children that are firghtened of dogs and how i find some parents are encouraging their fear

[haychee]

I have 2 medium to large dogs and i get so cross when i come accross children that just lose the plot if the dogs go near them. I can understand that they are frightened and i call the dogs away from the child instantly. But what makes me cross is the parents responses, "that dog should be on a lead" or i just get looks that could kill you dead. My arguement is, that if the child is that frightened then why would you take him or her to a place where dogs are everywhere in a dog walking area. Why do parents encourage their childrens fear by making these comments? what good does it do for the child? I actually saw one mother once who picked her child up every time the dog was anywhere close (like 4-5meters away). The child got increasingly anxious and the mother ended up having a go at me. I know and fully appreciate that some dogs are dangerous but mine arent and i think that when parents react like this infront of their children the message they are displaying is that its ok to be this frightened of dogs.

My daughter was once frightened of thunder so i purposely sat up with her watching a storm and saying things like "wow, that one was very loud" and " cor, look at that lightening isnt it beautiful". Because of this time i spent with her and the way we watched it together has dulled her fear - infact she gets quite excited if there is a storm brewing now.
Any one else feel the same or can understand where im coming from? or maybe your one of these types of parents that react like this? I would like to discuss the issue if anyone has any comments?

Oh I don't hate dogs I hate irresponsible dog-owners

Our dog is always walked on a lead, because I know that he will get excited to see people (after initial caution), and jump up at them.
I get really pissed off with people who let their dogs run free, poo wherever they like (often does not get picked up as the owner can't always see what the dog has done, or doesn't care), and come and hassle my dog. DD, dog and I have more than once been scared of big dogs coming near us hassling our dog. It was so bad once (other big dogs attacked our dog) that I became scared of walking the dog (dd was very scared too). The owners passed us on the their bikes completely ignoring me and their own dogs.
However I also know several dog owners in the park whose dogs are extremely well behaved and reliable and can be let to walk freely alongside their owners, but that is rare.
I think it would be a good thing for parents to get their children used to dogs, it's a shame such thread always bring hysterical responses from both sides.
Bet you my post is magnificently ignored!

I am roaring with laughter at this OP.

So it's OK for your children to be scared of adults, because you've taught them they are all potential molesters, but not of bloody great dogs with teeth?

Hilarious!

thanks for understanding my point of view

dogs can also be taught to poo straight after they have eaten, therefore there is no need at all for them to do it in public spaces

if they do pick it up its vile

and a dog should never come before a childs well being I agree

FP - good post.

FillydoraTonks
The reason you should is that there are places specifically designated for kids to run about freely without the fear of a dog approaching them. Why on earth would you take a chilod that is scared into a place that has so many dogs running off leads, why not take kids to a different park where dogs have to be on a lead at all times?

The vicous circle begins when the child runs and screams in fear. I immediately recall the dogs and either take them away or put them on a lead. That is exactly why i continue to keep up the training so i am assurred that they will respond to me when in a difficult situation such as this. Dont forget my dogs live with kids who are constantly making them chase and the girls squeal. That is why when a child runs and screams in fear that they think its the same game played by my children

I do think that some parents unnecessarily project their fear of dogs on to their children.

I have a guide dog. two actually - one retired and one current. Was out with current dog picking up ds from preschool and a child approached us. not to talk to the dog I don't think - she was just walking past. Suddenly heard frantic screaming from the parent "aaaaaah come away from that dog! come away! come away now!". wtf. the dog was in harnass, on a lead, fully restrained.

And in our local tesco there is an assistant who won't help me because he's afraid of my dog - he always asks someone else to do it.

Now I totally understand fear of dogs off leads, dogs that bound up, especially to small children. And I understand people not liking dogs, but this dog is well trained and is always restrained when with me.

your dog is bitten by children thats unacceptable in any situation so is having there tails pulle being ridden on children have to be taught respect for animals too

I do think that the onus is on the dog owners to make the dog ok in public.

not on the public to have to treat them with caution and so forth.

owning a dog really is a privilege, not a right.

VICIOUS

So if you know your dogs will chase them, why not just use a lead?

You are magnificently selfish.

Thanks LittleLupin

I agree it must be frustrating for responsible dog owners who have spent hours training their dogs to be categorised the same as someone who has spoilt their dog and shows no consideration for the fact others are scare of its unpredictablility. The trouble is that when you see a dog in the park you don't know which one of these it is.

