For thinking this is a bit off? - Letting yourself into a house where you no longer live!

[Mugginss]

Have NC just for this post. Not sure if I'm being OTT or if this is a bit off.

Would you do this or do you think it's normal? My partners ex let herself into the house knowing we were out. She's not lived there for 2 years although it's still technically their house. The agreement was to drop a few items at the doorstep knowing we were only a few minutes away.

Maybe bit of back story but she's not very nice to my partner, they are not on good terms so why would she feel so confident walking in like that? Is this a control thing? They are in the process of splitting assets. She's also previously told him she still loves him and misses them, yet I'm the one accused constantly of being up to no good. I'm wondering if there is more to this than he's letting on which is why he's so paranoid. She was waiting outside the house too when we got back so he spoke to her but I went on into the house.

Thoughts please?

Did see actually know you were out? Or you think she would only go in if she thought you were out?

Maybe he'd said you were out and she could go in and collect something?

OP you should check on house access, a friend is divorcing and is not allowed into the formerly-shared house without prior permission. It's not an automatic right, your partner should check this with their lawyer. If you're in the UK that is...

Check the curtains for prawns!

You are the collateral damage in their cross fire. Both of them have boundaries that are utterly fucked and he (well both tbh) doesnt sound like he is in any way ready to have moved on.

I would be moving out asap and leaving them to their fucked up I love you/I hate you/I dont want you/I dont want anyone else to have you dynamic.

Why shouldn't she? It's her house too.

For the same reason a landlord doesnt just stroll into a house they own that is lived in by someone else.

Just because she can legally, doesnt mean that she should. This is territory marking, nothing else.

Not sure why people assume I live with him. We don't live together. I have my own house. We just happened to be spending the day together. Luckily I have no toothbrush there!

I was with him when she called about 20 minutes beforehand and the agreement was to leave things on the doorstep as she either didn't want to knock on the door and meet me or wait for us to get there and bump into me. If she was that worried why go into the house not knowing for definite if we were back or not. Just makes no sense.

Apparently he can't believe she went into the house. He didn't even know she carried the house keys on her.