagnosis for your husband, suddenly going from being a farmer with land and animals and a business and a house you've rebuilt from scratch over decades to being suddenly virtually penniless and homeless, in pain from lugging a rucksack along a steep path every day -- and you don't have anywhere safe that's yours to retreat to from other people's behaviour, apart from a tent that a man and his dog deliberately urinate on, knowing there are people asleep inside, on one occasion.

I think you'd feel as if you'd had all your skin stripped off, and at the mercy of other people's behaviour, good and bad.

And there are some accounts of very generous behaviour from people, and people who are just nice, as well as the awful ones. There's the pink-haired girl who gives them free pasties, and the nice young backpacker guys they meet near the beginning, and the soldiers on manoeuvres, and the wine millionaire who invites them in for dinner and lets them sleep in his garden, and the group of surfers on the hippie campsite who give them beer.

And they are both kind to people, too -- Moth shakes hands with the barrister who has just won the case against them in which they lose their home, and, despite living hand to mouth themselves, they give half their rations to a homeless man in need (who tells them to fuck off).

I don't agree with op at all, and it was a lovely paean to cornwall

They made themselves homeless as they didn't want to get council accommodation, btw

There's a passage right at the beginning when they consider this, as they can't get a private rental, because they've had their house repossessed and their credit rating is suddenly poor.

They go to the council to ask to go on the waiting list, and are told they are 'low priority' because Moth apparently doesn't look as if he's going to die within a year, and the only council accommodation actually currently available is a room in a B and B mostly used as a halfway house by people with drug and alcohol problems, with no idea of how long it would be for.

They didn't have to be homeless and fuck up the kids lives, there were options they were to selfish to take

In what way would taking a room in a B and B (whether or not it was full of addicts) have helped their young adult children who are away at university?

No, Aquiline- what you describe is criticising the writing. Which is completely different.

This couple clearly have many fans- I only heard about their story through the 50 book thread, and put it on my to-read list. So I read reviews and opinions about it- so I opened this thread. I shall probably still read it and form my own opinion about the writer, as the OP has done.

If a writer chooses to put their writing out there, then they choose to accept that not all criticisms are going to be positive. The OP has every right to say she thought the woman was unpleasant. Others have the right to reply. That's all.

And losing your home, receiving a terminal diagnosis or any other hardship doesn't elevate someone from being a bit of a twat to being a saint. (I repeat that I don't know if the woman in question is either- jury seems to be out) Bad things happen to good people. Bad things happen to twats. T'is the way of the world.

And losing your home, receiving a terminal diagnosis or any other hardship doesn't elevate someone from being a bit of a twat to being a saint

Apart from on here.......

But the author is constructing herself as a character through her writing.

She could have depicted herself as gushingly grateful for every contact with people that happened on the path she could have left out the fact that a dogwalker pissed on their tent, or that a woman berated her for being 'disgusting' and homeless when she was trying to fish one of their last coins out of a grate very early on and it would have been an entirely different book.

But presumably she thinks one of the insights from the walk was that homelessness and obvious poverty makes some members of the public actually cruel or at least uncomfortable; she and Moth also learn almost immediately, when perfectly nice people they meet ask how come they can take so much time out from work/life to walk the entire path, not to say 'We're homeless, so we've got all the time in the world' because it makes everyone shut down immediately.

I don't think there's anything to indicate she's in any way 'a bit of a twat', any more than most of us, she's just chosen to write a book that doesn't censor the fact that often people respond differently to you when you're suddenly visibly poor, homeless and ill.

And I think you probably have to take into account that this couple lived quite solitary lives with their children on their farm, for most of their adult lives --suddenly they're thrust into close proximity to holidaymakers they can't get away from. It's probably a shock to the system.

Nah, it says in the book they couldn't face getting council accommodation in the same village as their house...also it's fairly easy to get sheltered housing if ill or over 55- I know various people who have done it no problems.

It was their responsibility - they chose to put money into a dodgy business venture, then not file court stuff, so losing their house etc then they chose to set off on the trip etc. It was all a result of choices. Not the illness, I know, that was unfortunate but there was a lot which was a choice.

You mean they made mistakes.