I am very happy to encourage my ds to be friendly and play with dogs that I know are well trained and gentle. However if I don't know this about a dog I am not going to take the risk with my ds, nor am I going to belittle him and not comfort him if he's frightened - thats hardly going to encourage him is it? Plus I am happy for him to be nervous of big dogs that he doesn't know as I think this is healthy.

SO I think you are being unreasonable.

The reason you should is that there are places specifically designated for kids to run about freely without the fear of a dog approaching them. Why on earth would you take a chilod that is scared into a place that has so many dogs running off leads, why not take kids to a different park where dogs have to be on a lead at all times?

I do understand your point here.

"Why on earth would you take a chilod that is scared into a place that has so many dogs running off leads"

BECAUSE ITS A FECKING PARK AND THE CHILD HAS A RIGHT TO BE THERE

and, imo, your dog doesn't. Its just an animal.

And if you can't train it not to chase children, and you are unwilling to put it on a lead, then you need to give it to someone who can, or have it put down. You don't have a right to take a dangerous, inadequately trained animal into a public place any more than I can take a bear into my local playground.

this is ridiculous
we have a huge park round the corner, with play area (with obscene graffiti all over it), and lots of fields for children to enjoy.
So local children should be obliged to get in the car and go to another park, instead of their local one, because of off lead dogs?
Why is it so difficult to be considerate of other people?

And WHERE are these fabuous parks where dogs have to be on a lead?

none round here, aside from the few tiny kids playgrounds.

Who are more important - children or dogs? There is only one right answer here, and if you don't get it, frankly you are being far worse than unreasonable.

the more i think on this the more I am

so your viscous dogs should have the whole PARK to gallop around in, while the kids are banished to a tiny fenced in area?

how on EARTH does that make sense?

god i am sorry for the responsible owners on here. haychee is giving them SUCH a bad name.

I have two very well trained, small to medium dogs, who only come off their leads in the dog walking areas that we have in and around the town where I live. These are there for dog walking in particular and this fact is well posted, so if people who do not like dogs are there, then they have no reason to complain at me if my dogs are off their leads.

I agree with the OP that fear of dogs in children can be made worse by the parents reaction. I think that in the majority of cases fear is learned, not in all cases. There are people who are genuinly frightened of dogs, big or small, usually because of a nasty run in with an untrained and unsupervised dog.

Not all dog owners are irrisponsbile (sp?), and alot like myself and my DH respect public spaces.

I love dogs and always have, but I myself can be quite worried upon seeing a large dog, off a lead and usually the owner is nowhere in sight. That is IRRISPONSIBLE.

most parks i know have swings, slides, and climbing frames in them.

i'm pretty sure that they are there for children to use, not dogs

hear hear

but really, don't you get that people come before your dogs?

I completely agree that anyone going into a designated, fenced off, dog walking area can expect dogs.

the problem comes when most of most parks is a dog walking area and kids can only play safely in a tiny part of it.

Its also a shame becuase kids like running around in the grass etc, and typically, playgrounds are a bit more structured. So to just have playgrounds for kids isn't sufficent imo.

Take your dogs to a field Haychee.

Perhaps the 'responsible' owners and 'well-behaved' dogs should wear a special bright jacket or collar so that we know we can trust them near our children.
The problem is not all dog-owners and dogs can be trusted to behave nicely so the best tactic is avoidance rather than being attacked/bounced on/shouted at or subjected to piles of poo on the footpath.

I've only read the OP, so this has no doubt already been said (many times!).

I always try to keep DD away from any strange dogs, and will pick her up if a dog comes near her. The reasons for this are

a) I have seen two nasty and unprovoked dog attacks (one on my two year old brother who was nearly blinded, and the other on my DH). I am NOT going to put my DCs at risk.

b) DD loves dogs. She's not at all cautious with them, and will quite happily pat a strange dog if it comes up to her. She's only 2, and can be a bit 'squealy' and over-excited about it. I feel that her behaviour is too unpredictable for safe interaction with a dog.

c) I do have friends with dogs. I will let DD learn how to play safely with a dog if I know it has a very very gentle temperament. I'm not going to take some random stranger's word for it that 'Oh he's very gentle'. (Funnily enough that's what the owners of the two attacking dogs said ).

And where is this mythical place where there are no dogs being walked? Believe me, I would be there in a shot if it existed.