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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To leave 10 year old at home alone?

54 replies

naturistmum · 29/03/2019 07:30

My DS 10 (nearly 11) is unwell today and I have to deliver some training this morning. I cancelled last Friday cos my DD was ill. I cant do it again without looking unprofessional and potentially losing repeat business. My husband has to work today too (self employed professional).

My DS has a cold which has given him a bad headache today. It is unlike him to be ill (constitution of an ox usually) so I know he is genuinely unwell. He is a sensible kid and will probably just sleep or play on his tablet.

AIBU to leave him alone for up to 5 hours ….. I am aren't I? I have no friends or family that can look after him today so I'm stuck. He could come with me and stay in the car (in the clients car park so close to hand if he really needs me). Then he'd only be on his own for a couple of hours and I'd be close.

OP posts:
MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 29/03/2019 07:32

Yes you are I’m afraid, I wouldn’t leave mine and he is quite a sensible chap, especially if he wasn’t well.

Zooop · 29/03/2019 07:32

Could you do a call out on the class WhatsApp and see if any parent isn’t working today and could pop in and sit with him for an hour and be on call if he needs anything?

SuperLoudPoppingAction · 29/03/2019 07:33

Depends on the child

He would probably be better off at home rather than in a car though.

Would he message you now and again to say he's ok?

Lollypop701 · 29/03/2019 07:34

I’d take him with you. More because you will be over a hours drive away, which is a bit far. Or would dh be closer to home? If dh is close by, can nip home in lunch etc then I’d possibly leave him home.

MissEliza · 29/03/2019 07:34

You can't leave a child that age alone for so long when they're unwell.

Teateaandmoretea · 29/03/2019 07:35

I think 5 hours is too long for a 10 year old, particularly assumimg Y5 rather than 6. I leave my y5 dd (to go for a jog round the block/ to do school run/ to pop to the supermsrket) but not for that length of time when I'd be a distance away

Tillyop · 29/03/2019 07:35

I would.

Inliverpool1 · 29/03/2019 07:36

You can’t leave him in a car for a couple of hours either. You’ll have to phone in sick. End of

Butterymuffin · 29/03/2019 07:36

Your husband is going to have to cancel today. You did this last week, it's his turn now.

DocusDiplo · 29/03/2019 07:37

I would if my kid had a phone and the kid was happy.. tho I would ask a friend

GeriGremlin · 29/03/2019 07:38

Take him with you but don't leave him in the car. The car is not a safe place at all. He can sit at the side of the room or in a neighbouring room/space and be quiet for a few hours with a table or book can't he?

5 hours is too long. I think 1-2 would be ok at his age but 5 hours is just too long.

Hope it goes well

yikesanotherbooboo · 29/03/2019 07:38

I would take him with me dosed up with paracetamol , books and tablet. No question at all . Get there early and find a quiet corner.

Hellywelly10 · 29/03/2019 07:38

Depends on the child. But please dont leave him in the car for five hours. How bad is the cold, id be tempted to send him to school!

Teateaandmoretea · 29/03/2019 07:40

Your husband is going to have to cancel today. You did this last week, it's his turn now.

I agree with this ^^.

NutElla5x · 29/03/2019 07:40

I'd be more inclined to bring him with me and leave him in the car with a pillow,blanket,drinks and his tablet. and then just check on him as much as possible.

Bunnybaubles · 29/03/2019 07:40

It's entirely your decision, you know whether he would be ok on his own. I sometimes left my DS on his own at that age while I went to work. I didn't have much choice, I was a single working parent and could barely cover Bill's, let alone child care. Luckily my DS loved the responsibility, and having the TV all to himself. I phoned him regularly and had strict rules in place and he was absolutely fine. Hes 20 now and very mature for his age.
Obviously not all 10 year olds can cope on their own which is why the government leave it entirely up to you to decide as you know your child best.

Puddlet · 29/03/2019 07:40

I probably would. It depends whether he's used to being alone. I would leave a packed lunch and check in regularly. Really not ideal though.

NutElla5x · 29/03/2019 07:43

Hellywelly he'd be in the car for a couple of hours,5 if OP left him at home

EvaHarknessRose · 29/03/2019 07:44

DHs turn today.

SPARKLYSTARSHINESBRIGHT · 29/03/2019 07:46

I would but only if their was a neighbour he could knock the door if there was an emergency like fire, cut himself etc. You never know what could happen, unlikely, but it could. I left my DD for an hour last week, our dog had a seizure whilst I was away, typical. When i was that age and my mom popped to the shop my brother ran to the front door, tripped, put his head through the glass, he was OK, but again, bloomin typical.

EatDessertFirst · 29/03/2019 07:46

I agree with PP, its your DHs turn to look after a sick child today.

I would leave my DD for a maximum of a couple of hours in this situation, but not potentially 5 hours.

Rubberduckies · 29/03/2019 07:47

I think I'd leave him if I was reasonably confident he would call or go to a neighbour's if he needed help. Would he send regular messages/answer the phone? Can he get himself drinks/snacks? He's got a cold and a headache, so not life threatening.

Hyacintharehighersincelasttime · 29/03/2019 07:48

Just cancel your training op,

lazymare · 29/03/2019 07:50

I probably could, because we live somewhere that they know lots of people are around if there is a problem. However, it's probably better to either dose him up and send him to school or take him with you.

Dramatical · 29/03/2019 07:51

Someone has to look after your sick 10 year old. You can't leave them at home or in the car.