Loving the way terminal illness is just unfortunate.

I put it on my "to read" list after reading the guardian article. It looks interesting, and I'm not.the sort of.person that needs to like people, so I doubt that will put me off. I find it fascinating how people react to those they think have money, those that are doing about as well as themselves, and those they perceive as poor. I often mooch around looking fairly penniless- it's an eye-opener, I tell ya!

DH (who goes full-hobo when his beard is long) had been told to "fuck off back to [your] own country" before now... when he replied in a cut-glass accent with "sorry, what?" they apologised profusely and shuffled off
Prejudice about money is some of the strongest there is.

I found her really annoying particularly her attitude to "stealing" whether it be the chocolate bars whilst waiting for the Rock Ferry or using a campsite and their facilities and then leaving without paying.

I'm maybe biased as my parents were like this and it's been a nightmare to be honest, they got sheltered accommodation in the end but it was a worry, mine also used to try and borrow money off me (like the author does with her kids) and it was hard as a student.

Nah, it says in the book they couldn't face getting council accommodation in the same village as their house...also it's fairly easy to get sheltered housing if ill or over 55- I know various people who have done it no problems.

Home, I've got the book in front of me.

On p 21:

In an ideal world we'd have found a place to rent, but it was quickly apparent that when you've had your house repossessed, it's close to impossible to get a rental property. Our credit rating was on the floor. The council would put us on their waiting list if we chose that, but we were low priority and the only accommodation they could offer at the moment was a room in a bed and breakfast that housed mainly those with drug and alcohol problems. A girl with dark hair pulled back into a tight ponytail sat behind a desk in the council offices, speaking to us in a strong Welsh accent: 'Well, if you're not going to die soon, like in the next year, then you're not that ill, are you, so I can't call you a priority, can I?' That was the moment when we knew it for certain: we'd rather be in the tent.'

OK, I see I think it may also me an age issue as read they are under 55, 50 perhaps? as my relatives were over 55.

If you have what they record as a severe illness / disability you are housed more quickly (like my friend under 55 who was recently with MS) or over 55, sheltered housing and there is also a family connection which means you get priority in the place your children live. Which is what I have seen used. They must have not fitted those categories then. there was a bit in the book about them not wanting to take it in the village though, as well as I remember that.

It also says they would rather not take it, and could have argues more for the illness. They also had a ling time during the court case etc to try to have made arrangements also. Things are never that simple.

Also they were offered a place in a B & B until something else came up, they were not offered nothing.

Well I really like judgemental people (who wants nicey nice all the time?) so I quite fancy this now

I thought the story of what they did was more interesting than who's to blame!

I didn't warm to her either, I don't know why.
But I thought the book was interesting. The way they were treated when people found out they had no money was an eye opener.

I think I found it a bit hard to believe that he was so ill but they managed all that walk. Which I guess is the whole point of the book really, that you can do more than you realise when you have no choice

I don't think anyone's ever suggested they were offered nothing by the council. What some previous posters have said, nastily, is that they were being selfish for not taking the B and B room:

They didn't have to be homeless and fuck up the kids lives, there were options they were to selfish to take. Had they made decisions like adult parents rather than petulant children i expect it would of been better for them and the poor kids but she sought of got a book out of it

What I'm saying is that I fail to see how accepting a room in a council B and B would have been in any way beneficial to their children, who are away at university.

And is anyone really suggesting that the author chose to become homeless in order to drag her seriously ill husband off on a 600 mile walk on £48 pounds a week so she could write a book about it two years afterwards?

God, the Victorian Poor Law distinction between the 'feckless' and 'deserving' poor is alive and well on Mn in 2019.

It's just really stressful if you are off at uni and you have to deal with bailing out your parents etc and not know if they have a home etc.

I know this first hand, mine made a silly decision and lost their home which came with their job so we all lost our home, I ended up having to take another year at uni partly due to it all, it was a nightmare. So, that;s my perspective on it. I felt that in particular, the daughter was struggling with it also, and didn't like the bit where they were talking about her being like the parent, and not bothering to keep the phone on, as that's the kind of stuff mine would do as well. Especially when the dad was so ill.