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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to only give £10?

17 replies

DumbleDork · 25/03/2019 17:02

Im going to a wedding in about 6 weeks. Im really broke as I lost my job recently and my redundancy pay is coming to an end so have no disposable income atm. Is it really stingy to only give £10 as a gift for a wedding where I’m only invited as an evening guest?

OP posts:

donajimena · 25/03/2019 17:04

Not at all. I'd give 50 if a day guest, my partner and I gave a tenner each at an evening do so that sounds about right.

Lost5stone · 25/03/2019 17:04

No problem just give what you can

Dueinnov19 · 25/03/2019 17:05

Not at all. You should only give what you can afford. I would hope you have been invited to celebrate the start of their married life and not because you brought a gift

DeadCertain · 25/03/2019 17:05

To me not at all. Some of our guests didn't give us a gift at all and I didn't care one bit; what was important was that they came and shared our day and had a great time. Going to weddings can be pretty expensive anyway for guests so I just appreciated the effort that everyone had made to be there with us, money wouldn't matter one jot - especially if I knew someone had lost their job.

Original poster

DumbleDork · 25/03/2019 17:08

Thank you. I was really worried I’d be judged for it

OP posts:

Mummyto2munchkins · 25/03/2019 17:10

We'd brought a really nice set of coasters once, think it was around £10-£15. DP is a carer and only I work. The couple didn't mind at all and absolutely love the coasters! Was wooden ones in the shape of a heart with a pattern cut out, in a little holder.

Bhappy12 · 25/03/2019 17:14

Not at all. I'm getting married in a couple of months and honestly don't care if we don't get a single thing. Being a guest at a wedding can be expensive anyway and we invited people because we want them to share our day, not because we want presents.

Ginkythefangedhellpigofdoom · 25/03/2019 17:26

Dp and I gave £10 each (so £20) towards their honeymoon when we were invited as evening guests to a wedding last year.

greenpop21 · 25/03/2019 17:26

It's totally fine.A beautiful card with a nice message would mean more to me.

pootyisabadcat · 25/03/2019 17:29

Absolutely fine!

Meandmetoo · 25/03/2019 17:31

I only spend about £20 when I'm not skint! It's fine op.

NWQM · 25/03/2019 17:31

Personally I'd buy a nice bottle of wine and wrap it nicely rather than just give cash - even if they have asked for it. Means you feel like you are taking more.

That said I wouldn't expect anything and especially wouldn't want you to give what you haven't got.

Hope you are doing okay post redundancy and good luck with the job hunting.

listsandbudgets · 25/03/2019 17:32

Its lovely of you. Alternatively give them a box of nicely wrapped chocolates. Its the thought that counts. I wouldn't judge at all.

Farmerswifey12 · 25/03/2019 17:34

I got an I.O.U on my wedding, I rather shocked but understood the situation.

So from my point of view £10 is absolutely fine!

greenpop21 · 25/03/2019 17:40

Aldi sell lovely, award winning champagne for £9.99. Wrap in nice tissue paper and cellophane. Would rather receive that than most things really!

Original poster

DumbleDork · 25/03/2019 17:53

NWQM Thankyou. It’s stressful and made even worse by my husband being at risk too but I’ve got a few interviews lined up so fingers crossed

OP posts:

LEELULUMPKIN · 25/03/2019 22:25

Anyone who knows you and judges you for the position you are in is not worth knowing anyway OP. Give what you can afford and have a great time.

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